


Maybe

by cheonsana



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, why cant we all use jeongyeon instead of jungyeon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-11-02 04:09:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 48,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10936686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheonsana/pseuds/cheonsana
Summary: Kim Dahyun is a graduating college student from Yonsei University, along with Son Chaeyoung and Im Nayeon. Their other friends have already graduated, but she's still in touch with all of them. Well, except for one.





	1. I'll Get You Out Of My Head

**Author's Note:**

> had this posted on aff first (9yeoshins), with 8 chapters already written. still ongoing tho so i decided to post it here too (since i dont see much saida fanfics in here) 
> 
> please bear w my piece-o-shit writing and should you encounter grammatical errors, i apologize. im still tryna improve my writing c:
> 
> anyway, let's go

_I’ve been having bad dreams. Sleepless nights. Countless times of staring into nothingness. Then tearing up, for no apparent reason. Or maybe there is._

 

_Maybe this is okay. It is part of making yourself feel alive, right? To feel hurt kind of validates that, yeah, you’re still here in this world, breathing, feeling, like any other human do._

_Maybe this is okay, to constantly feel empty, and to abhor that feeling because you actually knew the feeling of belonging to someone. To know that someone wants you and appreciates you took you into different heights but, for some reasons – reasons that no one had control of – life made a way to just cut those wings and let you fall into the deep, dark void of your insecurities and flaws. And now, you can see nothing but those._

 

_Maybe this is okay, because at last, I can see her smiling without forcing it. At last, she can now laugh genuinely and wholeheartedly. At last, she can do whatever she wants. At least I can still witness it, even though I’m pretty sure I’m not the one giving her those anymore._

 

_At last, she found happiness._

 

_But not in me._

 

_And maybe, this is okay._

 

_I’ll be okay._

 

\--

 

The strong aroma of coffee tickled her nose and the loud playing of “Mr. Brightside” on speakers inside the bathroom woke her senses.

 

 _7:30 A.M,_ the clock reads.

 

It’s a Saturday, so there are no classes – meaning,  college students are supposedly still snoring at this kind of hour, trying to take advantage of the whole day to recover all those sleepless nights spent for studying (and for others, partying.)

 

So, the fact that her roommate is brewing coffee on a Saturday morning got her baffled.

 

“Jeongyeon, I’m gonna throw your speakers down the road!” Dahyun shouted from her room. She managed to get up – well, she’s sitting on the corner of her bed, eyes still closed, hair still dishevelled. She barely had some sleep last night. Having done three papers for three different classes and one video presentation for her major class got her busy until 4:00AM. Or was it 4:30? She can’t even remember. All she know is that she deserves an undisturbed 12-hour sleep but thanks to her best friend’s jamming session in the shower, the much-anticipated sleep became a 3-hour blink. It felt like a blink.

 

She was about to get attracted by her bed again until her door harshly open, with Jeongyeon behind it,  continuing her little karaoke show.

 

“IT WAS ONLY A KISS, IT WAS ONLY A KI—“, Dahyun flung a pillow towards Jeongyeon, expertly hitting her face, and stopping her so-called concert.

 

“I swear if you bug me any longer, I’m gonna strangle you.” Dahyun uttered groggily.

 

“Oh, you wouldn’t do that~”, Jeongyeon replied, in a cute tone that she knows Dahyun hated the most.

 

“Yeah I think I would, I’d do everything just to shut your pie hole up.” She lied down her bed again, covered her entire body with a blanket, silently hoping Jeongyeon would just disappear and let her sleep.

 

“Hey, are you going to sleep again? You should get ready!” She jumped beside Dahyun’s bed and shakes her to prevent her from going to dreamland.

 

“For what? Did you schedule something for me that I’m not aware of?”

 

“Our girlies are coming back today! We gotta fetch them from the airport.”

 

Dahyun cried. “But I’m really sleepy today… I barely had 3 hours of sleep. I didn’t even get to have a good morning because I woke up to your singing.”

 

Jeongyeon retorted, “Oh come on! I can totally sing. Mr. Brightside is a song that not everyone can sing easily! Definitely not for beginners.”

 

“Okay whatever. Can’t you just tell Momo and Mina that I love and miss them so much?”

 

“If you really miss them, you’ll come with me to the airport. Plus, are you really gonna make me go alone?” Jeongyeon muttered.

 

Dahyun rolled her eyes and took the blanket off her face. “Fine. But this costs one ramen and you gotta help me with my thesis later.”  

 

“Well that’s easy. Now go get up!” Jeongyeon stands up and pulls Dahyun off her tempting bed.  

 

“Yeah you don’t really have to drag me—AH!” Dahyun exclaimed while clutching her right foot. She stepped on one of Jeongyeon’s lego pieces. Again.

 

“Yoo Jeongyeon…” Dahyun spoke in a low, scary voice.

 

Jeongyeon let go off Dahyun’s arm and muttered, “Well… at least you’re fully awake now… right?”

 

“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!” Dahyun shouted as she grabs one of her pillows and chased Jeongyeon around their apartment.

 

\--

 

After their little Tom and Jerry show earlier, Dahyun finally took a bath and is currently getting ready in her room. Meanwhile, Jeongyeon is enjoying her coffee while watching baking videos on YouTube.

 

After a few minutes, Dahyun stepped out of her room, wearing a Vans snapback, gray sweatshirt, a pair of ripped jeans, and sneakers. “Any updates from the two? Did they arrive at the airport already?”, she asked. She grabs her phone from the table and checked the time: _9:05 A.M._

 

“Not yet.” Jeongyeon replied, still focusing on the “Easy Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe” she’s watching.

 

“Did they at least tell you an ETA?”

 

“Yeah. Around 11:30.”

 

“Alright.” Dahyun opens the refrigerator, grabs a box of chocolate milk and proceeds to pour herself a glass. “I guess we can still grab some lunch before heading off. Have you tried the new beef place down the block?”

 

Jeongyeon closed her laptop and replied, “Not yet! Rei’s was the name, wasn’t it? Didn’t they have a grand opening yesterday? I heard they gave away coupons. They’ll also give student discounts until next week.”

 

“Yeah. Let’s hit that one.”

 

“They also serve free Soju at 8PM onwards.“ Jeongyeon grinned.

 

“Shut up. We just got wasted last Wednesday night.”

 

“That night was really fun. Jihyo was so drunk she laughs at everything she sees. Nayeon better pass more exams so she can continue treating us free alcohol.” 

 

“Oh god, this leecher. Anyway, can you call Chaeyoung and ask if she wants to come with us to lunch?” Dahyun puts her finished glass in the sink, then headed back towards her room. She puts on some perfume, a little bit of powder, and lotion on her skin. She really loved that lotion, it smelled like vanilla.

 

“Already ahead of you. She said she’ll meet us there.” Jeongyeon went to her room to keep her laptop and grabbed her black leather jacket and a pair of sunglasses. “Oh, by the way, Momo asked if we can pick up the giant penguin stuff toy she ordered for Mina’s birthday. She said it’s a surprise.”

 

“How big are we talking about? And how the hell are we going to hide it from Mina?”

 

“I haven’t seen it yet. And Momo told me to just drop it in their apartment. She already told her landlady that we’re coming.” Jeongyeon proceeds to tying her shoelaces and dusting her shoes off.

 

“Okay then. Let’s go before Chaeng decides to hibernate again.”

 

\--

 

The weather was surprisingly good that day. It was a bit cloudy so the sun’s rays wasn’t that harsh, plus a slight wind. Dahyun thought of asking Jeongyeon if they could just walk down to Rei’s but Jeongyeon has a car and they have still have to do a lot of things after lunch. _Ah, such a waste of a good weather,_ she thought.

 

After Jeongyeon unlocked the car doors, both of them hopped in. “My playlist for today,” Dahyun exclaimed.

 

“Okay, wow. First of all, this is my car. Second of all, why would I let you? You literally just insult my singing earlier this morning!” Jeongyeon retorted.

 

“Because I’m your best friend for 5 years and you love me,” she replied while showing her cute gestures with finger hearts.

 

Jeongyeon pushed Dahyun’s face. “I do love you but stop making me cringe. I feel like my lifespan has just been reduced by 10 years. It’s going to be your fault if I die early.”

 

“Fine.”

 

The ride was short, but they did enjoy jamming to Beyonce even if they were only able to play 3 songs before reaching the restaurant. Dahyun went out of the car and into the restaurant first while Jeongyeon parked her car. She made a quick scan of the resto, looking for the familiar silhouette of their friend.

 

All of a sudden, her vision went black as someone’s hands were blocking her eyes from behind, holding her head firmly.

 

“Give me your money and your phone,” the person mumbled in a low voice.

 

“….” Dahyun did not reply.

 

“Hey, I said—“

 

“You , Son Chaeyoung. I can still smell a hint of morning breath out of your mouth.” Dahyun answered, as she grabbed the hands and took it off her face.

 

“Hey! I brushed my teeth this morning! How dare y—“

 

“Yeah you may have but I also know that you took another nap before going here so shut up and find us a table.” Dahyun looks around for an available space.

 

Chaeyoung chuckled. “Wow. I didn’t know you could tell whether I took a nap or what.”

 

“Can’t doubt the years of friendship, eh?”

 

“Right.” Chaeyoung spotted a table near the glass window. “Let’s sit there so I can check out some pretty boys and girls outside.”

 

Dahyun smacks Chaeyoung’s head for her remark, but walks toward the table anyway. Just seconds after, Jeongyeon opened the door and joined the both of them.

 

“Ey!” Chaeyoung exclaimed at the sight of Jeongyeon. She gets up excitedly and greets her with a hug. “How are you? I missed you so much, do you know that?”

 

“Okay, you’re squeezing me too tight I can’t breathe.” Jeongyeon muttered.

 

Chaeyoung releases Jeongyeon, leaving her gasping for breath. “Sometimes I don’t like it when you miss me.”

 

“Oh come on, I know you missed me too. Also, you still promised to treat me a meal! I guess that day is today~” Chaeyoung replied as her eyes glimmer at the thought of free food.

 

“Now I get why you miss me.” Jeongyeon rolled her eyes. “Go pick whatever you want on the menu.”

 

They started scanning the menu. Dahyun picked the first thing she saw and continued checking her phone. Jeongyeon wasn’t feeling really hungry so she ordered a beef salad.

“What’s yours, Chaeng?”

 

“Uhm, I’m gonna have this, this, and this.” Chaeyoung replied while pointing onto the three different meals she wanted.

 

“Who do you think I am, your mom? Keep it under $30.” Jeongyeon retorted.

 

Chaeyoung frowned. “But you told me to pick whatever I want! Plus you already have a job, I know you can buy this much.”

 

“Hey, an accountant’s salary is  just average and I’m saving up for that cool pair of shoes I saw on the internet. Now pick. Under $30 dollars.” Jeongyeon said while scrolling on her phone.

 

Chaeyoung heaved a sigh. “Fine.”

 

After placing their order, the three continued to chat with each other. Since Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung have a lot to catch up on, Dahyun just let them talk to each other. She sees them both almost everyday anyway. Jeongyeon’s her roommate, Chaeyoung’s her classmate in one major subject and one extra subject. She glanced outside the glass window, just silently watching the busy streets. Across the street, she saw a familiar Ramen place.

 

_“I still have lots of energy. Let’s go somewhere else!”_

 

_“But I’m hungry. I wanna eat.”_

 

_“Hmm. Okay. But don’t tell me the food that’s on your mind right now. I’ll try to guess.”_

 

_“Okay.”_

 

_Clutching each other’s hand, she dragged her to a nearby Ramen restaurant._

 

_“Well, aren’t you a mind reader.”_

 

_“I know, right? I’m awesome like that.”_

 

_“Yeah. That’s why I like you.”_

 

_“W-what?”_

 

_“I’m really hungry now. Let’s go! My treat.”_

 

_“But—“_

 

Jeongyeon smacked the back of Dahyun’s head. “You’re spacing out again! Eat your food while it’s hot. We still have a lot to do.”

 

Dahyun clutched the hit area while glaring at Jeongyeon. “I hope you choke on that beef you’re eating.” Her threat fell on deaf ears so she just went on eating her meal.

 

Although deep in her mind, Dahyun thanks Jeongyeon for stopping her train of thought.


	2. I'll Forget All The Things You Said

“I’m definitely going back to this place.”

Jeongyeon said while stuffing the remaining chunks of meat and lettuce into her mouth. Chaeyoung nodded in agreement. “Same. The beef is so soft. I felt so emotional while chewing it,” she joked while downing her food with a glass of cola.

“The aesthetic of the place itself is impressive too. I think Jeongyeon would be treating me often here.” Dahyun replied, while looking around and appreciating the intricate modern design of the place.

 “Oh, this is so good. I think I just had a mouthgasm,” Jeongyeon exclaimed while continuously chewing, not even minding Dahyun’s remark about treating.

 “Yeah, it would be good if you wipe that white thing off the corner of your lip.” Chaeyoung smirked suggestively.

“How dirty can yo—“

“She was referring to the mayo, you id*ot.” Dahyun remarked.

“Your perverted minds keep on getting worse, I think I should be worried. These kids…” Jeongyeon muttered while grabbing a tissue in the middle of the table. She was the last one to finish, even though the other two had a relatively bigger amount of food.

“What perverted minds? I can say that I have a super pure heart and soul.” Dahyun said in a calm tone. “I don’t know about Chaeyoung though. I caught her one time alone inside an empty classroom while watching something malicious on her phone.”

Chaeyoung almost choked on the water she was drinking. “Hey, I wasn’t watching anything like that! Why would you accuse me of something like that? Do I look like a pervert to you?”

“Well, based on the sly smile and enlarged eyes you had that time, I’d have to say yes. And come on, don't be shy. Watching porn is totally acceptable. There's nothing wrong with that.” Dahyun smirked.

“Wow. And who says you have a pure heart and soul? Oh wait,” Chaeyoung grabs her phone and pretends to open a new message. “Jesus just texted me. He said you’re lying, and that he knows about the pictures you’ve been browsing on incognito. See?” 

“Aish, these children. Stop bickering and go get up. Wait for me outside, I’m just gonna go pay the bill.” Jeongyeon asked the waiter for the bill while Chaeyoung and Dahyun stood up and walked outside of the resto.

“Hey, by the way, we’re supposed to pass the paper on our Philo class online, right? Until tomorrow?” Chaeyoung asked while popping a mint candy into her mouth.

“Yeah. I already passed mine earlier.” Dahyun replied.

“Wow. Who is this person? The Kim Dahyun I know starts her paper an hour before the deadline. Hello? I need to talk to that Dahyun.” Chaeyoung said while teasingly knocking at Dahyun’s head.

“Ha ha, funny. I got no time for slacking anymore, Chaeng. It’s our last semester and I need to ace my subject so that I’d still be up for latin honors.” Dahyun said in a serious tone.

“Good for you then. To be really honest, I’m proud of you,” Chaeyoung replied. “So proud I might cry,” she added, while trying to wipe fake tears. “How’s your thesis going?”

“I’m doing just fine, I guess. I sent a progress report to my mentor last week and she just asked for some revisions on the results.”

“That’s impressive. We still have about a month before graduation and you’re almost done with your thesis?” Chaeyoung exclaimed in awe.

“I gotta finish it early so that I can laugh at your busy asses on finals week. I’m gonna enjoy a good movie marathon sesh with a couple of drinks and bowls of popcorn all to myself, while you guys pull your hairs off out of stress,” Dahyun teased.

“Damn it. I’m still halfway on my thesis and my painting’s progress is stuck. I’m lacking inspiration nowadays. I don’t even know where to search for some creative juices. It’s so frustrating to the point that sometimes I just stare at my canvass for a good 30 minutes and just give up.” She sighed. “My mentor’s already asking me for progress reports and she asked me to meet her at her office next week.”

Dahyun suddenly felt guilty for her insensitive remark, and gave Chaeyoung a good pat on the shoulders. “It’s okay. Don’t be too pressured by anything. It’s one of the enemies of artists. You need to breathe. And don’t worry, I was just joking earlier. If ever I really do finish my thesis early, I’m gonna help you with whatever you need.”

Chaeyoung smiled. “I know. Remember when we got so high on the night of Momo’s birthday party? We almost used up all my paints on that canvass.”

They both laughed at the memory. “Why would I forget that? That’s our collab painting!”

“What collab painting? You painted a petal of a flower! And after that, you went outside and I heard you giggling to yourself.”

“I did no-- Whatever. Hey! Maybe that’s what you need…” Dahyun smiled suggestively. “Weed.”

Chaeyoung grinned at the idea too. “It does supply me lots of creative juices. Maybe some other time. That would be my last resort.”

A loud honk interrupted them. They walked towards Jeongyeon’s car and hopped in. Chaeyoung’s at the backseat while Dahyun positioned herself in the shotgun seat.

“Where we headed?” Chaeyoung asked.

“Gotta pick up some giant penguin stuff toy, so enjoy the space back there while you still can.” Jeongyeon replied while smoothly driving down the road.

“Oh. Mina’s going to flip the moment she sees that.” Chaeyoung chuckled.

“How’d you know it’s for Mina?” Dahyun asked while browsing her playlist.

“You’re not a real friend of Mina if you don’t know that she has lots of penguin goodies. She even watches random penguin videos before going to sleep when we were roommates. By the way, who are we fetching? The three marias?”

“Momo and Mina.” Jeongyeon replied.

“Oh. What about Sana? When’s the b*tch coming back?”

“I don’t know. But Momo did mention about a business trip in Taiwan that Sana has to go to.”

“Dang, I guess Sana’s doing really well with her job. She better go back here with lots of gifts for us.” Chaeyoung said. Jeongyeon nodded in agreement. There was a slight moment of silence in the car. Dahyun got particularly quiet since _her name_ has been mentioned.

_Glad she’s doing well with her work. As expected anyway._ Dahyun thought.

“Dahyun. Song please.” Jeongyeon requested.

“Right.” Dahyun snapped from her thoughts again and chooses to play a hiphop playlist. As soon as the beat from the song plays, the gang turns their crazy on.

“DJ Dubu in the house, wassuuuup!!! Who wants some sick beats, huh? Put your hands up!” Dahyun exclaimed while doing a ‘hands up’ gesture.

“WE!!!” The other two shouted while their hands up. “Your speakers are no joke, Jeong. The bass can totally bore hole through my soul,” Chaeyoung praised.

“I know. They’re my babies.” Jeongyeon smiled proudly.

They continued their little clubbing inside the car, not minding the weirded-out stares of the people from the outside. Dahyun turned the volume even higher, to block whatever thoughts she was having earlier. 

_Guess she's happy, then_.  _Ugh, I said stop!_ Dahyun thought while she's having an internal fight with herself. She decided to sing and rap along very loud while doing lots of partying moves just to drown the thoughts of  _her._  

 

\---

 

After picking up the giant penguin stuff toy (and Momo wasn’t even joking about how giant it is), the gang drove up to Momo and Mina’s apartment to drop it off. DJ Dubu continues to play the sickest beats in her playlist. Everyone in the car was so pumped… except for one. There might have been a little bit of difficulty in fitting the penguin inside the car—well, Chaeyoung’s view is totally blocked by the penguin’s tummy the whole drive. She can’t even go on her full clubbing mode because her movements are restricted by the goddamn penguin. She continues on rapping and singing along, though.

After a good 30-minute drive, they finally arrived at their destination. Jeongyeon slowly parked on the side of the rode and spoke, “You two stay here. I’ll leave the penguin inside. I’ll be in and out. Time check, please?”

“10:25,” Dahyun replied.

“Okay. The traffic today is not so heavy anyway so I think we’re gonna get to the airport right on schedule. Be right back!” Jeongyeon stepped out of the car and opened one of the door at the backseat to get the penguin stuff toy. Chaeyoung helped her and pushed it out.

“There you go. The goddamn penguin’s gone, so hit it up DJ!” Chaeyoung shouted as she regained her excitement the moment the penguin was gone. Dahyun plays Bang Bang Bang by Bigbang, and both of them went on clapping and singing along from the start until the end of the song.

“Song request please. ‘Caroline’ by Amine.” Chaeyoung shouted. She has to shout because the car is literally vibrating because of the music.

“Alright, your highness,” Dahyun searches for the music and plays it. The two played around and mimic the music video’s car scene. They enjoy playing around so much that they didn’t notice that Jeongyeon’s taking a video of them from the outside. They came to their senses when they heard Jeongyeon opening the door.

“You guys looked so high. Did you ask the waiter for some additional ‘ingredient’ earlier?” Jeongyeon teased.

Dahyun rolled her eyes. “Like you weren’t earlier. I have to shout at you for raising both of your hands up. Do you want us to die?”

“I’m gonna upload this on our groupchat later. We still got less than an hour left.”

“Gonna change my playlist to ballads. I think I just used up the remaining energy from the Red Bull I drank last night. I’m gonna take a quick nap. Chaeyoung, pass me that neck pillow.” Dahyun said as she scrolls up and down her phone. Chaeyoung handed her the panda one while she grabbed the other that says ‘dope’ in it’.

“Same. Gotta take a quick nap too.” Chaeyoung propped herself and lied down.

With ‘If’ by Kim Taeyeon playing in the background, they had a peaceful drive towards the airport.

 

\---

 

Having found a vacant parking spot, Jeongyeon woke up the two sleepyheads. Not without taking a little memento first. She quickly grabbed her phone and took a photo of the two. Dahyun had her mouth open, even snoring loud, while Chaeyoung’s drool is dripping from her mouth, leaving a wet spot on Jeongyeon’s backseat. Jeongyeon took a picture of her fingers up Dahyun’s nostrils and she didn’t even budge.

Feeling satisfied with the photos she’s taken, she tapped their shoulders to wake them up. “Hey kids, wake up. We’re already here.”

The two finally woke up and started to fix their appearance. Chaeyoung got up, but spaces out seconds after. Jeongyeon threw a box of tissue to her. Chaeyoung was startled.

“Hey, wipe that drool of yours! And thank you for leaving a wet mark on my seat,” Jeongyeon exclaimed while turning off the engine. They all stepped out of the car and proceeded to the arrival area of the airport.

“Are they here yet? Dahyun asked groggily.

“Yeah. I just received a text from Momo earlier. Oh wait, she’s calling. Hang on.” Jeongyeon answered the phone call while leading the way towards the waiting area. The two followed like dead vegetables—all they can think of right now is sleep.          

“Okay guys. We have to wait here. Keep an eye for a blondie on a denim jacket, and a black-haired girl with a beige coat.” Jeongyeon glanced behind to see two people, eyes closed, totally sleeping while standing. _Wow. Pure talent._ Jeongyeon thought. She gave the two a light smack on the head to wake them up again.

“NOT SLEEPING!” Chaeyoung exclaimed while opening her eyes wide as evidence.

“You sure love smacking our heads, don’t you?” Dahyun glared at Jeongyeon, who just grinned in return.

“They’re near. Should we make a banner or something?” Jeongyeon suggested.

“Yeah. Where are we going to get materials though? I don’t have a pen nor a paper in my bag,” Dahyun replied while searching for possible materials in her bag.

“You guys are students and you don’t have any school materials in your bags?!”

“Well just in case you’ve forgotten, it’s a Saturday so why would we carry around school supplies in our bags while going out?” Dahyun retorted.

“Guys, no need for that, I got a visual of the two.” Chaeyoung point at two girls on linked arms, walking towards the waiting area. The three of them waved crazily while screaming their name. The two girls noticed them and squealed in excitement. The two ran towards them.

“GIRLIES!!!” They hugged each other while squealing, earning stares of annoyance from the people around.

“Oh my god, we missed you so much!” Momo exclaimed while trying to catch her breath from running.

“So much! We were so busy planning my post-birthday celebration in the airplane. You better get ready for tonight guys, we bought lots of company for us.” Mina winked while doing a gesture of taking a shot of alcohol.

"Aren't you guys going to take a rest first or something?" Dahyun asked.

"We don't need that. Rest is for the weak. Plus, we are so pumped to see you guys!" Momo exclaimed.

“We are always ready! Do you guys not know us and the strength of our livers? Stop doubting us!” Chaeyoung yelled.

“We just thought that maybe your tolerance hasn’t improved, Chaeng. I still remember the night when three shots of tequila gave you a major hangover. I mean, three? Really? I can still make my final paper with that.” Momo teased. Everyone laughed at the memory.

“Huh. Whatever. I’m gonna show you tonight. I’ll be the last man standing!” Chaeyoung declared, not minding the ridiculed stare from the rest of the gang.

“We’ll see. Let’s go guys, we got tons of catching up to do with these two.” Jeongyeon said as she put her arms on Momo and Mina’s shoulders and led the way towards the parking lot.  


	3. Drunk Stories

Windows rolled down, various songs blasting on the speakers, endless jamming. Who said going home from a trip is energy-draining? Apparently not with this squad. If only Jeongyeon’s car had larger space, Momo might even host a freestyle dance battle. But as soon as they noticed that they’ve been inhaling too much smoke from the vehicles in the highway, they had to roll the windows up again.

 

Upon reaching Momo’s apartment, everyone stepped out of the car and helped Mina and Momo with their luggage, while continuously singing while they’re walking towards the elevator. Everyone but Jeongyeon.

 

“Guys, it was fun and all, but just in case you haven’t noticed, the song finished 10 minutes ago.” Jeongyeon complained. There were people in the lobby staring at them, and Jeongyeon, being the tallest and the most visible in the pack, felt a bit of embarrassment.

 

“Yeah, right. I’m sorry,” Momo replied, apologizing to the residents around who seemed kind of disturbed. The others followed.

 

The elevator finally arrived and when its doors opened, they entered as fast as they could. As soon as the door closed, everyone burst out of laughter.

 

“That was f*cking awkward and embarrassing,” Dahyun said while trying to fan her face with her hands. “Now where were we?”

 

“The rap part on ‘Feeling Myself’! Alright guys, here we go,” Chaeyoung exclaimed as she prepared her throat for the rap part. She started the first two lines, and the others followed along.

 

“I can’t relate with you guys, the city fumes must’ve made you all high,” Jeongyeon rolled her eyes. “I don’t know any of you right now.”

 

As the chorus comes up, everyone turns their heads to Jeongyeon, urging her to sing along. She turned her back on them. _No, I can’t sing along, I already started being a kill joy earlier, I should take pride…_ Jeongyeon told herself. _But I like this part…_

 

“Feeling myself, I’m feeling myself, I’m feeling my~” The rest continued singing, still anticipating for Jeongyeon to hop on. All of a sudden, Jeongyeon turned. “Changed the game with that digital drop!” Jeongyeon finally gave in and sang Beyonce’s part. Everyone cheered and sang along as well. When the elevator stopped, Chaeyoung shouted, “WORLD, STOP!”

 

Everyone froze. The elevator doors made a ‘ding’ sound and opened, but there’s no one outside so Chaeyoung pushed the button to close it.

 

“Carry on,” Chaeyoung continued. Everyone laughed about how those lyrics fit in the situation.

 

The bunch of crazies finally reached the fifth floor, and alighted the elevator. They were excited to go inside Momo’s apartment, because it’s been a while since they’ve been there and Momo’s apartment is like their squad house back when all of them are still college students. They would always hang out, play some board games, and do a lot of fun and crazy stuff. Mostly crazy stuff.

 

Momo pulled Jeongyeon at the back and asked in a low voice, “Where did you put the penguin?”

 

“In the bed, lying down. You were serious about ‘giant’, huh?” Jeongyeon replied.

 

“Well, I have to go big or go home. She really wanted that penguin so I need to get it. Girlfriend duties,” Momo said proudly. That penguin was the last one available in stock, so luck was really on her side the moment she pressed ‘order’ and received an order confirmation. “Alright, go talk to Mina, and then I will go behind and wrap a blindfold on her,” Momo then pushed Jeongyeon forward.

 

“Heeeyyy, Mina!” Jeongyeon awkwardly uttered.

 

“What’s up, Jeong? You are acting kinda weird.” Mina asked, her forehead scrunched due to confusion. Jeongyeon just smiled, awkwardly as well. “Oh nothing, it’s just that, uh, your face is… glowing! Radiant! Japan is really something, huh?”

 

“Stop it, you.” Mina playfully hit Jeongyeon’s arm. “Well, it might be because I’m just so happy to finally meet Momo’s parents. Her dogs are so cute too—AH! What’s happening?” She was cut off by a handkerchief being wrapped around her head. Momo opened the door, and assisted Mina inside. “Momo, what’s this?”

 

“Just trust me,” Momo responded, with a hint of excitement. She opened their room’s door and turned the lights on. They both entered the room, facing the bed, while the others are watching from the back. They are all anticipating for Mina’s reaction.

 

“Babe, remember the giant penguin you can’t stop talking about last week?” Momo whispered to Mina’s ear.

 

“Y-yeah, why?”

 

“Guess.”

 

“I—you did not—“

 

“You can take your blindfold off now.” Momo instructed. Mina did, and while her eyes are still adjusting to the room’s lighting, she identified the stuffed toy lying on the bed.

 

“Oh my god. Oh my god oh my god oh my god!!!!” Mina raw towards the penguin and hugged it hard.

 

“I see that you love it,” Momo said. “Well, she said four ‘oh my god’.” Jeongyeon murmured.

 

“SO MUCH!” Mina looked at Momo and smiled widely. Momo felt like she won the lottery the moment she saw that gummy smile.

 

“If I have to buy every penguin goodies in the world just to see that smile, then I would.” Momo smiled. Seeing her girlfriend so happy is satisfying.

 

“You don’t have to do that, silly.” Mina let go of the stuffed toy and went to Momo. “Your existence in my world is more than enough, so if you want to see this smile for more years to come, then I hope you don’t go anywhere,” Mina replied while lovingly staring at Momo. She leaned in and gave her a peck on the lips. “But really, thank you.”

 

“I think the cheesy lines were unnecessary, considering that we are here,” Dahyun pointed out. “Just tell us if you want us to leave. We all know you can give Momo more than a peck on the lips.”

 

“Totally. Go do your thing, we will give you privacy.” Chaeyoung said with a tone of assurance, as she covered her eyes with her hands. The couple chuckled.

 

“D*mb*sses. No one’s going anywhere! We weren’t lying when we said we miss you. We’re going to p-a-r-t-y!” Momo exclaimed while pumping her hands up in the air and doing some club-dancing steps.

 

“Now I like where this is going! Wooo!” Jeongyeon jumped in, raising her hands in the air as well.

 

Dahyun scoffed. Just minutes ago Jeongyeon was being a real no-fun, now she gets excited about the ‘party’. “Gave up on the party pooper act when the idea of alcohol popped your mind, Jeongyeon?” she sneered.

 

Jeongyeon glared at Dahyun. “You’re the one to talk when I literally pulled you out of your bed and forced you to come with me to the airport. You’re gonna thank me later.”  

 

“Woah, calm down, party animals. We’re not having liquor until after dinner.” Mina noted, with an emphasis on ‘liquor’ and ‘after dinner’. “And no, I’m not going to take care of your drunk ass*s later because I’m planning to get wasted tonight!” she added. Sure, Mina doesn’t have any problem with drinking (her tolerance is about above average), but for the longest time she’s always been the one who takes care of anyone that gets drunk—always the one that’s left to clean up the scattered bottles and food wrappers, always the one who gets almost vomited on (good thing she has a fast reaction time), always the one who doesn’t have a space to sleep on (because all the drunk people take them)—and tonight, she’s not going to do any of that, because they will be the one taking care of her. She actually threatened Momo earlier in the plane that if Momo gets drunk faster than her, then she will be sleeping in the couch for a week.

 

Dahyun’s about to give a rebuttal to Jeongyeon, but she suddenly remembered her thesis. She needs to pass another progress report on Tuesday. “Hey! Didn’t you promise me that you’re going to help me in editing my thesis later?”

 

“Nope, no thesis, no anything academic-related sh*t tonight! We have lots of things to talk about! We can’t drink all these liquors all by ourselves, so,” Momo reacted. They are so excited to share all the fun things they’ve done in their vacation in Japan.

 

Dahyun sighed in protest. She was planning to do it tonight because she has a group meeting with her classmates for a report in a major class tomorrow. “But—“

 

“Oh, come on, please~ for me?” Momo rarely does aegyo but once she does, it means she genuinely wants something. It works on Dahyun every time. Not that she finds it charming, though.

 

“Ugh, fine. I’m only saying yes because I can’t see that aegyo anymore in my lifetime. And I don’t feel like doing it today anyway.”

 

“Only that? You didn’t miss us, then?” Mina said while faking a tone of hurt and disappointment. “I gotta say, that kind of hurts.”

 

“Oh come on,” Dahyun replied. “Of course I missed you! It’s just that I don’t miss Momo’s so-called aegyo. I’m not missing that thing ever,” she complained. Momo heard, and came up to Dahyun to continue teasing her with her ‘aegyo’, and apparently all the other people in the apartment, including her girlfriend.

 

“Babe, I love you and you know that, but that kiddie voice you’re trying to make has got to go or else…” Mina didn’t even have to continue her threat because Momo finally stopped the second she heard it.

 

“Done. Don’t make me sleep on the couch again please.” Momo muttered and approached Mina to give her a back hug. “I still feel like there’s a ghost watching me when I sleep there alone.”

 

Mina glanced at her back and smiled at Momo’s silliness. Now this is an effortlessly cute Momo. “You’re so cute, damn it,” she murmured. Momo blushed at the remark. “Wow, you were threatening me just seconds ago for acting cute and now you’re saying that I am? I don’t get you sometimes…” 

 

Jeongyeon went to the living room and turned the TV on. She flipped from channels to channels until she found a channel she found interesting—National Geographic. “Aw, they’re having a documentary on cubs! How cute is that?”

 

“Not as cute as penguins if you’d ask me,” Mina mumbled. Momo nodded in response, although those cubs on TV looked very cute. Mina went inside their room to unpack their bags.

 

“What are we gonna do before dinner anyway? We still have 5 hours or so,” Chaeyoung asked while grabbing a bag of popcorn from the kitchen. “Is this still good to eat?”

 

Momo grabbed the popcorn bag and started looking for an expiration date. “It still good, there’s still at least a week left before it expires.”

 

Chaeyoung happily took the popcorn back and opened it. The popcorn doesn’t taste at its best, but it’s still good to munch on. She went in front of the TV and sat on the couch along with Jeongyeon, who immediately reaches for the popcorn even before Chaeyoung gets to sit. Dahyun, on the other hand, sat on the other side of the couch and clutched on her phone.

 

“Hey Momoring, what’s your wifi password again?” she asked.

 

“dahyunniestoopid21,” Momo replied.

 

“Ha ha. You’re funny.”

 

“I wasn’t joking. That’s really the wifi password. Look.” Momo approached Dahyun and snatched her phone to type in the password. She tapped enter and waited for it to connect. “See?”

 

Dahyun scoffed. “You guys are too obsessed with me that you actually set me as your wifi password. I can’t even believe.”

 

“We’re not the one who changed that, though,” Mina yelled from the room.

 

Dahyun laughed at the lying attempt, but she rode with it. “Like I’m gonna believe that. So who did? A ghost, perhaps?” she yelled back.

 

“Sana did,” Momo blurted out. As soon as she realized it, her eyes widened.

 

Dahyun was taken aback at the reply, but she acted like it didn’t bother her. She shouldn’t be bothered anyway. “Oh. Okay.”

 

Awkwardness filled the room, and as soon as Jeongyeon felt it, she cleared her throat. “Stop making too much noise! We’re trying to watch here!” she bawled.

 

“You are watching cubs and pregnant tigers! Don’t get too worked up. Give me the remote control,” Momo said as she snatched it out of Jeongyeon’s hand and switched the channel to a food channel.

 

While all of them are engrossed with their own business, Dahyun tried to distract her thoughts with random videos on YouTube.

 

It was really a _ghost_ then, and she tries not to let _it_ haunt her anymore.

 

\--

 

Two hours have passed. Mina had finished unpacking about an hour ago, so she joined Momo, Jeongyeon, and Chaeyoung for a ‘Modern Family Season 5’ marathon and is already on episode 6, while Dahyun fell asleep with her earphones on while listening to some music from her phone. After a few more episodes, Mina checked her phone for the time: _5:15 PM._ She stood up and did a bit of stretching.

 

“We gotta buy some groceries for tonight’s dinner,” she said in the middle of yawning. Momo’s face lighten up at the mention of ‘dinner’.

 

“Can we buy some j—“

 

“Your jokbal’s already on the list babe, calm down.” Mina reassured. She grabbed a pen and a piece of paper to list down the things they’re going to buy. “What do you guys want for dinner?”

 

“Tteokbokki!” Chaeyoung exclaimed. “And bulgogi!”

 

“Plus a box of pizza please,” Jeongyeon requested, still watching another episode.

 

“Alright.” Mina wrote down all the ingredients that they need. After she’s done, she asked Jeongyeon to go with her to the grocery store just 20 minutes from their apartment building. The two groomed up a bit, and finally went out, leaving the other three in the apartment. Dahyun’s still asleep, trying to recover the sleep Jeongyeon took away from her earlier that morning.

 

“How’s your Japan trip? I wasn’t able to frequently check our group chat because of all the exhibits and art shows I have to attend to,” Chaeyoung asked. She was a bit guilty because she’s been a bit busy lately, that’s why the moment she heard from Dahyun that they’re coming back today, she immediately saved the date.

 

Momo smiled proudly. “It was very good. Mina came with us on a 3-day family trip, and I went over to their house for Mina’s birthday celebration too.” She still feels ecstatic at the memory. “We were very worried before, about how they would react about our relationship. It wasn’t easy at first, but after some time, they finally tried to understand and took it well, and we’re really glad about that. My mom and Mina are really getting along now. I almost broke in tears when I saw them laughing at each other’s stories.”

 

Chaeyoung felt genuinely happy for her friends. She has witnessed how the two began, and how they overcame the struggles they had in the past and it makes her proud how they can still overcome a lot of obstacles in the present. “That’s really good to hear. I’m so proud of you two,” Chaeyoung said as she faked a tear.

 

“Id*ot. But really, I’m so thankful of everything that’s happening so far. Japan was home, but it felt more than home when Mina came with me. I don’t even know how to exactly explain what I’m feeling right now.” Momo smiled. “And thank you, guys, for always being there for us.”

 

“Psh, that’s nothing compared to the free food you give us,” Chaeyoung and Momo shared a good laugh.

 

“Right. And free liquor tonight too. You better pay us back when you and Dahyun finally graduate and get an actual job,” she demanded.

 

“Yeah, sure,” Chaeyoung reassured. She glanced at Dahyun, who is still sleeping soundly. “She’s in a real deep slumber.”

 

“I know, right?” Momo agreed. She found a lipstick on a desk, then an idea popped on her mind. She called Chaeyoung, pointed at the lipstick and to Dahyun, and made drawing gestures. Chaeyoung got the message, and grinned mischievously.

 

“You’re an art major, right? Now is the time to prove your artistic talent, Chaeng,” Momo told Chaeyoung as she handed her the lipstick. “Here’s your canvass,” she added as she pointed towards Dahyun’s peaceful face.

 

They spent a good 40 minutes trying to suppress their laughter while Dahyun enjoyed her well-deserved sleep, only that her face is covered with obnoxious red drawings.

 

“We better hide the moment she wakes up.” Momo whispered.

 

They continued their marathon earlier with another series. They were so focused on the storyline that they barely heard Jeongyeon and Mina enter the apartment. They brought in two grocery bags full of food.

 

“Look at these two. They didn’t even bother offering help,” Jeongyeon ranted. “Hey! Help us prepare the ingredients or else you’re not getting any,” she threatened. The two immediately stood up and went to the kitchen.

 

Mina went up to Dahyun to wake her up, but the moment she saw Dahyun’s face, she couldn’t hold her laughter. Momo and Chaeyoung can barely hold it in either, knowing exactly the reason behind Mina’s uncontrollable laughter.

 

Jeongyeon was very confused about what’s happening, so she approached Mina. “What’s wrong?”

 

Mina pointed to Dahyun’s sleeping figure. “What the— what did you do?!” she asked Momo and Chaeyoung while laughing along.

 

“We’re bored,” Momo replied. “And hungry,” Chaeyoung added.

 

All of a sudden, Dahyun moved and opened her eyes. The loud laughing noises disturbed her slumber. She sat up straight, still puzzled about what’s happening around her. “What’s wrong with all of you? Are you guys already drunk?” she asked.

 

Jeongyeon gave her a mirror, and what she saw definitely woke her senses up. There were two big red circles around her eyes, a line under her nostril that looked like a nosebleed, red dots on her cheeks, and a writing in her forehead that says ‘Loser’.

 

“Who did this?” Dahyun growled. Mina pointed to the two culprit in the kitchen. Momo and Chaeyoung ran towards the bedroom the moment Dahyun leaped out of the couch.

 

“I’M GOING TO KILL BOTH OF YOU!”

 

\--

 

It was chaos inside the bedroom. Pillows were thrown everywhere, blankets all over the place. When Jeongyeon and Mina’s laughter subsided, they went back to the kitchen to prepare dinner. Jeongyeon prepared the ingredients while Mina started to prepare for cooking.

 

“Kids! Are you done? We’d appreciate a little bit of help in here,” Jeongyeon shouted. The three went out of the room, all dishevelled and panting. Dahyun marched towards the bathroom to wash her face, while the two proceeded to the kitchen.

 

“What do you need?” Chaeyoung asked, still trying to catch her breath.

 

Jeongyeon handed her the other ingredients that needs to get sliced. Jeongyeon instructed Momo to order her jokbal and the pizza on the phone. Dahyun went out of the bathroom, wiping her face off with a towel. While Mina’s working on the Tteokbokki, Dahyun grilled the bulgogi.

 

After placing the orders, Momo grabbed the audio jack and plugged it in her phone. She started playing random songs while checking her Facebook newsfeed. The pizza came 30 minutes later, just in time with the tteokbokki and bulgogi. Jeongyeon prepared the dishes on the dining table while Dahyun helped Mina clean up a bit in the kitchen.

 

“Food’s ready!” Jeongyeon yelled. Momo and Chaeyoung grabbed their seats as their eyes glimmer at the sight of food. “My jokbal hasn’t arrived yet?” Momo asked. As if on cue, they heard a knock on the door. Momo ran towards the door to get the dish that she definitely missed while she was in Japan.

 

Everyone grabbed their own seats and started eating. They would occasionally talk about things, but they were too hungry to talk. A good 20 minutes has passed, and everyone was finished. Momo volunteered to wash the dishes, since she didn’t help with the preparation that much. Mina grabbed a bucket, opened the fridge and filled it up with 5 bottles of soju, while the others walked towards the living room. Chaeyoung switched the playlist into upbeat songs, signalling that the party’s about to start.

 

“Hey, do you still have that portable karaoke machine?” Jeongyeon asked.

 

“Of course! It’s in the room. Dahyun, go get it,” Momo instructed. Dahyun went inside the bedroom to get it, then Chaeyoung helped her set it up. Mina placed the bucket of soju bottles on top of the coffee table, and the three immediately grabbed their bottles.

 

“Slow down, alcoholics, we still have more to come,” Mina noted. She opened her own bottle and chugged a bit. “Ah, so refreshing.”

 

Jeongyeon was the first one to put songs in the karaoke machine. The first 7 songs were all hers. It’s been a while since she went to a noraebang with any of her friends, and she’s been extra stressed lately for working until late at night, so she could use a lot of singing and alcohol in her system to de-stress once in a while. 

 

Momo joined them few minutes later, and sat beside Mina. Everyone was singing along. Good thing their neighbors weren’t around (they checked with the landlady) or else they’re going to have a problem.

 

Two hours and 10 bottles of soju are down. Chaeyoung was already feeling a bit tipsy, but she’s not going to be the first one to get drunk tonight. Momo went to the kitchen to slice some lemon. She returned with a plate of sliced lemons on one hand, while holding a bottle of tequila in another. “Now here comes the real party!” she filled up everyone’s shot glasses.

 

“Alright, everyone grab a lemon and a shot glass,” She commanded. “On a count of 3, we’re all gonna shout ‘happy birthday Mina’ then take a shot, okay?”

 

“Okay!” everyone exclaimed.

 

“1, 2, 3!”

 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINA!”

 

\--

 

_10:07 PM._

The alcohol’s starting to work its wonders. Everyone’s getting a little bit crazier. They were finished with the karaoke, and is now swapping funny stories with each other. Chaeyoung and Mina were talking about an online game they’ve been playing. Jeongyeon acts like she gets whatever the two’s been talking about.

 

“Chaeyoung, are you still good?” Jeongyeon asked as she playfully pushed her to see if she can still sit straight. Chaeyoung almost fall off the couch, but immediately went back up.

 

“Of course I am!” she yelled, while doing a thumbs up gesture. “I’m not—drunk. Who’s drunk? You’re drunk!”

 

Everyone was laughing at her for her failed efforts of trying to stay sober. The ones that are the least drunk is Dahyun and Momo. Yeah, they were tipsy, but at least they can still walk straight.

 

“Give it up, Chaeyoung. Ever since Sana left, you’ve always been the weakest one,” Jeongyeon pointed out. Momo laughed at the thought of Sana.

 

“Yeah, too bad. I suddenly missed that b*tch. Sana’s definitely the funniest when drunk.”

 

They started talking about Sana and how much they miss having her around. Dahyun kept mum the whole time, as a certain memory plays in her head.

 

_The winter break is coming. The presence is very much felt by everyone every day, but it was particularly cold that night. The leaves from the trees sway along with the chilly wind, people had their layers of winter clothes on while having a cup of hot beverages of their choice. Winter is the perfect weather for cuddling and sleeping the whole day away. But not for Dahyun. Yeah, she gets attracted by her fluffy pillows and comfortable bed, but whenever she feels that she’s slowly getting seduced by the trap called dreamland, she constantly remind herself that unless she has done or finished something major for that day, then she doesn’t deserve resting or sleeping, no matter how tempting it is._

 

_It’s already 10PM and she still can’t find a steady momentum on making her final papers. The apartment’s atmosphere is kind of gloomy, since there’s no other presence than hers. Jeongyeon went out with her other circle of friends from the university’s volleyball team, so she wouldn’t be back probably until tomorrow. As much as she wants to toughen up and get through the night alone, she knows herself that she’s afraid of the dark. She can leave the lights on but that’s just wasteful, plus they had a high electric cost last month so she’s definitely not doing that. So, she made a decision and called a friend._

 

_“Hello?”_

 

_“Yo Dahyun-ah! What’s up?”_

 

_“Hey Momo. Can I crash at your place tonight? I have 2 papers to do, but I just don’t feel productive here in my apartment.”_

 

_“Oh sure, no problem. By the way, Mina’s here! Chaeyoung’s roommate, remember?”_

 

_“Yeah, yeah, I remember. What is she doing there?”_

 

_“We’re having a movie marathon tonight. My roommate’s coming too. You can join us if you want, after you’re done with your papers.”_

 

_Roommate? ”Oh yeah right, you got a new roommate 3 months ago. I guess it’s been a while since I’ve been there, I still haven’t met her. If ever I finish early, then sure.”_

 

_“Yeah. Don’t worry, I’ll introduce you guys to each other later. Anyway, come over here quickly! Just knock at the door.”_

 

_“Alright. Just gonna pack my things and I’ll be on my way. If ever I finish too late, can I sleep there?”_

 

_“Of course. You don’t even have to ask.”_

 

_“Yay! Thank you, you’re the best.”_

 

_“I already know that. Another thing! Can you buy us two bags of popcorn and a liter of Cola, please? I’ll just pay you when you get here.”_

 

_Dahyun sighed. “Fine. Is that all?”_

 

_“Yes. I love you~ Be careful on your way! We need that popcorn!”_

 

_“I’ll take care of your popcorn. Bye.” Dahyun hung up. She started packing all the essentials for studying and a set of uniform and undergarments. After arranging her stuff, she grabbed her backpack, went to the door to get her white coat and scarf, and finally went out._

_\---_

_The temperature drop was no joke._

 

_“Goddamnit, I should’ve worn more layers of clothing,” Dahyun whispered to herself. She was clutching really hard on the bag of food she bought from the convenience store, hoping she could get some warmth out of it, which she realized was a stupid idea since the bottle of Cola inside the bag was refrigerated. Her body won’t stop shivering and her teeth won’t stop chattering. She was never good with low temperatures._

 

_The store was just five minutes away from Momo’s, but she decided to power-walk her way to gain some body heat. Plus, she can’t wait for the welcoming warmth of Momo’s apartment. Just when she was about to take her last turn, she saw a blonde-haired girl, arms wrapped around herself, walking sloppily in front of her. The girl was only wearing a red long-sleeved shirt, washed-out jeans, and a pair of sneakers. Dahyun can just totally ignore her and proceed to power-walking, but the girl looked like her legs forgot its proper walking function, so she approached the girl._

 

_“Uhm, hey miss, are you okay? You’re shivering a lot,” Dahyun asked in a careful tone. The girl looked up and smiled._

 

_“Yeah, I’m tolly—tolly gooood.” The girl replied with a thumbs up, her eyes half opened. Dahyun barely heard and understand what she just said, but she can definitely smell the hint of alcohol from her breath. “So this girl’s drunk. For a second there she looked high,” she thought._

 

_“I, uhh, miss, I think you’re drunk.”_

 

_“Not drunk! Who’s drunk? I’m not!” The girl exclaimed. She almost lost her balance because of her unnecessary movements. Good thing, Dahyun was able to hold her._

 

_She’s out here, in the cold, with a drunk girl in her arms. What to do next?_

 

_“Is your home or apartment near here? I can at least walk you home, if that’s the case.” Dahyun offered. She didn’t know why she even offered, because that would cost her a lot of time, but she just did._

 

_The girl pointed at a familiar building—Momo’s apartment building. “Well, that would be easy then.” Dahyun told herself. She can feel the girl badly shivering from the cold, so she put down the bag of food on the floor, then took of her coat and wrapped it onto the girl._

 

_She didn’t have to, but then again, she just did._

 

_She wrapped her left arm on the girl’s waist and wrapped the girl’s right arm on her shoulders. “Alright. Tell me your unit number.”_

 

_“Fifth flo-or, unit won fight.”_

 

_“Unit won fight? What unit won fight?”_

 

_The girl then raised her hands, fingers spread out to make a ‘one’ and a ‘five’._

 

_“Okay. Fifteen, okay.” she quickly picked up the bag and slowly walked to the apartment building. All of a sudden, the girl stopped, “Wait!” she shouted._

 

_“Why? What’s the matter? Are you going to puke?”_

 

_“You!” the girl yelped._

 

_“Me?” Dahyun asked, confused._

 

_“Did you hear? Ice caps in Antartica continues to melt! It makes me so sad,” she sobbed. “We have to save the polar bears!”_

 

_Dahyun was dumbfounded. She tries to suppress her laugh, but the girl heard it. “Why are you laughing? This is not a laughing matter!” she then went on with a lecture on greenhouse gasses._

 

_Dahyun started regretting saying that it would be easy, because she’s basically the only one walking for the both of them._

 

_After a lot of ‘almost’ instances—almost falling down, almost breaking things along the way, almost snapping and almost leaving the girl in front of the elevator, they reached the fifth floor where unit fifteen is located. She’s literally just dragging the girl to her apartment. She doesn’t even want to start thinking why did she even bother offering help, she just wanted to get it done._

 

_“Alright, we’re here. Where are your keys?” Dahyun knew it’s kind of pointless to ask a drunk girl but it just felt wrong to take her bag and search for it herself._

 

_“You better look for your keys or else I’m leaving you out here,” Dahyun threatened. But instead, the girl started kicking the door._

 

_“Hey, what are you doing? Stop it or you’re gonna wake up tomorrow without a door!” Dahyun shouted. She tried pulling the girl away and faced her to the opposite direction. While in the midst of trying to stop the girl from wrecking it, the door suddenly opened._

 

_“Who the f*ck is trying to ruin my door?! Wait… Dahyun, is that you?”_

 

_Dahyun froze. That voice sounded exactly like the one she’s talking on the phone earlier. She glanced behind her and it validated her thoughts._

 

_“H-hey Momo, what are you doing in there?”_

 

_“This is my apartment unit, id*ot. What are you doing? Who is that?” Momo asked while she stepped out of the room and approached the two._

 

_“So—this girl—“_

 

_“Oh my god, Sana!”_

“…and then Dahyun stepped on one of my legos!” Jeongyeon laughed. “Right, Dahyun?”

 

Dahyun snapped out of her trance. Chaeyoung and Mina wasn’t there anymore. “What is it? Where’s Chaeng and Mina?”

 

“They’re both dead already. Mina’s in our room, Chaeng’s in the other room,” Momo answered.

 

“Oh okay. What are we talking about again?” Dahyun asked again.

 

“I was telling Momo about what happened earlier this morning.” Jeongyeon explained. “Are you okay? You spaced out for a long time. What’s on your mind?”

 

Dahyun shrugged. “Nothing.”

 

“Alright, let’s be real,” Momo said in a serious tone. “Do you get bothered every time Sana is brought up?”

 

“No.”

 

Silence.

 

“What?”

 

“I don’t buy it,” Jeongyeon replied. “Come on Dahyun, you know you can be honest to us about these things.”

 

“And I’m being honest when I said no.” Dahyun firmly responded. She sighed. “Guys, do you still don’t believe me when I say that I’m over her?”

 

Another silence.

 

“Unbelievable.” Dahyun scoffed. “Whatever, guys. I’m going to sleep.” Dahyun stood up, struggling a bit, and walked towards the other room.

 

“Well, I guess she wasn’t that drunk to tell the truth,” Momo mumbled.

 

Jeongyeon sighed in frustration.

 

“I sometimes hate it when I know her too much.”


	4. Ready To Go

The next three weeks was hell. Life-draining. Cups of coffees with a side of successive mental breakdowns— _totally fun._

 

Dahyun and Chaeyoung’s last semester is about to end. As much as they’d like to feel triumphant as their graduation date keeps on getting near and reachable, the seemingly ray of light at the end of the dark tunnel keeps on getting blurry as heavy clouds of stress and anxiety reign over their remaining days of preparation for their final requirements, final exams, and thesis defense. Considering that Yonsei is one of the most prestigious universities in the country, the standard for excellence is very high. This is the point where they have to crawl out of the hellhole called college, sometimes _literally_.

 

It was Monday of the finals week. Dahyun felt really lifeless and sleepy while on her way to the university. She had no sleep—after studying for 3 exams scheduled on that day, she just took a shower and prepared. She was too scared to sleep, thinking that it was too risky, because these 3 subjects are very hard and there’s no way she’s gonna pass if she gave in to her bed. _Sleep is for the weak_ _,_ Dahyun would keep on telling herself.

 

Jeongyeon cooked her breakfast, and offered to take her to school on her way to work. She was worried about her because Dahyun was literally studying non-stop when she went in and out of the bed. It makes her remember her own college days, where their squad would come over at Momo's apartment to pull an all-nighter, keeping each other awake so they can finish their requirements. As much as she misses those moments, she doesn't want to go through all that again.

 

Upon their entrance inside the campus, dread is felt everywhere. The students walking towards their classes looked like zombies hungry for rest and happiness.  Everyone is walking lifelessly, and it’s not a surprising thing to see any more at this point in time. Jeongyeon stopped in front of Dahyun’s college building.

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to grab a coffee before having your exam? You didn’t drink one earlier this morning,” Jeongyeon asked, worry evident in her tone.

 

Jeongyeon might be annoying 90% of the time, but she’s there whenever Dahyun needed her. From helping her focus and finish her thesis, down to simple random encouragement texts that Jeongyeon tries hard not to seem too sweet, she appreciates all of them. Heck, she would even buy her food even if it's out of her way if she asks to.

 

“Nah, I’m good. I’ll just buy one after my first exam. I still have...” Dahyun checks her schedule for the day. “…one hour to recharge before going to the next one.”

 

Jeongyeon nodded. “Alright then. Goodluck!”

 

“Thanks,” Dahyun replied as she closed the car door. She waited for Jeongyeon to drive away before going inside. She’s feeling fidgety and nervous, probably from the lack of sleep.

 

As she opened the classroom door, everyone inside were still reviewing, taking advantage of every second they can use while the exam proctor isn’t around yet. She took her seat, grabbed the reviewer she wrote yesterday (and mentally praised herself for her cute drawings of models and diagrams-- she does this so she can easily remember them), and tried her best to consume as much knowledge as she can.

 

The door swung open, and the exam proctor entered. Everyone closed whatever they’re reading and kept in inside their bags. “Good morning, everyone. I’m your proctor for this examination. Today…” Dahyun completely shut her mind off for a while as the proctor explained and wrote all the necessary details they need to know on the whiteboard. She woke up from her daze when the student in front of her passed her the blank test paper.

 

_Here we go,_ Dahyun silently cheered herself on as everyone focused on answering.

 

\--

 

Shading her last answer, Dahyun checked her previous answers, looking for possible errors. After being satisfied, she stood up to pass her test sheet to the proctor. Usually she would wait for others to pass theirs first but she badly wanted to grab a cup of coffee and a sandwich. This time, she was the first one to finish.

 

“You may leave once you’re done,” the proctor reminded everyone. Hearing that, Dahyun picked her bag up and left the room. She checked her phone and tapped on a message from Chaeyoung.

 

_“Hey! Where are you? Let’s meet up and grab something before our exam! G?”_ the text reads.

 

”Sure, on my way to The Coffee Bean in a few. I’ll see you there.” She replied. She slowly walks on the sidewalk while inhaling a good amount of fresh air. Four days left, and she’s going to bid goodbye to this university. Sure, a part of her may have a feeling of hatred towards college, and the whole concept of studying with the flawed education system and all, but if she’s going to sum it up, she enjoyed college. There’s no doubting that.

 

She reached for the glass door of the café and pushed it open. Since the café is situated near the university gate, the café’s market group are mostly college students, so it’s a normal thing to see the whole café full of students studying as they take a good sip of coffee and a bite of croissant. Especially on finals week. She scanned the place thoroughly for an empty table, and quickly went to the only one that was left. She put down her bag on top of the table and took her phone out to call Chaeyoung. After a few rings, she finally picked up.

 

“Where are you?”

 

_“I’m on my way. Sorry, a classmate of mine asked a little favour.”_

 

“Okay. What do you want to buy? I’m gonna order for you while you’re not here.”

 

_“Iced Americano and a tuna sandwich please. Wait, are you treating me?”_

 

“Hell no. You’re paying me the moment your *ss arrives. Walk faster!” then she hung up.

 

She went to the counter to place their orders. After ordering a cup of hot cappuccino, chicken sandwich, and Chaeyoung’s Iced Americano and tuna sandwich, she returned to her seat and waited for their food to be served. She looked outside of the glass window, and observed the scurrying students outside. Oddly enough, she’s going to miss this kind of chaos.

 

Her silent observation was interrupted when two fingers poked the sides of her abdomen, causing her to squirm. She’s very ticklish on those spots. She turned around and there revealed Chaeyoung. She glared at her but Chaeyoung didn’t seem to mind as she took a seat on the opposite side.

 

“Did you place your order already?” Chaeyoung asked while taking her red beanie off.

 

“Yeah, I did. What took you so long?”

 

Chaeyoung sighed. “I have a classmate who forgot her I.D back in her dorm so she asked me if I can get a book for her in the library,” she replied.  

 

“How come when I asked you to get a book for me you gave me 4 different excuses?” Dahyun jeered.

 

Chaeyoung laughed. “Because she was nice. She lent me a pen and I wasn’t able to return it for a week and she told me she didn’t mind,” she recalled.

 

Dahyun scoffed. “Excuse me, I lent you my favourite pen even after you lost the previous one!”

 

“…but you weren’t nice…” Chaeyoung mumbled to herself. Unfortunately, Dahyun heard it.

 

“That’s it. You better pay me double the price of that Americano and sandwich,” she threatened.

 

Chaeyoung let out a nervous chuckle and playfully hit Dahyun’s arm. “Aish, I was just joking! And I can’t pay you double, I forgot my ATM card in my dorm. I only have a little amount of cash to get by throughout the day,” she said.

 

Their orders were served, and they stopped squabbling to silently study for their next exam. They only have about 30 minutes left, so they mustered all their focus towards their readings. Dahyun pulled the reviewer she made for this subject and wrote more information that she probably missed. On the other hand, Chaeyoung used a yellow highlighter to note the important points to take note of, which is apparently almost everything that’s written in the reading material. She nearly shaded every word in bright neon yellow.

 

Chaeyoung checked her for phone for the time. They have less than 10 minutes before the exam. She put the remaining croissant into her mouth and tapped Dahyun.

 

“10 minutes left,” she told her. Chaeyoung made a quick calculation of the time. “The building’s about 12 to 15 minutes from here if we’re going to walk, so we have to take the university shuttle to get there on time,” she concluded.

 

They quickly kept their materials inside their bag. Dahyun silently cursed herself for not taking note of the time, and for almost forgetting that their university’s relatively bigger than normal universities. Taking a quick final sip of their drinks, they rushed towards the bus stop where the shuttle’s waiting. They were able to get in just in time before it takes off. Panting, they sat at the far end of the shuttle, since it’s the only available seats left.

 

It took them 5 minutes to arrive at the nearest stop from their building. They scurried, because they know that the exam proctor is very strict, especially when it comes to time. They sighed in relief realizing that they still have 5 minutes left to walk.

 

“How many exams do you have left?” Chaeyoung asked Dahyun. While tying her hair in a bun, she answered, “I have one left today after our exam, tomorrow would be our exam in that French class, Wednesday’s my final thesis defense, Thursday’s two more exams, and Friday is the day you guys can visit my funeral.”

 

Chaeyoung pursed her lips. “Hmm, I don’t know about that. I still have two more exams today, French exam tomorrow, one more exam on Wednesday, and painting and manuscript presentation on Thursday. So I guess we’ll be both dead by Friday.”

 

Dahyun nodded. “Makes sense to me,” she replied. “But kidding aside, are you gonna go back home on Friday? Since it seems that your schedule’s gonna be over by Thursday?”

 

“I might, but I kind of wanna rest on Friday, then head out on Saturday morning. How about you?”

 

“I have to go home on Friday. My parents are coming home from their anniversary trip on Jeju, and for some reason they wanted me to come home early. They proposed about fetching me from our apartment but I assumed that they’re going to be tired from the trip so I said I’d just go home on my own.” Dahyun responded.

 

Their conversation was put into a halt when they saw the proctor entering the building. Without thinking, they sprinted towards the entrance to catch up with the proctor. They were panting when they pushed the door open. Dahyun and Chaeyoung quickly took their seats and composed themselves. The proctor entered the room seconds later.

 

“Good job,” Dahyun’s seatmate whispered.

 

“I know. Thank you,” she replied, still focusing on catching her breath.

 

The proctor locked the door, then walked towards the desk to put her things down. She wrote all the important details about the exam on the whiteboard, gave out the test papers and answer sheets.

 

“You may now start.”

 

\--

 

After a very long day, Dahyun went back to the apartment to catch some sleep before starting to study for their French exam.  She almost missed her stop earlier because she fell asleep while riding the bus. Usually she would hate it when bus drivers stop in a halt, but this time, she was thankful that she woke up because of that. She didn’t have enough extra money for fare so she couldn’t afford to miss her stop.

 

The moment she opened the apartment door, she quickly took her shoes off, dropped her bag on the floor, and plopped herself on her bed, not even minding to take off her socks and her jacket. Her bed felt extra comfortable that moment. Less than five minutes has passed and she’s already snoring.

 

Around 10 o’clock in the evening, Jeongyeon finally came from work, with a bag of dinner for her and Dahyun. She figured that Dahyun took a long nap and missed eating dinner again, and she wasn’t wrong. She put down her things on the table first before going to Dahyun’s room to wake her up.

 

“Dahyun-ah, wake up, I bought beef from Rei’s. Let’s eat,” Jeongyeon said while lightly smacking Dahyun’s butt. It was a success, as Dahyun pushed herself up to sit on the bed. Jeongyeon switched the light open before going to the kitchen to prepare their dinner. Dahyun yelped when light filled the room. Slowly opening her eyes, Dahyun stretched her body. “What time is it?” she yelled.

 

“10:15,” Jeongyeon yelled back. “Get up, eat, and then study. I bought you the one you last ordered from that beef place. You said you liked it.”

 

Seconds later, Dahyun emerged from her room and walked towards the dining table. “Thank you so much. This is one of those few moments when I really feel thankful of having you as my best friend,” she mumbled as she lightly slapped her own face to shake the drowsiness away.

 

Jeongyeon rolled her eyes. “Shut up. I don’t even know why I have you as my best friend. I feel like I’m taking care of a 5-year old kiddo at the early age of 20.”

 

Dahyun slightly chuckled. She was delighted at the sight and smell of beef in front of her. She didn’t even realize that she was hungry until then. Jeongyeon pulled a bottle of cola from the bag and poured herself a glass.

 

“So, how was your exams?” Jeongyeon asked, scooping a big portion of rice into her mouth. Dahyun sighed, suddenly pausing on eating.

 

“I don’t know. I was the first one who finished in my first exam. Usually it’s a bad thing, right? You know how they say "If you finish it quick, then you're doing it wrong"? It's like that. And I don’t even wanna think about the two other exams. There was a moment when I took a short nap because my mind got so tired of thinking. I even almost drooled on my answer sheet,” she whined. “I can’t wait for this week to be over. I’m going to be the happiest Kim Dahyun in this world.”

 

Jeongyeon laughed. “Well, you’re the only Kim Dahyun I know so far so I guess it’s possible.” She continued chewing on her beef. “By the way, when are you going home?”

 

“Oh right. Since my schedule is only up until Thursday, I have to go home as early as Friday. My parents suddenly misses me after they had an amazing alone time in Jeju for their anniversary,” she replied. “They were actually asking if you wanna come for lunch and a sleepover. From the tone of their voice over the phone, they sounded more excited for you,” she bluntly added.

 

The brown-haired girl smiled, deeply touched about how her best friend’s parents ask about her. “I would, but I have work and an important meeting to attend to on Saturday. Tell them that I miss them and their delicious kimbap.”

 

“I think they’d be happier if I give you their number and you tell them that yourself.”

 

Jeongyeon chuckled and lightly smacked Dahyun’s arm. “Id*ot. Just eat, you still have to study. You better pass all your subjects at the end of this semester or else, I’m throwing you off this apartment.”

 

Dahyun sipped her soup like she hasn’t ever tasted one before, and moaned contentedly. “Like I have a choice but to pass. If I fail even just one subject, it means I have to be here for another semester, and hell to the no.”

 

“What’s your exam for tomorrow?”

 

“French.” she nonchalantly replied.

 

“How are you doing so far? Know any other French words besides ‘je t’aime’?”

 

“So far, I have ‘pardon’ and ‘je ne sais pas’ to add on my vocabulary.”

 

“And what does those mean?”

 

  “’Sorry’ and ‘I don’t know’. I memorized those first just in case my professor calls me to answer something,” she sighed. “Damn, I’m screwed.”

 

“Then you better start studying after cleaning this up,” Jeongyeon commanded. After drinking a glass or water, she walked towards the bathroom to take a quick shower.

 

Dahyun washed the dishes quietly, her eyes half open as drowsiness slowly takes over her again. After being done with everything, she washed her face with cold water, hoping that it would do the trick to completely wake her up. She went inside her room for a towel, and stared at her reflection on the mirror. She whispered to herself as she tried her best to smile and lift her mood up.

 

“Hold on, Dahyun-ah. You’ll get there.”

 

\--

 

The last three days were a blur. Dahyun and Chaeyoung tried their best to survive the week, sending each other “encouraging” messages, which are basically “don’t be a loser”, “the one with the lower score will treat”, and others. Their friends would also cheer them in their group chats, which never failed to make them smile and continue. Their theses presentation went surprisingly well, a few revisions were noted but nothing major was pointed out. They have until next week to edit the minor changes and to send their final output.

 

They had a celebratory dinner with Jeongyeon and Momo after their exams last Thursday. Mina was not available, since she has an online meeting with her boss that night. She did congratulate them on the group chat. They vowed to only eat dinner and not to do _other stuff_ afterwards, since all of them are tired and Dahyun has to leave early the next day. Momo already promised to go on their graduation ceremony, while Jeongyeon has to check first if she can take a leave for that day. Mina, unfortunately, has a business trip to Thailand on that week. Nevertheless, they are happy that the week is finally over. They can finally have that ever-so-desirable rest and sleep.

 

After the dinner, Jeongyeon offered Chaeyoung a ride home, while Momo went home with her own car. Jeongyeon’s car was peaceful the whole ride, playing her classical playlist while the two were taking a nap. The ride was pretty fast, it only took them 20 minutes to drop Chaeyoung off then drive home to their apartment.

 

The next day, Dahyun woke up at 8 in the morning. She checked Jeongyeon’s room and it was empty. _She must’ve gone out to work already,_ she thought. Walking towards the kitchen, she found a note from Jeongyeon, saying that there’s breakfast prepared on the table and asking her to clean up a bit before going out. She ate quietly while watching ’How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days’ on their TV. All of a sudden, her phone rang—it was her mom, calling. She put her plate down and lowered the volume of the TV.

 

“Hello?”

 

_“Dahyun-ah! Our little baby, where are you now?”_ Dahyun cringed a bit the moment she heard ‘little baby’.

 

“Uhm, I’m still eating breakfast. How about you and dad? Are you guys already home?”

 

_“Yes honey, we just got home. We bought you souvenirs! Move faster and get home quick, okay? We’ll be waiting for you for lunch. I’ll cook your favourite.”_

 

Dahyun’s face lightened up. Just thinking about tasting her mom’s cooking after a long time got her energy going. “Alright! See you later! Love you!”

 

_“Okay. I love you too honey. Be careful on your way here, okay?”_

 

“Yes, mom. Bye,” and she hung up. She hurriedly finished her food up and washed the dishes, took a relatively quicker shower, and prepped herself. She wore a comfortable red graphic shirt, a pair of black jogger pants, plus a red beanie. She slipped on her Vans and picked her backpack up, taking out her phone and earphones to listen to her favourite road-trip playlist while on her way. Grabbing her pair of sunglasses on top of the dresser, she walked towards the door and left.

 

\--

 

The trip was surprisingly quick. She made it to the stop in under an hour, when she expected it to be around one and a half hour minimum. Her heart felt full as she slowly saw a view of their front porch, a gentle breeze playing along with her hair. As she arrived at the doorstep, she eagerly pressed the doorbell. The door opened and her mom greeted her warmly with a hug.

 

“Oh, Dahyun-ah! We missed you so, so much!” her mom exclaimed as she planted kisses all over her daughter’s face.

 

“Yes, mom, I’m super hyped to see you too. Now let’s get inside.” She replied. Her delight doubled up as their dog, Marbles, a brown toy poodle, ran up to her and welcomed her with such excitement, jumping up and down while continuously licking her feet to catch her attention. Dahyun picked Marbles up and showered her with love. She momentarily forgot about her mom, who’s apparently talking to her.

 

“The trip to Jeju was definitely one for the books! It may be the second best anniversary trip your dad and I ever had, right after that 3-week Maldives trip.” Her mom continued sharing their wonderful experiences over that 2-week vacation. Dahyun would’ve listened, but she missed this adorable little creature a little too much.

 

“Yeah that’s great, mom. Where’s dad, by the way?” Dahyun asked, not getting her eyes off the fluff.

 

“Upstairs, washing up. Hey, where’s Jeongyeon?” her mom asks with anticipation.

 

“She can’t come, she has to work. Jeongyeon wants me to say to you guys that she misses you and your kimbap,” Dahyun replied. A delicious smell hit her nose, her eyes immediately gleaming in joy. “Are you cooking my favourite stir-fried spicy chicken?” she squealed and ran to her mother’s side as her senses were filled with the idea of her favourite dish.

 

“Yes honey. Now take your seat, this will be finished in about a minute. Oh, here comes your dad.”

 

Dahyun glanced at the staircase, and ran to her dad to give her a hug. Her dad responded with a ruffle on her hair.

 

“Ah, I missed our little angel. How was your semester?” her father asks, who is always monitoring her studies.

 

She did okay, she thinks—well she’s still up for latin honors and her thesis presentation went great, and although her subjects were tough, she doesn’t feel worried about them. She really just feel nervous talking about her academics with her dad because he is very strict when it comes to studying. The pressure is real for Dahyun on the academic field—her mom graduated cum laude from Seoul National University with a degree in Humanities, while her dad graduated from Yonsei University with a Masters’ degree in Communication Arts. Both of her parents’ family of orientation had good reputations in the academe. She’s an only child, so she had no choice but to bear the weight of continuing the academic excellence throughout their family.

 

“It was okay, I guess. Well, I’m still a candidate for latin honors based on my last semester’s GPA so far. My thesis presentation went pretty smooth, although the panel asked me to revise some minor parts. My exams went well too, or so I hope.”

 

Her father nodded in content. “Alright. Now honey, I know you’ve been under loads of stress and pressure in your entire college life. It has been tough, but you showed us that you are tougher, and for that, I’m deeply proud of. Now don’t think about the exam results anymore. We all know you’ve worked hard.”

 

Her father smiled at her affectionately and patted her on the head. Dahyun was moved by her father’s unexpected words, and just before she could hold back, she hugged her father tightly and buried her face on her father’s chest, tears streaming down her eyes. Her father understood, and hugged her back in silence. Her mom joined in right after. They all laughed as Marbles tried to get inside their feet, like she wants to get in to the hug too. Dahyun picked Marbles up to pet her.

 

“Thank you so much, for understanding. It means so much to me,” Dahyun managed to say while wiping her tears off her cheek with her free hand.

 

Her mom ran her fingers through Dahyun’s hair and planted a kiss on her forehead. “Baby, of course we do. We’ve been there too.”

 

“Before all of us tears up,” her dad fished a tiny box from his pocket and handed it over to Dahyun. “Happy graduation.”

 

Dahyun put Marbles down for a moment and opened the box with trembling hands. She was flabbergasted with what she saw. Her father smiled and spoke up.

 

“So, how would you like to drive us in your new car?”

 

Dahyun doesn’t know how to react. Her parents led her way onto the garage, and there it was, the bad boy painted in matte black, with upgraded wheels and headlights.

 

“Oh my god. This can’t be real.” Her mouth was open the whole time. She told her dad about this model before, and she can’t even believe that her dad still remembers that.

 

“Can I drive it? Can I drive it?” her tone was filled with enthusiasm.

 

“After we eat, honey. Lunch is already prepared. C’mon,” her mom opened her arms and Dahyun ran towards her like a kid. While still talking about the car, the three of them went inside.

 

The lunch was very fulfilling, not only to their stomachs, but also to their bond as a family. Each of them has been very busy for the past months, and this was the first time they’ve actually talked about anything for months. Dahyun put all her worries at the back of her mind, and enjoyed the rest of the day with her loving parents.

 

\--

 

In an airplane suspended high up in the air, a brown-haired woman grumbled in her seat.

 

She hates airplane rides. She doesn’t know if she’s just unlucky at getting her seat because 85% of the time she would end up sitting beside someone who probably doesn’t know that deodorants actually exist and is available at every grocery store. If ever she finds a seat that she _actually_ likes, there would always be families who would ask to switch seats (and she's too nice to say no), different kinds of fast food smell in the air, snoring—she _hated_ all of them.

 

As soon as she gets off the plane, she breathed in a good amount of fresh air. Her respiratory tract deserved that at least, for keeping up with the mixture of god-knows-whatever's-that-odor inside. After passing through security, she treads towards the arrival area. A lot of people with their own banners were at the waiting section, and she felt a tad bit jealous of the other passengers being greeted with excitement. She thought of contacting her friends to fetch her too but she wanted her arrival to be a surprise.

 

The brown-haired girl ran her fingers through her locks, trying to keep her hair from being ruined by the wind. As the cab drove down to fetch her, she took off her sunglasses and sighed in contentment.

 

“It’s been a while.”


	5. Goodbye, Hello

It was a fine Saturday. The whole campus has been peacefully quiet ever since the vacation started. But today, as the graduation venue gradually gets filled up by people, the campus gets intruded by different kinds of noise, mostly uproar from different students who cannot contain their excitement over _finally_ being able to graduate.

 

Typically, graduation ceremonies are done inside a hall or auditorium, but this time, the university’s administration decided to set it up on their expansive open field. They have over 4,000 graduation candidates from different courses and programs this year, and there are no limits on the number of guests per graduating student (although there’s only 2 tickets allowed for the people who will accompany the candidate on stage, other guests can watch from outside the seating area), so they would need a bigger venue to cater the possible volume of people. No one would like being cramped in a hall and be all sweaty in such joyous event.

 

Dahyun and her parents arrived relatively earlier than others. The ceremony will start at 4 o’clock in the afternoon, and they managed to arrive at 3. The last thing they’d hate is to get stuck in traffic, and they don’t want to dampen their jubilant mood with that. They picked the nearest parking space in the venue. Dahyun was feeling ecstatic for two different reasons—her graduation and the fact that her parents agreed to be the one to drive them to the university with her new car. The three alighted the car after being parked.

 

“Dahyun-ah, we’re gonna go to the convenience store to buy food. Do you want anything?” her dad called, taking in the view of his alma mater. It’s been a while since he visited the university, and it still never fails to leave him in awe.

 

“No, I’m good. I’ll stay here and wait for my friends,” she replied, her attention glued on her phone. She got two missed calls from Jeongyeon just 10 minutes ago. Her phone was on silent since she doesn’t want to bother by it ringing while she’s driving, so she didn’t hear. She tapped her name and called back.

 

 _“Hello?”_ Jeongyeon answered. Dahyun can hear loud music being played in the background, but is slowly being minimized.

 

“Hey. Sorry for missing your calls earlier. Are you already on your way?”

 

_“Yeah, just heading to a gas station to refill my tank and I’ll go straight in there. Are the others there already?”_

“Nope. Just me and my parents. I’m gonna call Chaeyoung after.”

 

_“Alright. Where did you park? So I can park just near yours. And congratulations on the new car, by the way. Sweet.”_

“Thanks. I’m parked in the Underwood Student Dorm’s parking area. My car’s the only matte black in here so you can easily identify it.”

 

 _“Matte black? That’s sexy. Your dad’s got the taste,”_ They both chuckled. _“Anyway, noted. I’ll be there in about 15 minutes or so. See ya!”_

“Alright. See you,” and she hung up. She looked up for Chaeyoung’s number right after. After a lot of rings, she didn’t answer. _Probably taking a nap in the car again,_ Dahyun thought.

 

She opened her car door and started the engine so she could play some music. The speakers didn’t fail to meet her expectations. The bass reverberates through her soul, and just when she thought she couldn’t love the automobile more, it just surprises her with more splendid features as she explores it. She relaxingly sat on the driver’s seat, adjusting the seat’s level to a slightly lower position so she can lie down for a bit. While ‘Sweater Weather’ by The Neighbourhood plays in the background, she started to reminisce.

 

It felt like déjà vu. There are lots of times when they would drive inside the campus on the wee hours of the night to do a little unwinding from all the stress brought by, _surprise surprise,_ studying. Sometimes it’s planned, but most of the time it’s spontaneous. They would bring a couple of beer cans with them and drive to a secluded place away from the resident dorms, where they can drink and smoke in peace while listening to music. Momo would usually drive with Mina, Sana, and Dahyun on her blue convertible, while Jeongyeon, Nayeon, and Chaeyoung would ride with Jihyo on her silver pick-up truck. They are the only ones with cars that time, and the good thing is both are stargazing-friendly. There may have been a few times where they would get high (usually it was Nayeon who’d bring them good _stuff_ ), but after the incident where they were _almost_ caught by rounding university guards, they unanimously agreed not to do it anymore. At least not inside the university, that is.

 

Her reminiscing moment was disturbed when her parents came back from the convenience store, both holding and munching on a hotdog sandwich.

 

“Where are your other friends?” her mom asked before taking a sip of her mango shake.

 

“Jeongyeon’s on her way. She’ll be here in around 5 minutes. My other friends haven’t texted me yet,” she replied while looking out on the road, searching for her friend’s car. The parking spaces got taken up one by one quickly as more people started to arrive. Just before she could dial her number again, she saw a familiar car entering the parking lot. She waved her hands up in the air and Jeongyeon successfully saw her, and expertly parked on the side of her car. Jeongyeon stopped the engine and went out, and went directly to Mr. and Mrs. Kim to greet them.

 

“Pleasure to meet you again, Mr. and Mrs. Kim,” Jeongyeon said while bowing to them as to show respect.

 

“Aigoo, this kind kid!” Mrs. Kim initiates a warm hug, followed by a pat in the back by Mr. Kim. Dahyun choked at the comment. “How are you doing at work?”

 

“Mostly good, although stressful, but rewarding,” Jeongyeon explained. Her parents continued chatting with Jeongyeon, asking about her work, Dahyun’s attitude towards studying (which elicited a snicker from Dahyun when Jeongyeon _praised_ her, then exchanging looks afterwards), when she’s gonna visit the Kim household again, and even her love life. She was about to participate in the conversation the moment it was brought up, but the ringing of her phone made it impossible. Chaeyoung was calling.

 

“Hello?”

 

_“Hey! Are you guys already at the venue? We’re looking for a vacant parking spot right now.”_

“Jeongyeon’s already here. There’s a vacant on our opposite side, come to Underwood Student Dorm parking lot quick. I’m not gonna stand there to save you a spot.”

 

_“Alright, coming! Bye!”_

Dahyun hung up. She went back on chatting with Jeongyeon and her parents. Minutes later, Chaeyoung arrived along with her parents. Dahyun introduced Chaeyoung again to her parents, just in case they forgot already. Jeongyeon and Dahyun bowed and greeted Mr. and Mrs. Son, then the parents exchanged greetings and started chatting, leaving the three young ‘adults’ behind.

 

“Where’s Momo? Did she text you guys yet? There’s roughly 30 minutes left before the ceremony starts,” Jeongyeon looked around for a possible sign of a familiar blonde hair.

 

“Go text her Chaeyoung, I need to retouch my make-up for a while,” Dahyun told the short-haired girl. Chaeyoung grabs her phone from her pocket and unlocked it to text Momo. While she was sending a message, Jeongyeon squealed out of nowhere and ran towards something. Chaeyoung and Dahyun instinctively looked up, and there revealed the ever-so-busy-with-her-masters, Im Nayeon.

 

“Nabongs!” Chaeyoung screamed in excitement and ran towards them. Jeongyeon was already hugging Nayeon too tight, it supplied enough hugs for Nayeon for a whole year.

 

“You rascal, why did you appear just now? It’s been a month since you last talked to us! What kind of friend are you?!”

 

Nayeon chuckled and hugged Jeongyeon back. The two broke the hug when Chaeyoung and Dahyun came. The two gave Nayeon a less-excited hug compared to Jeongyeon’s, since they occasionally see her around campus anyway.

 

“I’m so sorry guys. Graduate school’s such a pain in the *ss, I swear. My daily life has just been class, study, and occasional naps, to be honest,” Nayeon explained. “I barely even go online. But you still love me, right?” she added while making a cute face. Dahyun snickered and pushed Nayeon’s face.

 

“Of course, st*pid. You need to earn your masters and feed us well after getting a great paying job,” Dahyun said. The other two nodded in agreement.

 

Out of all the people in their circle, only Nayeon decided to pursue a Master’s degree, mainly because it’s her parent’s wish and she’s a bit passionate about her course as well. Biology has always been her thing ever since her high school days. It’s the only subject that really piqued her interest, and she understood it the most compared to her other subjects. She could’ve gotten into a medical school and train to be a doctor if she wanted to, but she fancied herself to be a laboratory kind of person in a white laboratory gown, so she majored in microbiology. Mina also planned to take her Master’s, but after their graduation, multiple job offers were knocking on their doors. And since Mina wanted to stay in Korea with Momo, they decided to have jobs and just occasionally visit their families in Japan. Dahyun and Chaeyoung haven’t thought of it yet, since their major goal as of this point is to _graduate_.

 

“Whatever. Hey, I heard you’re graduating cum laude. How true is this?”

 

“Yeah. Surprising, right?”

 

Nayeon pretended to be shocked and joked. “How much did you pay your professors? I didn’t know they accept bribes.”

 

“Stop acting like an innocent, pure soul. No one’s gonna buy it. And why are you asking me? You used to do it, so you should already know that, right?” Dahyun’s clapback earned ‘oohs’ and laughter from the three. While continuing their little banter, an announcement was heard from the stage saying that all candidates for graduation and their guests should go to their respectful seats and settle down, since the ceremony’s about to start in five minutes. Nayeon bowed and greeted Dahyun and Chaeyoung’s parents when they came up to their group. They started walking towards the seats.

 

“Did Momo reply to your text, Chaeng?” Dahyun asked, looking around for a possible familiar blonde girl. Chaeyoung checked her phone and there was an unread message.

 

**_Momoring_ ** _(3:45) : Sorry, something came up. I might be late but I’ll be there._

“She said something came up so she’ll be late,” Chaeyoung replied. “She didn’t say what, but she said that she’ll catch up.”

 

The rest nodded in acknowledgement. “Nayeon and I will just wait for her here. Go march for your diplomas like you guys are the baddest b*tch in town!” Jeongyeon exclaimed. The three widened her eyes at looked at her for saying the ‘B’ word. Their parents didn’t seem to hear it though, so Jeongyeon was safe. Nayeon brought her hand up and hit Jeongyeon at the back of her head.

 

“Sorry. Just proud.”

 

\--

 

The candidates’ seats are divided by colleges, and are further sorted out by courses. Dahyun and Chaeyoung are from different colleges (Dahyun’s from the College of Business and Economics while Chaeyoung’s from the College of Liberal Arts) so they were far apart from each other. But since there are no announcement of prohibiting gadget usage in the middle of ceremony, they spent most of the time just talking on their group chat.

 

**_DJ Dubu_ ** _: I’m feeling a bit hot because of this thick graduation gown. My armpits are sweating._

**_Chaeng_ ** _: Agree! My armpits are flooding too! I want to put tissues on each but I don’t know how to do it without looking weird._

**_Nabongs_ ** _: Let’s have a game. After the ceremony, the one with the sweatier armpits will stick her armpit to the loser’s nose for one minute. G?_

**_DJ Dubu_ ** _: That’s f*cking gross, Nabongs._

**_Chaeng_ ** _: G! G! DON’T BE SUCH A LOSER DAHYUN_

**_DJ Dubu_ ** _: That’s unfair! Chaeyoung sweats more than me! Weren’t you aware about how active her sweat glands are during our PE classes together?!_

**_Nabongs_ ** _: I gotta back up Dahyun with that. I still remember the day you attacked me with a hug when I saw you jogging around the field. You looked like you just swam all throughout the Pacific Ocean. I did not appreciate the hug, btw. –Jeong_

**_Chaeng_ ** _: Stop ganging up on me. It’s not my fault that my sweat glands get excited most of the time. Why are you using Nayeon’s phone anyway?_

**_Nabongs_ ** _: My phone died. I forgot to charge it last night. Just gonna charge later inside the car. –Jeong_

**_DJ Dubu_ ** _: SOMEONE JUST FARTED IN OUR AREA WTF IT SMELLS LIKE A REFRIGERATOR LEFT UNPLUGGED FOR MONTHS UGH IM GONNA BARF_

**_Nabongs_ ** _: As bad as Jeongyeon’s?_

**_DJ Dubu_ ** _: IT’S EVEN WORSE!_

**_Nabongs_ ** _: Oh wow. I never thought that there’s actually someone who can compete with Jeongyeon’s fart power._

**_Nabongs_ ** _: HELP JEONGYEON’S HARASSING ME_

**_Chaeng_ ** _: Your fault not ours_

While Dahyun was preoccupied by thinking of ways to possibly not breathe in the awful smell by only-god-knows-who, the ushers called their row to stand and go beside the stage with their parents. Dahyun thanked every deity she know for she can breathe fully again. She was suspecting that the culprit was from the row in front of them. She met up with her parents at the side of the stage, telling them the 5-minute hell she went through. As her name was called, she took in a deep breath, and beamed in happiness.

 

_This is it._

_\--_

After hitting Nayeon for the nth time, Jeongyeon momentarily stopped so they can cheer for Dahyun while she receives her diploma. While waiting for Dahyun’s name to be called, someone tapped their shoulders.

 

“Yo. Sorry I’m late,” Momo creeped behind them. “Hey Nabongs! It’s been a while!” she added.

 

Nayeon smiled and gave her a hug. “Yeah, graduate school got me so occupied. How’s things?”

 

“Oh, we have lots of things to catch up on. Maybe we all can hang out after the graduation if you guys are up for it,” Momo replied. The two nodded in agreement.

 

“And, uh, guys, someone’s going to join us,” she added. Nayeon and Jeongyeon can hear the excitement in her tone. This must be the reason why she was late.

 

“Who is it, Momoring? This better be worthy because Dahyun’s about to—“ Jeongyeon wasn’t able to continue whatever she was saying when she saw _someone_ behind Momo. Nayeon gasped, and was momentarily in shock just like Jeongyeon. After recovering, she ran towards the brown-haired girl.

 

“SANA!”

 

Sana beamed at the excited girl running towards her. She opened her arms to greet her with a warm hug, but they almost fell down when Nayeon finally collided into Sana’s body. Good thing Sana kinda worked out to improve her balance, and it’s much better now than before.

 

“I missed you so much, you little b*tch! I haven’t seen you in like forever!” Nayeon exaggerated. After getting their own jobs, all of them became sufficiently busy. They would hang out on some certain less-stressful days, until Sana got promoted and became busier than usual. She literally had no time with anything other than working, eating, and sleeping. Even her phone inbox was full of work-related messages.

 

“Aww. I missed you guys so much too. I have some presents for you all from Taiwan. I left them in my apartment though,” Sana replied. Nayeon’s face gleamed with anticipation. Who wouldn’t like to be given gifts, right?

 

While the two walked towards Jeongyeon and Momo, Sana chortled because of Jeongyeon’s astounded face.

 

“Look who got resurrected from the dead! Holy sh*t, I missed you!” Jeongyeon tackled Sana and head-locked her while intensely ruffling her brown locks.

 

“Yeah, I could tell by the way you’re ruining my hairstyle,” Sana voiced while trying her best to get out of Jeongyeon’s arms, but to no avail.

 

The group stopped their conversation momentarily as they heard the MC announce Dahyun’s name. The group screamed and cheered while flailing wildly for the girl on stage, hoping that Dahyun could see them. Sana stood behind them, lightly clapping. She smiled the moment she saw her receive her hardly-earned medal and diploma.

 

_I’m so proud of you, Dahyun-ah._

\--

 

Dahyun bowed to the presenters of medals and diploma along with her parents. While she was receiving her awards, she looked towards the source of noise on her right, which she later on identified as her friends. And a brown-haired girl. After waving at them, she stared intently at the girl they are with, and she froze when the girl stared back.

 

Those eyes are familiar.

 

_Too. F*cking. Familiar._

 

She redirected her gaze and blinked a couple of times when the girl smiled at her. Was she daydreaming? This couldn’t be true, right?

 

She snapped out of her thoughts when her mom tapped her shoulders and pointed to the camera in front. “Smile, honey,” her mom whispered. She plastered a smile on her face, silently hoping that it didn't look too forced. Her smile looked convincing enough, but she was still baffled inside. After the pictures were taken, she looked back at her friends’ spot. _She’s still there._

 

She walked down the stairs with her parents, and treaded towards her seat. After taking her seat, she paused and closed her eyes for a while. _Compose yourself, Dahyun. Breathe._

 

A big part of her really wished that whatever she saw was just an illusion, or some kind of trickery her f*cked up mind’s trying to pull on her, while she tried to stop that weird feeling that’s creeping out of her heart.

 

\--

 

The ceremony nearly comes to an end. After hearing the closing remarks from the University President, they all stood up to sing their university’s anthem. Many students became so emotional by then, probably overwhelmed by the thought of singing the anthem for the last time as students. Some started sobbing while trying their best to continue to sing along, while others just silently wished for the song to end early so they can go home and celebrate. Dahyun is neither.

 

She tried her best not to let it bother her, at least just for this event. This event is a big milestone for her, a huge moment in her life, and it is worth celebrating. She looked forward for this event for weeks and now, because of a certain _someone,_ she doesn’t feel as gleeful as before.

 

_Why now? Of all the times that she could pick to show up, why now?_

 

The anthem finally finished, and the MCs started to wrap up the event. Unable to compose herself anymore, she pulled her phone from her pocket and texted Jeongyeon.

 

**_Dubu_ ** _(7:04)_ _: Jeongyeon, meet me in front of the Student’s Union Building ASAP._

****

She cursed under her breath when she remembered that Jeongyeon’s phone was off, so she texted Momo instead.

 

**_Dubu_ ** _(7:06) :_ _Momoring, can you please tell Jeongyeon to meet me in front of the Student’s Union Building? Tell her it’s urgent. Thank you._

**_Momoring_ ** _(7:08)_ _: Alright. She’s on her way. U okay?_

**_Dubu_ ** _(7:09)_ _: Yeah, of course. :) just have to talk to her abt something._

**_Momoring_ ** _(7:10)_ _: Alright. Congrats Dubu! Love u!_

She scampered towards the said meeting place. Jeongyeon was already there waiting for her while munching on a snack she stole from Momo. She saw Dahyun and waved at her, and opened her arms to congratulate her with a hug.

 

“There’s our sweetie! I’m so proud of you—“

 

“Why is she here?” Dahyun questioned, a stern look evident in her face.

 

Jeongyeon swallowed whatever’s she’s chewing and looked at her with confusion. “Who’s here? I’m the only one here, Dahyun.”

 

“Sana. Did you know that she was coming?”

 

Jeongyeon felt stupid the moment she realized what Dahyun’s talking about. “So you saw her.”

 

“You didn’t answer my question.”

 

“No, I didn’t. We were all surprised too. Why?” She felt stupid again for asking why when she already knew the reason. “Actually, don’t answer that.”

 

Dahyun stayed quiet for a while and took a deep breath, trying to find composure. Jeongyeon just let her think on her own, because knowing Dahyun, she wouldn’t need soothing words, she’d figure how to calm herself down on her own.

 

“Dahyun, the gang’s planning to have an after-party later. I think it would be better if you don’t come if she still bothers you that much.”

 

Dahyun didn’t respond. Jeongyeon sighed. She should’ve seen this coming. Yeah, Dahyun could’ve denied everything related to Sana for the past months, but still, she should’ve expected this. _Such a stupid bestfriend. That’s what I am right now,_ she told herself. She looked up to Dahyun when the girl cleared her throat.

 

“No, I’ll go. I don’t want it to look like a big deal. It’s not, anyway. It shouldn’t.”

 

As much as Jeongyeon wanted to smack Dahyun for such bad decision right there, she couldn’t really just restrict Dahyun from doing what she thinks is the right thing to do. She believes that Dahyun is mature enough to handle things like these on her own, and in reality, her job as a best friend is to just be there, whether she needs her or not. Jeongyeon sighed and replied. “Okay, if that’s what you want.”

 

“Let’s go. They’re probably waiting for us there already.” Dahyun grabbed Jeongyeon’s hands as they walked towards the parking lot. Jeongyeon stopped for a while and whispered.

 

“If ever things doesn’t go the way you wanted them, just remember that I’m there with you, okay?” she gave Dahyun a warm smile and a pat on the head before walking again. 

 

\--

 

Treading towards the parking lot, they finally spotted the gang. Dahyun saw her again, and even though she knows she couldn’t look at her just yet, she tried to remain as composed and normal. She put on a smile as she was welcomed by the warm congratulatory messages from them. The atmosphere became a little bit awkward when the two arrived, but they just brushed it off. She tried to act natural while expertly avoiding eye contact with Sana. Chaeyoung was inside their family’s car, taking off her graduation gown and cap and changing from heels into sneakers.

 

“So, what’s the plan tonight?” Nayeon asked, already anticipating. It’s been a month since she got wasted. She’s gonna let loose tonight and no one’s going to stop her.

 

“Anyone up for a karaoke night? I can reserve us a good noraebang place just 30 minutes from here. We can eat our dinner there too,” Momo suggested. Everyone cheered in agreement. While walking towards the car, Dahyun felt a tap on her shoulder. She glanced at her back and she halted.

 

 _F*ck_.

 

“Hey,” Sana mumbled. She handed out a bouquet of stargazers, Dahyun’s favourite flower. “I, uh, remembered promising you to give you these. Congratulations on your graduation, Dahyun-ah.”

 

Dahyun smiled, and received the flowers politely. Yeah, she does remember. That one time when Sana bought her flowers but she can’t find some stargazers so she bought tulips instead, and promised her that she’ll give her stargazers next time. Yes, she still remembers.

 

She cursed at herself as her heartbeat’s pace became quick for some reasons she doesn't know yet.  _Stop, goddamnit._

 

“Thanks," she managed to reply before turning away to stride towards her parents. She carefully asked permission if she can celebrate with her friends. While they were talking, Mrs. Kim saw Sana and called her. Sana, feeling surprised, hesitatingly came forward.

 

“Omona! Sana! It’s been so long since we last saw you!” Sana bowed and exchanged greetings with Dahyun’s parents. She was slightly taken aback when Mrs. Kim initiated a hug, but she hugged back anyway.

 

“It’s very nice to meet you again, Mr. and Mrs. Kim. Are you doing well?”

 

“Of course, of course! Especially when our Dahyun here just finished college,” Mrs. Kim gleefully replied. “Are you going with them for the after-party?”

 

“Yes, ma’am.”

 

Mrs. Kim nodded in acknowledgement. “Good. Please watch over our Dahyun, we know she’s been drinking although she hasn’t told us yet,” Mr. and Mrs. Kim chuckled, earning a scoff from Dahyun. Sana instinctively looked at Dahyun to see if she’s okay with it.

 

“Unbelievable,” Dahyun mumbled.

 

“Of course, Mrs. Kim. All of us will be looking after our newly graduates,” Sana reassures.

 

“Alright. Give me your keys honey, we’re gonna use your car to drive home. Enjoy the night, but be responsible towards drinking, okay?” Mr. Kim reminded as Dahyun handed her keys over. They bid their last goodbyes before going inside the car and driving away.

 

Momo called out the two to come over. “Alright. So Chaeyoung and Dahyun will go with Jeongyeon, and Nayeon and Sana will go with me. I already told Jeongyeon the place, and we’ll just meet there. Alright?” everyone nodded. They went inside their respective cars and settled themselves. Dahyun tried to relax her hands-- she didn't notice that she'd been gripping too hard since earlier. She closed her eyes and sighed.

 

_This is going to be a long night._


	6. Worse Than Nicotine

If there’s something Sana’s known and proud about, it’s her confidence and optimism. She’s learned how to trust and believe in herself, something most people has a hard time doing. _You should always be the one who’d believe in yourself first before anyone else,_ she would always say with a smile. Whatever she does, she does smoothly and precisely. She has a good sense of decision-making, that’s why she was always picked to run for class president or be the group representative, from middle school up to college. She managed to be a consistent ‘It-girl’ on every school she’s been into. She’d always look for the brighter side of things, and sees the good in people no matter how awful they come off to be. This personality of hers rarely gets shaken up.

 

This may be one of those ‘rare’ moments.

 

“Don’t you think that it’s a bad idea for me to go?”

 

Sana looked outside the window, her face painted with concern. Momo and Nayeon took a pause from their continuous 15-minute chat, which consisted of the usual topics about work and academe, to random ‘how are leads inserted in pencils’ and something about bacteria and eyelids. She would occasionally participate in the conversation, but Sana wasn’t really in the mood to be all chitty-chatty about anything peculiar right now. Out-of-the-world conversations and topics are her thing, she’s actually the one who’d always initiate those kinds of chats, but as much as she wanted to hide it, something is bothering her—she felt worried that she might be ruining something because of her presence.

 

Momo looked at her ridiculously. “Are you joking? Of course it isn’t. Why would you even ask that? All of us missed spending quality time with you!” she responded.

 

“ _All_? You sure about that? Because I don’t think so,” Sana sighed. “I… don’t you think that I might’ve picked a wrong time to come back?” she mumbled.

 

“Is this about Dahyun?”

 

Sana didn’t reply, which is clearly a ‘yes’.

 

“Oh come on. It’s been almost two and a half years now. It’s not that great of a deal as it was before. I’m sure you two would be just fine. Both of you are one of my closest friends in this earth so I know that you’re both mature adults that know how to handle whatever there is to handle. Don’t worry too much,” the blonde girl reassured, patting the other girl’s shoulders who’s sitting on the opposite seat. “Besides, how long are you gonna let that hold you back from us?” Sana looked at Momo, contemplating if she should trust her words, and exhaled deeply.

 

“You’re right, I might just be overthinking this,” she said while massaging her temple. “Thanks, Momoring. This is probably just caused by stress from work.”

 

Nayeon chuckled from behind and ruffled Sana’s hair. “Exactly why you need this. You need to chill and relax, Sana,” she replied, leaning forward to turn the radio’s volume up for a bit. “Also, we missed seeing the drunk you.”

 

Sana glared at her friend who in return just gave her a toothy grin. As the discussions died down, Nayeon fell asleep while playing games on her phone, Momo focused on driving and watching the road, and Sana was left convincing herself on and on that whatever happens, this too shall pass.

 

\--

 

One of the things that Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung have learned from their years of friendship with Dahyun is that she chooses to play those songs with lots of power notes and sing along with them whenever she’s nervous or upset. It’s like her way of releasing stress, especially when she starts screa—hitting the highest notes. As Dahyun’s ever very supportive friends, they didn’t do anything to stop her from pouring her feelings out, but with them cramped in a little space called Jeongyeon’s car, it might not be possible for their ears to survive another round of endless noise once they start their noraebang later. Jeongyeon’s eyes squinted when she heard a little cracking sound from her right ear. If she only knew that it will end up like this, she should’ve let Chaeyoung sit beside her instead. Although she thinks that it wouldn’t make much of a difference anyway.

 

Chaeyoung fished out her phone from her pocket and put on her noise-cancelling earphones so she can restrict herself from pulling her own hair. She played something with light beats and soothing melodies, but even with maximized volume, she can still hear Dahyun’s unholy singing. _So much for noise-cancelling technology. I can’t believe this has cost me a week worth of allowance,_ she thought. At least it lessened all other possible damage her ears could get.

 

Jeongyeon, on the other hand, had her face scrunched up the whole ride. There were times that Dahyun would purposely _sing_ closer to her ears, like she’s urging her to sing along, but it’s not hyping her up, not when her cochlea’s about to get destroyed. If she isn’t going to win ‘Best friend of the Year’ award with what Dahyun’s putting her through, then she’s gonna run over everyone who thinks she doesn’t deserve it because she f*cking deserve every piece of it. She’s gonna snatch that award, sell it to the pawnshop, and use the money for ear treatment.

 

This was their whole ride.

 

She can shout at Dahyun if she’d like to (and oh, she really wanted to), but this time, she’s gonna bank it for a while.

 

As they reach the place Momo scouted, Jeongyeon immediately dropped them off in front of the establishment, massaging her ears while looking for a good parking spot. Momo’s group came just minutes later. After parking, they went inside the noraebang place. Momo spoke to the receptionist about the room they’ve reserved about an hour before, and the receptionist hastily assisted them inside. Everyone released mixed reactions of amazement while checking the room out—it had lots of space, is well-polished, and looks so freaking expensive. They didn’t know that a noraebang place like this actually exists.

 

“How come we didn’t know about this? This noraebang place is a game-changer!” Jeongyeon exclaimed. Her jaw is still hanging while she’s having a good scan of the room. There were red comfortable couches, a long coffee table in between, a relatively bigger flat screen TV, and two huge speakers. Just when they thought it can’t get any better, there was a sliding door hidden behind the curtain, leading to a dining room with a glossy, minimalist rectangular table, surrounded by six modern-styled chairs. The room’s lighting was just exact to their liking—not too bright, yet not too dim.  

 

Everyone took their own chairs and settled down. Dahyun, who just came from the restroom to remove her makeup, was left with one empty seat—beside Sana. She calmly walked towards the empty seat and sat down, trying to act as cool as possible while tapping on the table rhythmically. Jeongyeon looked at her, as if trying to communicate telepathically.

 

_“You good there?”_

Dahyun tugged a smile and slightly nodded in reassurance. Jeongyeon smiled back and reverted her gaze towards the stacks of menu that the receptionist was holding. The woman started distributing it to them before leaving the room.

 

“Would you like us to send you two pitchers of lemon water while you’re deciding, ma’am?” the receptionist politely asked Momo.

 

“Yeah, yeah, sure. We’ll place our orders when it arrives,” she replied. The receptionist bowed and walked towards the door and slowly shut it close.

 

“Seriously, how long has this been here? I’ve never heard of this place. And based on the aesthetics of it and its proximity towards the university, it should’ve been famous with students by now,” Jeongyeon further probed. Momo, without looking up from the menu, spoke.

 

“It just opened weeks ago. Still new, but already attracting lots of customers, from students to businesspersons.”

 

Jeongyeon nodded in response. “How’d you know about this place then?” Internet?” she further added.

 

Momo, having finally decided on her dish, looked up and replied with a smile. “This is my uncle’s. Now, before you all rejoice for the idea of free dinner and drinks, my uncle just gave me a 30% discount on our expenses later. This is the most expensive room that they have here, but I already talked my uncle into it and he agreed to give the room rental for free. He said that it’s his graduation gift for Chaeng and Dubu.”

 

Everyone clapped and cheered, with Jeongyeon raising Momo’s arms while shouting “here’s the real champion!”. They continued searching through the menu, searching for dishes they’d find appetizing. Momo recommended some of the place’s top sellers, and she seemed reliable enough so everyone decided to try her suggestions first.

 

“Since this is a celebration for Dubu and Chaeng’s graduation, I say that the working people pay for the whole night!” Nayeon exclaimed. “And since I’m the only student remaining here, I’m out of the list.”

 

Momo already contributed a lot already, which leaves Jeongyeon and Sana. The short-haired one retorted. “Stop acting like that’s a valid reason to freeload, Nabongs. Go pass your exams and graduate first, and until then, your sorry *ss is still paying!” Sana excessively nods in agreement, standing up and reaches for Jeongyeon across the table for a high-five. Nayeon sighs in defeat.

 

“Fine. Only because I love these two children.”

 

Dahyun and Chaeyoung sharply turned towards Nayeon and bellowed, “We’re not kids anymore!”

 

Nayeon chuckled, reached for their cheeks and pinched, “I know, but you’re still our wittle babies,” she cooed. Dahyun immediately swatted Nayeon’s hand in annoyance and glared. “Okay, okay, I’m just joking.”

 

A waitress quietly entered the room, with two filled glass pitchers on both hands. Sana immediately stood up to help the woman, in which the lady first hesitated, but Sana persisted anyway. The waitress proceeded to listing their orders up. After that, the woman smiled in return for Sana’s kind gesture before bowing and leaving the room. The room became awfully quiet. Sana glanced around to see Momo, Jeongyeon, and Nayeon giving her a malicious stare and smirk. She returned their gazes with a confused look.

 

“What?”

 

“That girl’s pretty, huh?” Momo started.

 

“…so?”

 

“You didn’t even deny it,” Nayeon pitched in, grinning annoyingly.

 

“The way she smiled back at you was something. I’m sensing a little bit of heat,” Jeongyeon added further.

 

Sana scoffed. She may have a reputation for being ‘good with girls’ and for being a ‘smooth talker’, but that doesn’t mean her every gesture she make towards women has to be mixed with a hint of flirtation. “Are you guys seriously gonna gang up on me for a simple kind gesture? Geez.” She argued.

 

“Simple kind gesture. Sure, sure,” Momo teased even more. The room was filled with laughter, even Dahyun couldn’t resist to smirk.

 

Sana responded with a mocking “ha-ha”. Knowing that there’s no way she’s gonna win over these bunch of *ssholes, she gave up and rolled her eyes instead.

 

After their little banter, they started talking about their jobs and the adult life (with Chaeyoung and Dahyun listening intently, picking up on things they think they might use the moment they step into the real world). The topics were mostly about the usual office rants (like how to deal with your annoying officemates, how not to smack your boss in the face, etc.), weird work experiences, comparing each other’s job benefits and salary, and many more. Dahyun had a little bit of an idea with what they’re talking about sometimes, since there are lots of times when Jeongyeon would come home and try to talk to her about these stuff.  

 

Everyone turned their heads towards the door when it opened, delight filling up their senses when three trays full of food came in sight. In a blink of an eye, the table was occupied with different dishes of different kinds. As if a holy angel just passed, the room was silent in an instant when they started scarfing food down their throats. They ate for a good 20 minutes.

 

For Dahyun, it felt like a year.

 

The table wasn’t exactly big and long enough for them to have an appropriate space to move freely, resulting into hers and Sana’s arm to brush off each other. Multiple times. Even Sana noticed it too—and she felt just as uncomfortable about it as her. Dahyun tried moving her chair a bit farther, but her legs were already pressed against the table’s frame. They’re both aware of the awkward tension between them so they just did their best to narrow down their arm movements.

 

They looked obviously st*pid though, or at least to Chaeyoung, who was sitting across them. It looked like their armpits were glued or something. She wanted to call them out just for the laughs, but decided not to when she observed their faces. Gulping half a glass of water down, Chaeyoung just shrugged it off and stood up as she was the first one to finish.

 

“Hey guys, did we order the drinks already?”

 

“Oh, not yet. You and Dubu go down there and decide on it. We’ll drink whatever you want to drink,” Momo replied, her mouth still half full. She may have spat a grain of rice onto Jeongyeon’s face, in which was returned by a deadly glare from the latter. Momo just smiled awkwardly and took it off Jeongyeon’s cheek.

 

“But she’s still eating—“

 

“No, I’m done actually. I wasn’t that hungry anymore anyway,” Dahyun stood up after drinking the remaining water in her glass. She walked towards Chaeyoung and latched her arms onto hers. “Be right back!” Dahyun shouted, dragging Chaeyoung outside.

 

“What was that earlier?” Chaeyoung started questioning.

 

“What is?”

 

“You looked stoic while eating. Is there something on your armpit?” Chaeyoung continued as she tried to lift Dahyun’s arm to peek at her underarm. Dahyun instantly slapped her hand away and pulled her arm close.

 

“There’s nothing wrong with my armpit, Chaeng. What the hell. Are art majors normally this weird?” She replied while shaking her head. “It was nothing.”

 

Chaeyoung, although dissatisfied with the answer, just shrugged it off. She’s not the kind to probe on anything, really. If they want to say it, then they’ll say it. If they don’t, then they don’t.

 

They went on with picking two cocktail towers to kick off the evening, then agreed on ordering a bottle of vodka later on.

 

\--

 

_1:07 A.M._

 

Cocktail tower empty and about half a bottle of vodka downed. It was Chaeyoung’s turn to sing, choosing Beyonce’s ‘Love On Top’ while Jeongyeon borrowed her noise-cancelling earphones and got Dahyun pinned near the blasting speakers while Chaeyoung continues to hit the high notes. Just a mini payback for earlier in the car. Momo went out to call and check up on her girlfriend, Nayeon threw her arm around Chaeyoung’s shoulders and sang along, and Sana just silently sat on the red couch, taking and making rounds for the vodka shots while watching the chaos that’s going on around her. She was a little bit tipsy, already starting to feel a bit lightheaded. Sana tried shaking off the feeling, because she certainly doesn’t want to get drunk tonight. She knows how she can be while under the influence of alcohol, and she doesn’t even want to think about the possibilities that might happen when she gets intoxicated too much. She planned on talking to Dahyun about anything, just _anything_ , to get rid of the air of awkwardness between them. But right now, that clearly isn’t going to happen.

 

Fishing out a box of cigarette from her bag, Sana went out to smoke a stick, thinking that it might help her wash out the tipsiness even just a little. She searched for her blonde-haired friend, who’s still on the phone, and walked towards her side. Putting the cigarette between her lips, she grabbed for her lighter and lighted up her stick. She silently waited for Momo to wrap up their phone call before offering. Much to her surprise, the latter refused.

 

“Woah. Since when did you start refusing free puffs?”

 

“Ever since Mina told me to stop, which is about almost a year now.”

 

Sana chortled. Within their group, Momo’s the frontrunner when it comes to vices—drinking, smoking, drugs, etc., with Nayeon coming close at second. The only non-smokers in the bunch were Mina and Dahyun, except weed. Every time they come short on cigarette, they’d just ask for Momo and voila, a supply for the whole evening. It’s also one of the reasons why Momo’s apartment acts like their sorority house; it never runs out of liquor.  The ‘drugs’ department is kinda Nayeon’s turf, though.

 

“The cool, badass Hirai Momo, who can finish a pack of cigarette in a day, got her soul cleansed by an angel named Mina,” Sana teased. “Well, at least your lungs are.”

 

Momo returned the teasing with a smack in the head. “Yeah you can laugh all you want, I’m not regretting it.”

 

Expecting another laugh from the girl, she glanced at her friend who just gave her a smile and a pat on her shoulders. “It seems to me that she’s really the one then.”

 

Momo nodded. “She is. Well, I gotta go inside and check up on the madness inside.”

 

“Alright, I’ll be right back in a minute,” Sana replied. As if her brain was starting to f*ck her up from the alcohol, a certain memory surged up within her.

 

_‘Please don’t smoke too much? -D’, the post-it on her cigarette box said. She smiled, because the initial was clearly unnecessary. She already knew who wrote it just from the handwriting itself._

_Turning around, she saw the girl silently making the bed, then tying up her hair right after. Sana sneaked up behind her and gave a warm back hug while lightly kissing the girl’s exposed shoulder._

_“You don’t have to say ‘please’ if you don’t want me to smoke, you know?” she whispered, which earned a chuckle from the smaller girl._

_“I highly doubt that.”_

_“Why? You don’t think that I’d stop in a heartbeat even if you asked?”_

_The girl just nodded._

_“Well, okay,” Sana let go, grabbed the cigarette box and threw it in the trash bin near them. The girl turned because of the sudden lack of warmth, and silently watched Sana._

_“How about that, Dahyun?”_

_Smiling, Dahyun went up to her and wrapped her arms around Sana’s neck. “That’s some strong statement right there.”_

_Sana grinned. “Proud?”_

_Dahyun started leaning in and whispered against her lips, “You just made my morning even better than it already is,” pulling her in for a kiss. It started out lightly, then it slowly became heated and passionate as seconds passed by._

_Their friends would have to wait for another half hour._

Sana snapped back to earth as a group of noisy men in their twenties went out from the establishment, clearly drunk based on how they struggled not colliding in the glass door. Her cigarette was half done, but she didn’t feel like finishing it anymore so she put the fire out and threw it in the nearby trashcan. She sighed deeply, lightly slapping herself and went back inside.

 

\--

 

They stopped singing on the karaoke machine and started chatting for about 15 minutes now. Nayeon’s already dead and is dozing off with her head on Momo’s lap, drunk Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung occupying the other couch, and Dahyun sitting steadily on the other, trying not to move. Sana took a seat beside Dahyun, maintaining a good distance despite the couch’s minimum space. All of a sudden, Sana froze when she felt Dahyun leaning towards her, sniffing.

 

“Did you… did you smoke?” Dahyun mumbled, her eyes squinting while looking at Sana.

 

“I-uh, yeah, I did. I’m sorry, do you get bothered by the smell?” Sana asked and was about to stand further away, but Dahyun held her down by the arm.

 

“I thought you already quitted.”

 

“Y-yeah I did, but—“

 

“You promised.”

 

Sana kept mum. She knew the girl was already intoxicated, so it’s useless to explain herself further.

 

“You promised. And you broke it…” Dahyun muttered as she leaned closer to Sana’s face until they can feel each other’s breaths. Sana froze once again, her heartbeat became irregular, her palms starting to sweat. She can’t move, not when Dahyun’s staring at her like this while being just inches away from her face. Dahyun started leaning in again, and Sana just swallowed the lump on her throat and shut her eyes off, bracing herself for Dahyun’s next move.

 

Nothing.

 

She slowly opened her eyes when she felt the girl’s body crashed onto hers. _Great, she already passed out._ Sana looked at the others, thinking about asking for help but Chaeyoung’s already sleeping, Jeongyeon is staring blankly at something, obviously spacing out, and Momo was singing something she couldn’t comprehend. Sana sighed upon realizing that she’s the only slightly sober left.

 

Figuring that it would be real awkward when they wake up later in this position, Sana carefully lifted Dahyun so she can stand up. After that, she lifted her up again so she can properly lie down, grabbed a cushion to put under her head, and a blanket lying around (which she didn’t even know where it came from) to lightly drape on the girl’s body. As Dahyun’s breathing became steadier, Sana sat on the floor with her back leaning against the couch, downing the last two shots of vodka, and shut her eyes closed while trying to calm her insides down and getting rid of that annoying feeling of disappointment.


	7. Smoothies

Dahyun woke up to the sound of light music and a whirring blender from the kitchen. And a splitting headache.

 

Slowly pulling herself up, she looked around the room, scanning for familiarity. After some time of processing, she concluded that she’s in her apartment. She clutched her head tightly, feeling as if a hammer is continuously pummelling her brains out. She’s not the type to get a hangover when she drinks, she might’ve gone overboard with the alcohol last night. Even the memory of getting home is blurry.

 

 _So how did I get home?_ Dahyun tried her best to dig for any significant memory deep in her brain but she eventually gave up when it was only contributing to the pain.

 

With tired and heavy steps, she treaded towards the whirring sound, and found a brunette wearing an apron operating their blender, back facing towards her. Tilting her head a bit, she asked the stranger.

 

“Who are you?”

 

The _stranger_ was a bit startled by the voice, and turned towards the source of it. Turning the blender off, she spoke.

 

“Hey, you’re up,” Sana replied as she poured Dahyun a glass of smoothie she made. She made sure to leave a portion for Jeongyeon, leaving a note on the fridge before putting it inside.

 

“Here, for your hangover. I just found some leftover fruits you guys have and threw it in.” she handed the glass to Dahyun, and just stood there, silently waiting for her feedback. What if it tastes bad? She forgot tasting it before giving it to her.

 

Dahyun should be questioning _why_ Sana is in their kitchen, but she’s got too focused on the pain she’s experiencing. Sitting in the bar stool with eyes half-opened, Dahyun grabbed the glass and took a gulp. The smoothie was so good that it elicited a moan from her. Just on an exact level of sweetness, and damn so creamy. It might be the hangover talking, but this is one of the best hangover smoothies she’s ever had.

 

“Oh, this is delicious. Where did you learn to make this?” Dahyun praised, and continued to down more of it.

 

The compliment made Sana subtly quirk her mouth a little bit upward, a sensation of pride and joy surging onto her. She went over the sink to wash some plates and silverwares before answering. “One of my colleagues used to make me smoothies like this whenever I get hangovers. I gotta say, it is very effective.”

 

Dahyun just hummed in response after drinking until the last drop of the smoothie. Her headache starts to subside bit by bit. She started thinking about the things that happened last night. It’s not as hazy as compared earlier, probably because of the magical smoothie, because she remembers lots of drinking, singing, Jeongyeon pushing her face onto the speakers, Nayeon flirting with everyone, some person smelling like cigarettes—

 

“Wait, so how did I get home? And where’s Jeongyeon?”

 

“I drove Jeongyeon’s car. She’s in her room. Momo drove Nayeon and Chaeyoung to her apartment after sobering up a bit. She said she’s too tired to drive them to their own apartments.”

 

“What time did we arrive?”

 

“Around 5 in the morning, I guess.”

 

“Oh. Okay.” Dahyun mindlessly replied. As she was having a recollection of the happenings last night, she played with the hem of her shirt. Her eyebrows scrunched up a bit when she noticed her clothes— she certainly doesn’t remember wearing an oversized white tee, plus she’s pretty sure she changed into a ragged denim shorts on their way to the noraebang place, not this blue Spiderman boxer shorts. What was she missing?

 

“These are not the clothes I wore last night…” she mumbled to herself. Sana barely heard it because of the music and the running water. Dahyun looked up and spoke more audibly.

 

“What happened to my clothes last night?” She asked the brown-haired girl, who suddenly choked out of nowhere. Sana turned around, her cheeks slightly being coloured with a tinge of pink.

 

“Huh?”

 

“My clothes. Wh—“ Dahyun gasped as she widely opened her eyes the moment she realized the situation. “You changed my clothes?!”

 

Sana opened her mouth to say something and clear things, but no words came out. She knew what she had to say, since she expected this to happen, but she can’t seem to articulate them right now. Blood kept rushing to her face, her mind went into panicking mode. Shaking her head to get rid of unnecessary thoughts, Sana cleared her throat and tried to speak again.

 

“Okay wait. Before we get into any conclusions that might lead to misund—“

 

“DID SOMETHING HAPPEN?! YOU CHANGED CLOTHES TOO! YOU PERV!“

 

“What? No! Nothing happened, I swear not only to God but also to Jesus!” Sana denied with utmost fervor.

 

Dahyun calmed down for a bit, but she didn’t look so satisfied with that. The five-second silence urged Sana to speak again.

 

“Your—your clothes… While Momo’s lifting Chaeyoung up, her hands knocked down a—a glass of unfinished cocktail, and it spilled onto your clothes… I swear I’m not making this up, I have lots of evidences, your soaked clothes on the laundry basket, the towel I laid out on Jeongyeon’s seat so it wouldn’t get wet, and I changed my clothes because mine got soaked too when I was carrying you inside and—“

 

“Okay, fine.” Dahyun pressed her nose bridge between her thumb and pointing finger, closing her eyes for a while as she processed the new information. Sana went to the fridge and poured herself a glass of water while, fanning her face, hoping that the hotness would recede. After a moment of silence, the younger girl lifted her hand up.

 

“Wait a minute.”

 

“Hm?”

 

“So did you undress me and change my clothes?”

 

Sana almost choked from the water she was drinking, spilling some out of her mouth in the process. She coughed a few times to ease it up, and turned around Dahyun again, who’s just looking at her with her arms folded on her chest, waiting for her answer.

 

“About that…”

 

Dahyun just tilted her head, urging her to just keep on explaining.

 

“Since I can’t let you go to bed with damped clothes, I changed them. Carefully and with closed eyes, of course…” she muttered in defense while looking down in embarrassment, just resorting to fiddling with her fingers.

 

The younger girl squinted her eyes further, a bit unsatisfied with Sana’s explanation. “Are you sure nothing _inappropriate_ happened?”

 

Sana lifted her head up and exhaled in exasperation. “I am 110% sure I didn’t do anything but to change your clothes, which is just out of pure care and kindness and not anything pervy. Another note, I had a hard time carrying you guys in here because just in case you forgot, you live in the third floor. I had to carry your asses up all by myself. A little ‘thank you’ for all of that and the smoothie would be nice.”

 

Dahyun, still folding her arms, just looked away and contemplated for a while before mumbling a barely audible ‘thank you’.

 

“What did you say?”

 

“I said thank you.”

 

“I can’t hear you, you’re still mumbling.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“I’m sorry, can you please—“

 

Dahyun turned to Sana’s direction and grumbled, “I swear, Minatozaki Sana, if you make me repeat what I just said, I’m gonna…”

 

“You’re gonna what?”

 

Dahyun was about to retort, but no words came out of her mouth. For some reason, she was taken aback by the question. Sana used to do that when she wants her to be caught off guard. Used to.

 

The older girl was quite surprised too. It’s been so long since she heard Dahyun call her in her full name. It successfully tugged a smile on Sana’s lips.

 

 “…Whatever.” She breathed as she stood up to wash her empty glass. Every bit of information is just too much for her to take this morning. Her heartbeat was so loud that she can hear it reverberating in her ears. She tried covering her red face and ears with her hair but she looked too obvious and weird so she just silently prayed to the heavens that Sana didn’t notice.

 

Silence followed through again.

 

“So, we’re good?”

 

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Dahyun replied in the best uninterested tone she could give. She needed to dismiss the topic as soon as possible so it’d be easier to forget. Sleepiness is slowly knocking back to her system, which she was thankful about. She didn’t know how much time she spent sleeping but she could only care less about sleep duration.

 

“Hey, I’m gonna sleep some more, just lock the door if you’re gonna leave,” Dahyun said while walking back towards her room.

 

“Wait!” Sana yelled, a little too loud, but enough for Dahyun to glance back.

 

“Can I… borrow a paper bag or something to put my damped clothes in?”

 

“There’s many in the kitchen cabinet. Just search for ‘em.”

 

“Okay. Thanks.”

 

Dahyun just nodded and mumbled a ‘take care’ before shutting her door close. After hearing the main door shut, she was left with her own thoughts. The idea of Sana taking off her clothes and dressing her up with new ones makes her want to pull her hairs out. She doesn’t know if she should be thankful she wasn’t awake that time or not. Everything about Sana taking care of her last night was embarrassing.

 

Grabbing one of her fluffy pillows, she buried her head in it and screamed with all her might.

 

She should really control her drinking next time.

 

\--

 

Having a good one hour of jog everyday had been a routine for a health freak like Mina, even with her busy work schedule. She believes that it’s important to exercise daily to wash out toxins physically, mentally, and emotionally. Their apartment building’s near a quiet park so it’s really convenient. Usually she’d always go with Momo, who’s also obsessed with keeping her body fit, but she certainly cannot invite her to go with her today since her girlfriend literally just came home an hour and a half ago, along with two other drunk potatoes. She made a mental note to scold her for drinking too much and driving while still slightly under the influence of alcohol. She hasn’t even started emptying her stress gauge yet, and her girlfriend’s already contributing to the first half of it.

 

When she felt that the sun’s rays begin to become a bit harsh, she walked her way back towards their place. After having an ample amount of time to rest, she went on the bathroom for a quick morning shower. Putting on a clean set of comfortable clothes, she treaded towards the kitchen to make a hangover smoothie for them. Although she doesn’t have any idea about what time they’re planning to get up.

 

While in the middle of preparing every ingredient for the smoothie, a blondie emerged from her room, hair all tousled up, still wearing the clothes from last night that reeked of liquor.

 

“Good morning babe,” Momo went up to Mina to give her a kiss, but the latter pushed her face away to block her kiss attempt.

 

“Your breath stinks, Momo. Get away from me,” Mina complained, which earned a pout from the blonde.

 

“How about a hug, then? My head hurts…”

 

“No, missy. I just showered, and your clothes stink. Go wash up while I make you a smoothie for that,” Mina gave her a light ruffle before reverting her attention back to the blender. Defeated, Momo just followed her girlfriend’s orders and lifelessly walked towards the bathroom.

 

Fifteen minutes has passed, Mina was in the process of blending fruits, vegetables, and anything she could think of, while Momo was busy drying her hair with an extra towel.

 

“Still busy?” Momo sat in the dining table near the kitchen, facing Mina with a pout. It is one of her weapons whenever she wants her attention. It was successful, as the latter looked at her and chuckled.

 

“About to finish. Why?”

 

“Well, nothing in particular, really…” Momo mumbled off as she slowly approached Mina for a back hug. She started leaning in to trace the girl’s jawline with light kisses in which the latter responded with a hum. Mina tilted her head a bit to expose more of her smooth, flawless jaw and neck so Momo can access more of it. After a few more kisses, Mina turned around to face the blonde and smirked.

 

“I didn’t know I can turn you on just by merely blending something,” she whispered as she lousily draped her arms on Momo’s neck.

 

Momo’s hands were still wrapped around Mina’s waist, allowing her to pull the girl closer. “Oh please, you turn me on just by breathing.” She started leaning in for a kiss, starting with light pecks until they locked lips and turned it into a steamy make out session. They parted momentarily to catch some breath, and Mina used this opportunity to flip the latter so they’d exchange positions. Now she got her pinned on the counter.

 

“You… you’re such a bad girl for drinking too much last night even if I told you to control your liquor…” She whispered against Momo’s ears, which she knew that are one of Momo’s most sensitive spots. The latter shuddered underneath her, gripping on Mina’s waist. Her grip got harder when she felt the girl slip her hand inside her bathrobe to caress her toned abs, while she tried her best to bite back a loud moan when Mina slowly outlined Momo’s ear with the tip of her tongue.

 

“You like it, huh?”

 

The blonde only nodded.

 

“That’s good. But then, you made me angry this morning, so someone’s gonna get punished. Do you have any idea about what kind of punishment I’m gonna give you?” she softly spoke, lightly biting Momo’s ear afterwards. The latter grunted. The word ‘punishment’ didn’t sound as exciting as before. Her mind started to have all sorts of kinky thoughts the moment she heard the word, especially when Mina’s just touching her in all the right places. The girl really had her buttons memorized already, and she never misses a single spot. Mina just continued with giving light pecks on Momo’s neck.

 

“Y-you can do whatever you want on me, your highness.”

 

“Is that so?”

 

A nod.

 

“Okay then.” Mina then suddenly pushed herself away from the girl, grabbed a glass, and poured in the smoothie she made. “Here. Drink this.”

 

Momo was left dumbfounded. _Why is she suddenly offering me a hangover smoothie? Does she want me to get rid of my headache before getting into action?_

 

“Huh?”

 

“Drink.” She said in a stern voice. Hearing that tone, Momo took the glass with no hesitations and just when she’s about to drink it, she caught a whiff of the smell and she swear she felt like the odor punched her right in the face.

 

“What the hell is this?!”

 

“Hangover smoothie. Now drink.”

 

“But it smells like sh—“

 

“You’re not going to drink the smoothie I made just so you could feel better? How ungrateful.”

 

“Okay, okay! Fine!” Taking one deep breath, Momo downed two big gulps, her face all wrinkled up because of the awful taste. She wasn’t able to finish the whole glass because she had to run to the bathroom sink to throw up. She almost bumped onto Chaeyoung who just woke up because of the commotion.

 

“Woah. What’s wrong with her?” She asked in between yawning, pulling herself a seat in the dining table.

 

“Nothing, it’s just because of this.” Mina replied while pointing on the unfinished glass of green-colored smoothie.

 

“HOW THE FUCK IS THAT’S SUPPOSED TO CURE MY HANGOVER?!” a yell was heard from inside the bathroom.

 

Chaeyoung curiously picked up the unfinished glass and smelled its content. Boy, the smell can repel any kind of being, supernatural or not.

 

“That’s a hangover cure?”

 

Mina just smiled innocently before replying.

 

“No.”

 

\--

 

Momo was pissed.

 

Annoyed.

 

Irritated.

 

She gets that drinking beyond her limit was her fault and she completely understands why Mina is upset but to _tease_ her like that? It got her so damn frustrated. They haven’t had sex for weeks now because of their tiring work schedules and meetings, not to mention the times when Mina would force her to sleep in the couch whenever she does something her girlfriend didn’t want, and she’s starting to miss all the romance and fiery passion. It made the tease earlier even more frustrating because she finally thought she’s getting some.

 

Mina doesn’t seem to care, although she’s fully aware about how much displeasure she’s brought the blonde, and her being awfully quiet just explains it all. She wouldn’t even look at her when she asked for something, and if there’s any situation that Momo has to answer, she’d only give one-liners. Mina’s anger towards her girlfriend had already subsided hours ago, and call her mean or anything, but she’s really finding angry Momo cute and adorable. She couldn’t bring herself to apologize just yet.

 

The lunch was peaceful, mainly because Chaeyoung was too focused watching a documentary about the Renaissance period on TV that she barely noticed the tension between the couple, even though she’s literally sitting between them in the couch. Nayeon was supposed to join them but she only took a quick shower and changed up into new set of fresh clothes she brought with her (with Chaeyoung teasing her about being such a girl scout) before leaving, saying that her parents are going to pick her up so she had to hurry because her parents value time and she’s going to be dead meat if she shows up late.

 

Finishing her plate, Chaeyoung stood up and went to the kitchen sink to wash her plate and silverwares. The two was left in the couch, both not saying any word, nor try to move a muscle. Suddenly, they’re both interested in knowing more about Spanish inquisition tools, or at least pretending to so they can both avoid talking to each other.

 

Right after washing dishes, Chaeyoung went to the other room to get her bag and leave. Her mom was already looking for her, mainly because Mrs. Son asked her to buy her favourite cheesecake from her favourite café near her apartment.

 

“Yo love birds, I gotta get going now. Thanks for letting my drunk ass crash in here and for the free lunch! You guys are seriously like my second parents,” Chaeyoung said, giving both a kiss on the cheek before heading towards the threshold to put on her shoes.

 

“Do you need a ride, Chaeng?” Momo offered, hoping that the latter would say yes because she could really use a drive right now.

 

“Nope, I’m all good. Thanks for the offer though. Can totally feel the genuine love.” Chaeyoung bid one last goodbye before shutting the main door closed.

 

Silence filled the air. Mina glanced at Momo, who looks totally into the documentary. She nudged her leg with her foot to gain her attention, but the latter just grabbed it so it would stop poking her.

 

“Stop acting like you’re enjoying learning about Michelangelo and the Sistine Chapel. We both know you hate History with passion.”

 

Momo sighed. “What do you want?”

 

“Look at me.”

 

Momo sighed again before turning her head towards Mina’s direction. “Why?”

 

Mina moved closer to her before replying. “Are you still mad at me?”

 

“I’m not mad at you.”

 

“Then why are you ignoring me?”

 

“I’m literally talking to you right now.”

 

“But you’re still mad.”

 

“I told you, I’m not.”

 

“Give me a kiss, then.”

 

Momo contemplated for a while before leaning in to give her a quick peck on the lips. She diverted her attention back to the TV right after, which earned a pout from Mina. All of a sudden, Mina went on top of her and straddled her. She cupped Momo’s face and stared right into the girl’s beautiful eyes.

 

“I’m sorry, I was a little bit of an asshole earlier. I should’ve just stuck with nagging the hell out of your face.”

 

Momo smiled. How can she not accept this girl’s apology when she’s being this painfully cute?

 

“No, it’s okay. I should’ve listened to you anyway. I’m sorry, too.”

 

“So, we’re good?”

 

“Of course, babe. Can we watch no—“

 

Momo was cut right off when Mina bruised her with her lips. The kiss was full of yearning and sincerity compared to earlier. Momo wrapped her arms around the girl’s waist, hands roaming but weren’t looking for anything in particular, until it decided to grab Mina’s ass and give it a light squeeze, which made the girl gasp. Momo’s tongue finally found an entrance, in which Mina gladly allowed. Moaning through the kiss, Mina ran her fingers through Momo’s hair and pulled her head in deeper. They made out until their lungs screamed for more oxygen. They parted for a while, both catching their breaths.

 

“I have to say, you’re so adorable when you’re mad.” Mina whispered sexily against Momo’s lips. Momo pulled her head back a little bit to give her a confused look.

 

“Adorable? I always pictured my angry self as hot.”

 

“Well, make me change my mind, then.”

 

Momo smirked as her right hand snaked inside Mina’s shirt, slowly tracing random lines and circles on the girl’s skin, while the other caressed Mina’s inner thighs, making the girl close her eyes shut and bite her lower lip.

 

“Doesn’t seem much of a challenge.”


	8. Reconciliations and Restarts

Sana let out a long sigh as she hung up on the phone.

 

It was her third day back at their company’s main office in Seoul. After a 2-week Taiwan business trip, which were just basically a bunch of seminars (where she may have just slept on some, only if it bores the living fuck out of her) and sweet-talking to clients, which she didn’t have any trouble doing, her mind and body wasn’t just ready to go back to a pile of papers and proposals on her desk that she has to review and sign for by the end of the day. It’s five minutes to lunch and she wasn’t even halfway through yet. After doing a little bit of stretching she sat on her swivel chair and picked out a folder on top of the stack and began reading. A knock was heard from the door.

 

“Come in.”

 

A twist of the knob, a tall woman with brown straight hair clad in a black-and-white striped blouse and a pencil skirt matched with dark red pumps emerged and went inside. She sat in front of Sana’s desk, pulling in the other seat opposite her to put her feet on.

 

“What a busy bee,” the girl commented and chuckled. Sana still hasn’t looked up from reading though, her focus towards her work zoning out the rest of what’s happening around her. After signing, she put her pen and the folder down and let out a yawn.

 

“What do you want, Tzuyu?” Sana stood up and walked to the water dispenser to get herself a cup of cold water.

 

Sana wasn’t exactly the outgoing type when she first had her job at the clothing company she’s in as a Branch Manager in another office in Gyeonggi-do, not until Tzuyu came in. Make no mistake, Sana’s doesn’t exactly shut herself off from the rest, and she does socialize sometimes, hang out for a few drinks after a long day, but Tzuyu was the first colleague that she also considered as a friend. Maybe because finally, she’s not the only non-Korean employee in there, since Tzuyu’s from Taiwan. The girl can make friends with any kinds of personality with ease, which Sana admired a lot. Tzuyu has a lot of charms—from the way she talks, how she presents herself, how she can grace under pressure, not to mention that the girl is drop dead gorgeous. So when she got promoted as Head of Marketing Department and was relocated to the main office in Seoul, she was granted the privilege to hire her own secretary, and she picked Tzuyu to come with her, which the girl accepted immediately even before she can finish saying her proposal to her.

 

“I’m thinking a cup of espresso and a bagel,” Tzuyu responded while mindlessly scrolling over her phone. “How about you, champ?”

 

“Are you seriously just gonna eat a bagel for lunch? We should hit that new noodle place just two streets from here. I’m craving for ramen,” she replied while collecting her things from the desk. Tzuyu sighed in defeat. She really wanted that bagel.

 

“Fine. But you’re gonna treat me a bagel next time as payment,” Tzuyu stood up and went for the door, leaving Sana behind.

 

“Ugh okay. Wait for me you ass!”

 

\--

 

“You know what, I’ll never get why you passionately love ramen. I mean I get that it’s yummy and all but it tastes kind of ordinary to me,” Tzuyu commented while eating a forkful of jjajangmyun. The restaurant was already getting a lot of attention, judging by how it is already packed with people. Most of the customers were clad in their office attires, probably working just around the business center too.

 

“Because it’s good with all kinds of seasons. What I’ll never understand is why you keep on insisting that I look like your shiba inu pet, I mean I get that it’s cute and adorable but I’m more than that,” Sana retorted, taking a quick sip on her soup.

 

“Please, Scarlet is better than you. At least she’d always be up for a drive with me to my favourite café just to satisfy my bagel craving.”

 

“Probably because she’s a dog and has no other choice but to follow her master.”

 

Tzuyu scoffed and diverted the nonsensical topic. “Anyway, you have to attend a business dinner with Ms. Kwon and her staff tonight, 8PM at The Palace for that branch opening in a soon-to-open mall in Daegu. Minkyung and Yebin will come with you. For tomorrow, you have a meeting with the department heads along with the board, 10AM, for the monthly assembly.  For lunch at 12, you’re gonna treat me that bagel you made me ditch today, then by 3, you’re gonna hang out with your Japanese friends at The Bean. By the way, Mr. Park was asking if he could move his meeting with you on Friday instead, judging from the sound of his voice I think he’s still down the weather because of his recent divorce.”

 

Sana just nodded in response and sighed. She hasn’t started on her presentation report yet, so she’s guessing that she’s gonna be up all night again.

 

“Want company for tonight’s all-nighter?” Tzuyu offered.

 

Sana looked up and smiled at the girl. She knew Tzuyu knows that she’s not exactly good at staying up all night especially when she’s alone, but on how she was able to tell that she’s planning to, it amazes her sometimes.

 

“That wouldn’t be so bad.”

 

\--

 

Spontaneous midnight drive is one of Mina’s favourite kind of date with Momo. They’ve always done it when they were in college, sometimes with the whole gang too, but now that both of them got busy with their jobs, she’s come to appreciate it more. It’s been a while since they’ve drove Momo’s convertible to their ‘secret’ place up on a cliff, overlooking the breathtaking view of city lights of Seoul below, and the enormous amount of twinkling stars blanketed up above them. They’ve made a pact to each other that no matter how busy and preoccupied they get, they would always find a time to visit this place, reconnect, sometimes walk a trip down memory lane.

 

“It’s been a while since we visited this place,” Mina reflected while taking a sip from her can of beer. This has always been a special place for the both of them, not only because it really is a perfect spot for people who love stargazing, but because this was also the spot where Momo asked Mina to be her girlfriend, and is also where they shared their first kiss. It has been four years, and the warm and fuzzy feeling of that memory seize to leave the both of them.

 

“Yeah. I know I’ve been kind of… neglecting you these days because of work, that’s why I thought of bringing you here,” Momo spoke up with sincerity. She glanced at Mina and stared into her eyes. “I’m so sorry for not making time for you.”

 

Mina let out a chuckle and put her beer can down to cup Momo’s face. “Don’t beat yourself up too much. We both have been, and it would be wrong to blame each other just for that. We are two responsible mature adults and we’re just doing what we have to do.”

 

Momo brought her hand up to hold Mina’s. “I know. I just missed you, I guess.”

 

“I missed you too, jackass.” Mina replied with a smile. “So, am I the only one who hasn’t seen Sana yet?”

 

“Hm, you and Jihyo. I haven’t heard from that woman in months. I guess we have to visit her at some point in Jeju.”

 

“Oh yeah, she got relocated. She’s been mum on our group chat too. I’d probably give her a call sometime. Anyway, what happened on Dahyun and Chaeng’s graduation party?”

 

Momo sighed as she tried her best to remember the important details. “Well, we went to the noraebang place my uncle owns just near the university, we ate dinner and there was a bit of awkwardness in the air because Sana and Dahyun sat beside each other.”

 

Mina laughed, only imagining how real uneasy would it be if she was also in there. “Are you guys sure no one planned that to happen?”

 

“Well, I wasn’t feeling like a total asshole that night to stage that one. I think it was unintentional.”

 

“Nah, Nayeon was there. She’s always your substitute when you’re on a day off from your job of being that asshole friend.”

 

They both chuckled. Nayeon and Momo were always the dynamic duo when it comes to tricking and trolling the bunch ever since college. Sometimes they would let Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung in too, and the two would just agree since they don’t want to be the ‘victims’.

 

“Anyway, nothing important happened much that night, just the usual Nayeon taking most of the songs, including Jeongyeon’s which she’s not very happy about. Sana didn’t drink much though, can you believe that? Sana. Of all people.”

 

“I wouldn’t say I’m surprised, based on the situation she’s in I think she purposely didn’t want to get drunk that night. Not around Dahyun. We all know what kind of mess Sana could become when super intoxicated.”

 

“Yeah. Good decision though, because Sana was the only one sober enough to drive Dahyun and Jeongyeon home while I brought Nayeon and Chaeyoung. I swear I didn’t stage that one, it wouldn’t be so practical if we interchanged.”

 

“Oh boy. I can’t even think about how their morning went.”

 

They shared another chuckle. Mina leaned her head on Momo’s shoulder while reaching for her hand to intertwine it with hers. “I know their actions towards one another may seem petty and funny, but all kidding aside, I hope they both sort it out somehow. After all, they were close friends first before they got involved into that whole thing. I miss them goofing around, you know?”

 

“Of course. I do too,” Momo mumbled, adjusting their position so she could envelope Mina into a side hug, bringing Mina’s head closer so she can nuzzle to her neck. “We can’t pressure them, though. And I don’t think we have to. I trust both of them that they’re gonna fix this at some point.”

 

Mina nodded in agreement.

 

“I wouldn’t lie, I rooted for them. They seemed perfect for each other. Guess it’s not just really how it’s destined to play out.”

 

“I did too. I felt sorry for Sana at some point though, I know some got really worked up about her decision and saw her as the heartbreaking asshole, especially Jeongyeon,” Momo sighed as she recalled one of the dark patch their group has encountered. “It was such a mess.”

 

“I didn’t know we would be in such a depressing mood coming to this place,” Mina reached for the stereo and played Parachute’s ‘Kiss Me Slowly’. “All we gotta do is trust both of them and see how second chance will play out for them. But tonight,” Mina stared at Momo’s deep, dark pools as she leans in, “I want you to know that I couldn’t be thankful enough to have you, and if there would be a next lifetime where I’m still Myoui Mina and you’re still Hirai Momo, I’d come find you and love you over and over again.”

 

Momo smiled warmly, deeply touched with Mina’s declaration of love. It felt like they’re back at that night, only that Mina’s the one who’s saying all this swooning words right now. She pulled the girl into a deep, heartfelt kiss, hoping that it alone could convey all her feelings towards her, because even though the people around them have seen Momo as someone who’s always good with words, she couldn’t help but to remain speechless whenever Mina does that.

 

Under the pale moonlight and the glitter of stars, they’ve shared a slow-paced kiss, just focusing on how their soft lips perfectly dances with each other, and at that moment, Momo swore that she’s the luckiest woman on earth for having such a life partner like Myoui Mina, and she’d never fathom what she could’ve done right in the past to deserve her. And for that, she’s eternally thankful.

 

\--

 

The clock was about to hit 11 in the evening when they finally wrapped up their business dinner with Ms. Kwon. A lot of details and further arrangements have been discussed, and Sana could already feel tiredness creeping in her veins. After bidding Minkyung and Yebin goodbye, she shook herself up to regain some energy for a one hour drive to her apartment. She picked up Tzuyu’s call while the red light was still on.

 

_“Where are you?”_

 

“I’m on my way home. Gonna shortly drive by a coffee place to grab a brewed coffee to-go. Why?”

 

_“Nah. Just drive straight to your apartment. I remembered that you have some coffee maker that’s already dusting because you never use them so I thought, maybe I can do you two favors tonight. Oh, three actually, counting my company.”_

 

Sana snickered and slowly stepped on the gas pedal as the green light went on. She almost forgot that Tzuyu used to be a barista. “Sometimes it scares me to accept favors from you. It gives you higher chances of asking me to do you favors that I don’t like.”

 

_“Like you have a choice. Plus, now is not the time to reject my humanitarian offer because time won’t wait for you and your report, and I know you won’t deny that you love every drink that I serve you. Just get in here.”_

 

“Wait—in here? You’re already in my apartment?”

 

_“Why yes of course. I see that you haven’t changed your not-so-complicated password yet. It shouldn’t come as a shocker to you considering that I’m always the one dragging your drunk ass home.”_

 

“Remind me to change it next time. I know you’ve been eyeing my dog plushie for days now and you know who I’m gonna blame if that goes missing. Anyway, I’ll be there around twenty minutes. See you,” with that, she hung up.

 

She sure is very good at picking her friends.

 

\--

 

Upon entering her apartment, she saw Tzuyu sitting comfortably at the couch, watching some Disney Channel reruns, and a cup of cappuccino at the table. They exchanged a quick ‘hey’ before Tzuyu diverts her attention back at the TV, while Sana took a sip of the cappuccino before going to her room to settle her things down and go for a quick shower to wash off sleepiness. After slipping into her pajamas, she then joined Tzuyu at the couch with the cup of coffee on her right hand, and her MacBook at the other.

 

“Thanks for this, Tzuyu.”

 

“Yeah, save your speech of gratitude for later and finish your report first. Have you even started yet?” Tzuyu replied, her eyes not leaving the TV.

 

“Nope.”

 

“Well,” Tzuyu checked her watch, it reads 12:04AM. “You still have about seven hours tops to cram a detailed monthly report. And I do remember telling you to work on it already while we are in Taiwan. Whaddyudo, mate?”

 

Sana just rolled her eyes and sighed. “Save the nagging, Tzuyu. Just watch your Drake and Josh reruns in peace.”

 

Tzuyu was more than willing to comply with that one. Sana opened up a new PowerPoint document, picking a minimalistic design. After finishing about ten slides, Sana put her MacBook on the side and stood up to get her cigarette holder and lighter from her room. She went back to the living room and slid the door open just beside the TV and went outside the small terrace. Tzuyu turned the TV off and followed Sana.

 

“What do you got in there?”

 

“Mint-flavored.”

 

“Oh. I love those. Give me one.”

 

Sana handed her blue cigarette holder to Tzuyu after taking one. She also passes the lighter to her after lighting her own. Silence engulfed the atmosphere as they both listen to the faint sound of traffic down the road. A light sound of ‘ding’ disrupted the silence, and Sana fished her phone out of her pocket to open an unread message.

 

**_Minari_ ** _(12:47 AM): Ya, Minatozaki! I miss you so much, you little rascal! Anyway, we gotta cancel tomorrow’s lunch. We’re planning a movie night at our apartment though, so you better come! Chaeyoung and Dahyun are coming too. We will not entertain any kinds of excuses! That’s all, love u! xoxo_

 

Sana tossed her phone on the couch and took a long drag from her cigarette.

 

_Dahyun’s going to be there._

 

She didn’t know why she felt nervous at the thought of seeing Dahyun again, because their last encounter wasn’t exactly as bad as she thought it would be. But then again, she’s been thinking a lot about finally inviting her for a talk, and for a girl who’s been known for being optimistic and confident, Sana doesn’t know where to properly step her foot on. And even if Dahyun did agree to talk to her about it, what will she say? Start off with an apology, or with a ‘how are you’ perhaps?

 

“Hey, stop spacing out. You’re wasting your cigarette,” Tzuyu snapped her fingers in front of her face, waking her up back to earth. She was already pressing her cigarette stick against the ashtray to put out the fire before throwing it into the nearby trash can. “Penny for your thoughts?”

 

“It was nothing.”

 

“Something to do with the message you just read?”

 

“Well, I won’t be meeting my Japanese friends tomorrow for lunch. They invited me for a movie night instead.”

 

“And? How does that bother you? They’ll be playing horror movies?”

 

“No,” Sana put her cigarette out and blew out the smoke upward. “Let’s just say that they also invited someone that probably wouldn’t want me to be there.”

 

“Ooohhh,” Tzuyu scooted closer, crossing her arms on her chest. “I sense drama. Shoot.”

 

“Fine. This girl used to be a very close… friend of mine. And uh… we grew into something more than that.”

 

“Oh okay, I get it. Fuck buddies?”

 

Sana looked at Tzuyu ridiculously. “What? No! I don’t sleep with my friends. I had one night stands with some cute girls in the university but I don’t involve myself with them with things other than sex.”

 

“Hmm,” Tzuyu rubbed her chin like she’s trying to solve a mystery puzzle. “So you’ve had one night stands while you’re having a special relationship with her, and she didn’t like it?”

 

“What—“ Sana sighed and face-palmed. “No. I stopped messing around when I met her.”

 

“Well, that’s boring.” The taller girl chuckled.

 

Sana checked her wristwatch and thirty minutes have been already wasted. She stood up and collected her things. “It’s getting late. I better get back to my work. You can sleep in my bed if you want.”

 

“Nah, I’m not sleepy yet. Maybe I’ll have a marathon of Suits until I fall asleep,” Tzuyu responded and plopped herself onto the couch, turning the TV on again. “You have the latest season, right?”

 

“Of course.”

 

They went back to their previous set-up—Sana busily typing and proofreading documents and summarizing them for the presentation and Tzuyu quietly watching. Another thirty minutes has passed, and Sana peeked from her MacBook to see Tzuyu finally sleeping with her mouth agape. She chuckled at the sight and can’t help but to appreciate the girl’s peaceful pretty face. Now she began to understand why ‘shy’ and ‘reserved’ are everyone’s first impression of her.

 

She grabbed an extra blanket from her room and draped it over Tzuyu’s fragile-looking body. The latter moved and snuggled the blanket more for warmth. Sana moved her things to the dinner table and stretched Tzuyu’s long legs comfortably onto the couch. _God, she really is gifted in height,_ she thought.

 

After finishing about thirty five PowerPoint slides and three cups of coffee, she finally finished her report. Giving her guest a quick check, she went inside her room and lied down on her bed, which felt extra comfortable. She checked her phone one last time to reply to Mina’s text.

 

**_Sana_ ** _(4:32AM): Yeah, I’ll go. See you and the gang!_

 

She better not waste this opportunity.

 

\--

 

Sana groaned at the sound of her alarm clock. She was about to smash it in annoyance but realizing that she just bought it to replace her _broken_ alarm clock (she threw it onto the wall, making it the third alarm clock she broke) and that she might be late if she did break it, she pushed herself up and blindly searched for the ‘stop’ button. Sana squinted her eyes as the sun’s warm rays seeping through her curtain intrude the room, making contact with her face. Letting out a long yawn, she walked outside her room to check on Tzuyu, only to be greeted by silence, and a post-it note on the refrigerator.

 

_‘I didn’t bring extra office clothes with me so I left early. See u at the office later, champ._

 

_P.S. U should really talk to that girl. Stop chickening out.’_

 

A smile tugged Sana’s lips as she crumpled the piece of paper and threw it at the bin. She walked towards the bathroom and showered, imagining possible scenarios that could happen tonight.

 

There’s no turning back now.

 

\--

 

“Knock knock?”

 

Sana heard rushing footsteps towards the door and as it opened and revealed Mina on her pajamas, she gave her a warm smile and opened her arms wide for a hug.

 

“Holy shit Minatozaki Sana in the flesh!” Mina squealed and tackled Sana, fortunately keeping balance. Sana gladly returned the tight hug and went inside after.

 

“I bought two bags of Momo’s favourite popcorn,” Sana said, tossing it towards Momo’s direction, in which the latter perfectly caught, “bags of junkfood, and a liter of Sprite. Have you guys started watching yet?”

 

“Nope,” Mina replied, searching and digging the bag Sana put in the counter. “Did you buy Cheetos?”

 

“I think. Just search the bag.”

 

Sana untied her sneakers before going to the carpeted TV area. “It’s been a while since I’ve been here. I remember when we used to fall asleep drunk on this floor.”

 

“That hasn’t changed much,” Momo patted a spot beside her, calling Sana to sit. “We still fall asleep drunk in here. I bought a carpet so it would be more comfortable.”

 

The three shared a laugh. Sana felt a sudden rush of memory going on in her head. She reminisced every moment she had in all of the corners she and Momo shared when they were still college students, from the day she moved in until she had to move out for her job, with Mina replacing her. Her eyes roamed around, seeing the same paintings hung on the walls (some are from Chaeyoung, while they bought the others), the same tacky design of the bathroom door, the old and chapped beige-colored walls now repainted with white. Boy, she missed this place a lot.

 

“Where’s Chaeyoung and Dahyun?” Sana inquired. She thought that the two might be inside the guest room (previously her room), but it was quiet.

 

“They said they had dinner together. They’re on their way now,” Mina responded. She poured a bag of Cheetos on a bowl before joining the two. “What movie genre do you guys have in mind?”

 

“Sci-Fi!” the blonde shouted with much enthusiasm she also spilled the bag of popcorn she’s holding. “Let’s have a Star Wars marathon!”

 

“Okay calm down, kiddo,” Mina patted her girlfriend’s head. “How about you, Sana?”

 

“I’ll be okay with anything,” Sana mumbled, busy scrolling on her inbox. She read a message from Tzuyu saying that she e-mailed her something regarding a client. “Hey, what’s your wifi password?” she inquired.

 

Mina and Momo looked at each other, trying to hold down their giggle down.

 

“You should know, you’re the one who set it.”

 

“What? I don’t remember.”

 

“dahyunniestoopid21. Ring a bell to you now?”

 

Sana crunched her eyebrows as she tried recalling any memory of her changing the password to ‘dahyunniestoopid21’. She chuckled when it finally rang a bell on her—it was the time when she and Dahyun had a fight because of Sana’s overly-clingy groupmate.

 

“I remember now. God, I’m cringing over the fact that I spelt ‘stupid’ with two ‘o’,” Sana went to her mail and opened Tzuyu’s message. “I’m surprised that you guys haven’t changed it yet. It’s been years. Change it to ‘japansbestlesbians’ or something. I bet no one can hack into that.”

 

“Ha ha, hi-larious. Although that ain’t a lie.” Momo searched her hard drive for the ‘Star Wars’ series, having a hard time since she haven’t organized her folders yet. The sound of the door opening caught their attention as two girls laughing tremendously entered the apartment.

 

“I’d like to think that the two of you didn’t smoke a blunt without us. You two are laughing like madmen,” Mina approached the kitchen to get the cups and bottle of Sprite. Chaeyoung and Dahyun, who are now sitting on the floor, have been focusing on containing their laughter, clutching their abs that has been hurting for a while now.

 

“Fuck you Chaeng. You owe me 40000 won! I told you she’s not gonna buy that,” Dahyun said through heavy breaths and chortles.

 

Dahyun and Chaeyoung walked towards the living room and sat in front of Momo and Sana, their faces red and sweating. “Hey guys,” Chaeyoung greeted, still panting.

 

Sana waved in return, and taking a quick glance on Dahyun. Her heart almost skipped a beat when their eyes had contact, and her mind momentarily went blank and all she can do is give her an awkward smile. She immediately broke the eye contact and went back to replying on Tzuyu’s e-mail.

 

_Compose yourself. Compose yourself!_

 

“I’d like to ask for the context on why you two are about to die of laughter but you guys laugh at pretty much everything so I don’t think it’s interesting enough,” Momo replied.

 

“Alright ladies,” Mina came back with a tray of glasses on one hand and the Sprite on the other. “Tonight is Star Wars night, as per Momo’s request. Are there any objections?”

 

Chaeyoung lifted her body and her hand up towards Momo, asking for a high-five. “Great choice as always, Momoring! I should’ve brought my lightsaber toy for better viewing experience.”

 

“I HAVE TWO! Red and green!” Momo exclaimed and excitedly stood up running towards her room to get the said lightsabers. Sana chuckled in amusement, judging her friends’ dorkiness and nerdy nature.

 

“You know, for a girl who owns multiple leather jackets and ripped jeans, she can be one heck of a nerd sometimes.”

 

“One of her charms. I find it adorable,” Mina replied as a smile tugged on her lips when Momo came back rushing with two swords pinched between her armpits.

 

Sana scoffed. “Of course, she’s your girlfriend for God’s sake.”

 

Momo handed the red one to Chaeyoung and they both lighted it up before pressing play. “Okay, here we go!”

 

\--

 

One movie down, second movie already halfway.

 

Momo was continuously munching on the bag of popcorn (surprisingly she hasn’t eaten all of it yet for the first half of the first movie) while clutching the lightsaber with her other hand. Mina had her arms around Momo the whole time, mindlessly drawing lines and circles on the girl’s arms and giving the blonde random pecks to get her attention when certain parts bore her. Chaeyoung was lying on her stomach, with Dahyun lying beside her, her head resting on Chaeyoung’s back.

 

_What if Dahyun falls asleep? How will I ask her?_ Sana began thinking, as she quietly sat still beside the lovebirds, resisting to roll her eyes when the two starts to become too much lovey-dovey. As if the universe has heard her pondering, Dahyun pushed herself up and went to the kitchen to drink some water. This is now Sana’s cue, so she stood up and followed her.

 

“Hey, Dahyun?” Sana quietly called out, enough to earn the attention of the latter. Dahyun looked back while sipping from her glass.

 

“Yes?”

 

“I… I’m just gonna ask if I can invite you to dinner sometime. To-to, uhh,” _Fuck, stop stuttering._ “To catch up or something? And talk about _things_?”

 

Dahyun held the glass down and put it in the counter before speaking. “What things?”

 

Sana swallowed the lump that’s been beginning to form in her throat. She can already feel her palms sweating in nervousness. “About the—“

 

“Joking. I get it. But actually I don’t think we have to talk about _that_ anymore, Sana.” Dahyun started walking back towards the TV Area but stopped on her tracks when Sana clutched her arm.

 

“Wait. I-I think we do,” Sana sighed and muster all of her confidence to look Dahyun straight in the eye. “Look, I really want to patch things up between us. And I don’t think that this can be fully fixed without clearing the misunderstandings we had in the past. I promise I won’t waste any minute of your time. Please?”

 

After a while of intense pondering, Dahyun looked away and finally decided. “Okay then. But I can’t go for the next few days, we’re gonna celebrate my mom’s birthday in my granny’s house. Maybe you can ask me after this week.”

 

Sana can’t help but to smile widely at the acceptance. “Yeah, yeah, sure. Whatever’s convenient for you. Thank you, Dahyun-ah.”

 

“Sure.” Dahyun responded. Sana let go of her arms before they both treaded back. They halted when they saw the three already asleep—Momo still had her hand inside the popcorn bag while snuggling close to Mina, and Chaeyoung already snoring with her mouth agape, a spot of drool evident on the cushion she’s resting on.

 

“On the other hand,” Dahyun turned to the taller girl. “Up for a drive to Han River?”

 

\--

 

The drive towards the 24-hour coffee shop near the skirts of Han River was quiet, but not exactly as awkward as before. Dahyun just looked out of the window the whole time, observing the cars and lampposts they pass by. The sound of a soft ballad coming from the radio engulfed the whole car. Upon reaching their destination, Dahyun immediately shivered as the cold midnight wind softly kissed her skin. She was dumb enough to forget to bring a jacket when she’s just wearing a simple light blue shirt and a pair of denim shorts. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Sana as she immediately grabbed a spare jacket from the passenger’s seat at the back.

 

“Here. It’s easy to catch a cold nowadays,” Sana softly draped the jacket onto Dahyun’s shoulders. The latter just mouthed a little ‘thanks’ before entering the shop. For some reason, the shop was still slightly packed of customers, probably because this is the only available go-to coffee shop of those who want to pull an all-nighter. Dahyun ordered a hot latte and an Oreo cheesecake while Sana had a chocolate milkshake.

 

“Maybe we could sit outside, it’s crowded in here.” Dahyun suggested.

 

“But aren’t you gonna feel cold?” Sana asked worriedly. It’s like 11 degrees outside, or at least that’s what her weather app says.

 

Dahyun just shrugged and went for the door. “Nah, I can handle that. I have your jacket anyway.”

 

They settled on a table just near the river. There’s not much to see but the collective lights shimmering not so far away from the buildings and cars because of the darkness. Their orders came just in time, and when the waiter finally left, the cloud of awkwardness hovered upon them again.

 

“I-I don’t know how I should start off but I guess I’ll just say whatever’s on my head right now and sorry if it wouldn’t be coherent enough…” Sana looked at Dahyun, who’s just cupping the coffee cup for heat with her eyes looking down the ground. The lack of response from the latter was Sana’s signal to continue. Sana deeply inhaled and exhaled before starting to speak.

 

“I invited you for a talk so I can finally apologize for a lot of awful things I’ve caused you. Actually, I’ve been wanting to talk to you for so long now, ever since I graduated, but Jeongyeon and the others told me that it would be best if I don’t so I patiently waited for this moment.” Sana started fiddling with her fingers, a mannerism she always had whenever she feels jittery.

 

“I’m sorry for not being strong enough to end the things between us properly. I was a coward for just suddenly giving you a cold shoulder and not talk to you for days that turned to weeks, and eventually became years. I-I was in a bad place that time—I was tired, pressured, and confused. My academics were very important to me, and the pressure from it already held me onto the edge of my sanity. I can barely think straight about anything. That’s why I lessened my interaction not just with you, but also with everyone.” Sana gave Dahyun another glance to see the girl’s expression, but she was just sitting still, picking at the cheesecake with a fork, her eyes fixated on the small plate.

 

“And… I’d be lying if I say that it’s the only reason why I shut you out. A lot of thoughts have been clouding my mind, about the two of us. About what we really were. I know some were thinking that we’re just messing around and sleeping together but no, I never saw you as a mere fuck buddy, and we both know it. I know we’ve never talked about it but we both knew about each other’s feelings and we had a great run but I… I got scared. Especially after that night when you hinted me about wanting to be in a deeper, serious relationship with me. It just dawned on me that I couldn’t trust myself just yet to commit and involve myself with someone. I panicked over the idea of having a romantic relationship, and I wasn’t really in the right mental state to focus on that before. Because of everything that’s been happening around me, instead of seeing it delightful, I saw it as a problem. Although I… I did consider the possibilities. But whenever I do, another thought would haunt me. If I don’t know how to handle and maintain a normal healthy relationship, what more a long distance one? I realized that I might just be holding you down if ever we did become official. There are plenty of people that are better for you than me.”

 

Sana paused for a while to compose herself as her voice began to shake, a tear threatening to escape her eyes. She cleared her throat before continuing.

 

“I never knew that I needed this much time to distance myself from you to get my thoughts straight. I’m so sorry if I led you on. I know shutting you out was a major dick move, and I’m not gonna defend myself. I’m a dick, an asshole, anything you want to call me.”

 

Sana blinked and there it was, a tear drop. Followed by another one. And another.

 

“I’m in no position to force you to be friends with me again, because that’ll be your call. And I’ll totally understand if you don’t want the friendship back, and I probably deserve it. I really am just here to finally apologize to you face to face. I’m so sorry, Dahyun-ah.”

 

Only the soft sound of running water could be heard as they kept mum, alone in their own thoughts. Sana quietly wiped the tears off her cheek, reaching for the glass of milkshake as she attempted to regain the lost appetite.

 

“I know. And I understand.”

 

Sana looked up at the sudden voice. She saw Dahyun looking at her with watery eyes, smiling.

 

“Yeah, of course, I was hurt. For a very long time. There are countless times where I ask myself what I did so wrong for you to suddenly ignore me just like that, with no words said, no questions asked. And yes, I detested you.”

 

Dahyun paused for a while to take a sip of her latte. She raised her hand to wipe her eyes.

 

“I detested you to the point that I also hated every single thing that reminded me of you. I stopped going to Momo’s apartment, stopped passing by the usual spot where we would hang out during vacant periods. I even repainted my room because you said that you liked the previous one. I dodged every possible thing that would lead to any thought of you.”

 

Sana just had her head hung low, her eyes brimming with tears yet again.

 

“But at some point in time, I thought that it wouldn’t be fair to hate you just because of that. Yes, you’ve hurt me, but I know you, and you’re not a bad person, Sana. You’d never do that just because you want to screw me over. Yes, it was a dick move to completely ice me out of nowhere, but other than that, I don’t think you did anything wrong. I know you had your own reasons, and I’ve come to respect that. This whole thing is no one’s fault, well if you just talked to me about it then it wouldn’t be as bad but, like I said, it’s no one’s fault. Feelings and all its jazz are confusing as fuck. Life would always find a way to screw people over and we just gotta hold on until it’s done fucking you up, while never knowing when it’s going to come back and destroy us into pieces again.”

 

Dahyun wiped her tear-stained cheeks once again before facing Sana. “Sana, look at me.”

 

Sana dabbed her eyes with her long sleeves before looking up. “Hmm?”

 

“Stop blaming yourself now. What’s done is done, and I forgive you.”

 

Sana swore that it felt like the time had stopped and her brain recorded what Dahyun just said, playing it on loop as she stared at Dahyun in shock. She didn’t know how to react—emotions are suddenly surging onto her veins and she just sat there, astounded, unmoving, frozen. It’s either she’s dreaming, or she mistakenly took a drug to make her hallucinate like this.

 

“A-Are you—what?”

 

“Do you want me to take it back?”

 

“NO!” Sana loudly blurted out, instantly putting covering her mouth with her hands when a few people weirdly glanced back at them. Sana calmed herself down and cleared her throat. “So, uh, we good?”

 

Dahyun smiled and brought her fist up to Sana. “Yeah. Wanna bro fist on that?”

 

Sana brought her fist up to Dahyun’s for a bro fist, and they both shared a good laugh. Sana never thought that laughing would feel this good. The heavy sack of guilt and uncertainty that’s been sitting on Sana’s chest for years has finally been lifted, and is now filled with warmth from the smile Dahyun is giving her. This can’t be real. This is too good to be real.

 

From the moment she met Dahyun up to now, the girl never stops to surprise and amaze her.

 

“Finish up your cheesecake. We better get back to the apartment now or else they’re gonna think that you kidnapped and killed me on some random street corner,” Sana joked, standing up to stretch her arms and legs. She inhaled a good amount of air, and that was the first time she can finally _truly_ breathe.

 

“Ha ha. Just a reminder that we’re still out here and I can still do that if I wanted to,” Dahyun threatened as she downed the remaining content of her cup. “Let’s go, squirrelface.”

 

“Wow. It’s been two and a half years now and you still haven’t thought of a better name to call me? And that’s hardly an insult, by the way. Squirrels are cute as hell.”

 

They just continued their little banter until they’ve entered the car and hit the road. The car that was enveloped with silence just an hour ago is now filled with exchange of chats and random teasing. They might never say it, but everyone would definitely notice how much they’ve missed each other.

 

For once in Sana and Dahyun’s lives, something finally felt right.


	9. For Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First part of a flashback on Sana and Dahyun's past.

_“Excuse me, excuse me!”_

 

_The market center was bright, busy and crowded as usual. As the sun had already started to set, neon sign and boards started to light up as well. Since the place was surrounded by different business establishments and residential neighborhoods, she should’ve expected this. Not only do the stores are filled with customers coming from different directions, but the market center also serves as the shortest way towards the bus stops, so many people chooses this passageway and really is quite packed most of the time, especially at this hour. Dahyun cursed under her breath for not buying everything she needs at an earlier time._

 

_“5:15PM. Fuck.” She hissed as she rolled her sleeves down after checking her watch. Jeongyeon was nowhere to be found, Chaeyoung won’t answer her phone, probably hibernating again after having a Classic Movies marathon. After scrolling a little bit on her contacts, she pressed on Momo’s number._

 

“Hello?”

 

_“Momoring! Are you doing something?”_

 

“Nothing much. Why what’s up?”

 

_“I’m just gonna ask a little favour. Actually it’s not a favour, it’s a deal.”_

 

“Well, I’d like to hear your proposition. Does this concern food?”

 

_“No, but something better than that. Is Mina visiting your apartment tonight?”_

 

“Yeah, she’s just finishing something and we’ll watch a movie together outside. Why?”

 

_“How about this—I need you to tell Sana not to come home to your apartment. Tell her you want to spend the whole night with Mina only. That way you’ll have the whole apartment to yourselves. Sounds good?”_

 

_There was a short pause from the other end of the line._ “Deal. But why can’t you just ask her yourself? Are you planning something?”

 

_“Just a little surprise?”_

 

“What surprise?”

 

_“I’d like to leave on that. Anyway, thanks Momoring! Say hi to Mina for me!” And ended the phone call before Momo can even start probing more._

 

_“Wine check, Bacon check, fettucine pasta, all-purpose cream…” Dahyun goes through her grocery checklist again. There are about four items left, and so she scurries to the nearest vegetable stand she found. After getting the brown paper bag and paying the lady, she wiped the beads of sweat forming on her forehead with the back of her hand and hastily walked her way towards the flower shop right across the street._

 

_The florist came out to attend to her seconds after she heard the bell from the door ring. Dahyun cleared her throat as she approached her._

 

_“Uhm, good afternoon, Mrs. Choi. I’m here to pick up the bouquet of Amaryllis I ordered yesterday.”_

 

_“Oh yes, it is ready. You’re Kim Dahyun, right?” The lady, Mrs. Choi, smiled warmly while she adjusted her specs._

 

_Dahyun returned the smile with the same warmth. “Yes.”_

 

_“Okay. Have a seat while I get them.” Mrs. Choi then went back inside while Dahyun took a seat on the couch. She wasn’t really a fan of flowers—heck, she can barely even name anything other than rose and chrysanthemum—but they sure is refreshing to look at. After a quick scan and appreciation of the shop, she checked her watch again._

 

_‘5:32PM’, its two hands say._

 

_“Damn. I only have an hour to cook and set up…” Dahyun clicked her tongue as she did the math in her head. She’s really falling short in time. She fished out her phone and dialled Jeongyeon’s number. After a few rings, Jeongyeon finally answered._

 

_“Jeongyeon! Are you at the apartment right now?” she exclaimed, rush evident in her voice._

 

“Woah, slow down kiddo. Yeah, I just got here. What do you need?”

 

_“Can you please clean up? I’m about to go home in like, 15 minutes.”_

 

“What? Hey, it isn’t my turn to clean today, young lady. According to the cleaning schedule we have posted on the fridge, you should be the one cleaning!”

 

_“Yes, I know, but—look, I’m really running out of time. Just do it, please? I need the apartment to be squeaky clean! I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”_

 

“Ugh. Fine. What’s the rush for anyway? You planning something?”

 

_“Nothing, just—just gonna cook dinner for Sana. She seemed to be under a lot of stress lately.”_

 

_There was a short moment of silence on the other end of the line, then Dahyun hears a snicker._ “Oh wow. You two are cooking each other food now? Didn’t know your relationship is already in that level.”

 

_“Shut up. Just—“ Dahyun looked up when the florist came back with the bouquet at hand. “—Just do what you have to do.”_

 

“Sure thing, sweetie. Say hi to Sana for me later when you pick her up!”

 

_“BYE!” With that, she ended the phone call. The florist handed her the bouquet of Amaryllis, arranged so beautifully._

 

_“Here you go. I suppose you’re gonna surprise your partner with a dinner perhaps?” The florist asked in a friendly manner as she eyed the brown paper bags on Dahyun’s arms._

 

_“Well, not exactly a partner…” Dahyun laughed nervously and gave the lady a sheepish grin. She reached for her wallet and handed her the payment. “Just someone special to me.”_

 

_“Oh. That’s sweet. This person sure is lucky then.” The lady once again gave her a warm smile. “Enjoy the night, young lady.”_

 

_Dahyun smiled and paused momentarily to imagine how the rest of the night will go, forgetting that she’s in a rush._

 

_“Thank you. We will.”_

 

_\--_

 

_There were rustles and nearing footsteps that can be heard from outside, and a twist on the doorknob later on. Jeongyeon peeked from the living room to see Dahyun hugging about three large brown bags and a bouquet of flowers on the other hand._

 

_“Oh. Didn’t know that the two of you are such big eaters. You bought plenty of food for two people.”_

 

_Dahyun dropped the bags on the kitchen counter and put the flowers in the dining table before taking off her cap. “Oh wow, you’re still here. I bought other goods and supplies we need here. We gotta fill up the fridge again anyway.”_

 

_Jeongyeon stood up and walked towards the counter to dig the contents of the bags. “Sweet. You bought my favourite hotdogs! You know me so much,” she went up to Dahyun and tried teasing her with failed attempts of landing kisses on the smaller girl’s cheeks._

 

_“Ugh! Go away!” Dahyun bellowed as she expertly dodged her best friend’s kisses and successfully pushing Jeongyeon’s face away, causing laughter from the two of them. “That’s not for free by the way, you’re gonna pay me for it. There’s a reason why I kept the receipt. Now, repay my good deed by helping me prepare and set up, will you?”_

 

_“Sure. Aren’t I the bestest best friend in the world, Dahyun-ah? I’m always present to support you in your endeavors, may it be romantic or not. This is something worth telling my kids, if ever I’ll have any,” Dahyun just responded with a raise of an eyebrow, which may be translated to ‘Just shut up and help me.’_

 

_“Aight. So, what do you need me to do? I have a special recipe that can definitely make her fall head over heels with yo—OW!” She shrieked when Dahyun had hit her head with a ladle._

 

_“I’m cooking Carbonara. You do the vegetable salad.” She also added some decoration plans about what she wanted to do for the whole apartment, and Jeongyeon can’t help but to suppress a laugh while hearing Dahyun’s dreamy plans, but she listened and took notes anyway._

 

_“I’m leaving at 6:30. I guess we’ll be almost done by that time.”_

 

_“So you’re really fetching her from class then?”_

 

_“Yes. Go on and keep on teasing me if it’s that fun for you.”_

 

_Jeongyeon broke out into a soft laugh. “No, silly.” She stepped a little closer to Dahyun and leaned back on the counter, her face suddenly turning serious, but soft. “This thing between you two… are you guys really going on_ that _direction already?”_

 

_Dahyun paused from chopping onions and turned around to face the latter. “To be quite honest, we haven’t really talked about… you know… getting exclusive and official and all that. We’re just enjoying each other’s presence and company. So far, it’s been going great, so I’m just looking at this whole thing positively.”_

 

_Jeongyeon nodded in understanding. “I see. Well,” She pushed herself off the counter and went back to the dining table to prepare the salad. “Are you planning on asking her soon? Tonight, perhaps?”_

 

_Dahyun quietly pondered on the question while continuing chopping the onions. She’d be lying if she hasn’t thought about it even once. It’s been a smooth 6 months, with occasional arguments then and there, most of them not even lasting a day unresolved. Heck, Sana has already met her parents too (introduced as one of Dahyun’s “closest friend”, of course), and they really loved her, based on how her mom actually pampered Sana more than her own daughter when she invited her over to their house for a week._

 

_Is tonight a good time?_

 

_“I don’t know, Jeongyeon-ah.”_

 

_“Hmm.”_

 

_They shared a quiet atmosphere for a while, leaving them in their own thoughts. The feeling of nervousness began to fill up Dahyun’s system, but she snapped from her thoughts when Jeongyeon spoke up again._

 

_“You know, this is by far the only relationship I can count as serious compared to your short-lived flings in the past. Whenever I see you together, there’s that genuine sparkle in your eyes that I haven’t seen before. I can see it in hers too.”_

 

_Dahyun just kept mum to process the things Jeongyeon is saying and continued cooking the sauce. She stopped when Jeongyeon asked her that one important question._

 

_“Do you love her?”_

 

_Jeongyeon doesn’t even have to ask, really. She already knows what Dahyun’s answer is going to be, but she just did for the sake of having Dahyun question herself once more and be a hundred percent sure of her feelings. Knowing Dahyun ever since her freshman days, she hasn’t seen or hear Dahyun show interest in anything close to serious romantic relationships. Yeah sure, Dahyun’s had flings with both girls and guys inside and outside the university, but she never made a move forward. If any of her flings does, she rejects them. Dahyun would reason, “I’m still young. Why am I going to tie myself in a serious relationship when I’m going to have plenty of time for that when I graduate?” and “Hell, I don’t even know what exactly ‘love’ is.”_

 

_For Jeongyeon, considering that she is Dahyun’s best friend of almost 3 years, it’s as big of a deal to her as it is for Dahyun._

 

_Turning around, Dahyun just gave her a light chuckle. She kept her head bowed, feeling shy about indirectly confirming her feelings all of a sudden even though it’s her best friend in front of her._

 

_“I may still not have the clearest grasp of the idea of love yet, but with her… I feel like I’m getting close.”_

 

_Jeongyeon just smiled at Dahyun’s reply. It wasn’t exactly a ‘yes’, but that’s just enough to hear. As they say, ‘actions speak louder than words’, and for the past months, the way Dahyun behaves and acts around Sana, how her mood can immediately shift noticeably whenever Sana’s name is brought up, was a big shout of ‘Hell motherf*cking YES I’m in love with this girl’ to everyone’s faces._

 

_“That’s what I thought.”_

 

_A ‘ding’ from Dahyun’s phone was heard. “It’s Sana. She said she’ll be out in about 15 minutes. I better get going now.” She quickly washed her hands and barged into her room to change into a fresher shirt, tossing the slightly sweaty shirt in the laundry bin. Putting on a little bit of perfume, she grabbed another cap from the rack._

 

_“Would you mind finishing up, Jeong? I’ll text you when we’re on our way.”_

 

_“No problemo,” Jeongyeon reassured and stood up only to pat Dahyun’s shoulder. “Hey.”_

 

_“Hmm?”_

 

_“We don’t know what the future might bring the two of you, but if you really think Sana is going to be worth it, then you should go for it. Whatever happens, we’re here. Okay?”_

 

_It’s rare for Jeongyeon to give serious advices like this to her, that’s why her words, accompanied with genuine concern, warms her heart. She was slightly taken aback, but she leans forward to give Jeongyeon a short but meaningful hug._

 

_“I know.” Dahyun whispered, slowly breaking the hug seconds later. “You know, you being so soft and mushy towards me makes me think that maybe you did something unforgivable.” She remarked while she grabbed the bouquet of roses and walked towards the apartment door. When she finally stepped outside, Jeongyeon grabbed the doorknob before speaking._

 

_“Well… I ate all your Koko Krunch. SEE YA!” Before shutting the door at Dahyun’s face._

 

_“What?! I—“ A ‘ding’ from her phone has interrupted her again when she was just about to twist the doorknob, but figured it’s impossible to get in since Jeongyeon’s pushing on it._

 

_“I’LL GET BACK AT YOU LATER, YOU ASS!”_

 

_\--_

 

_Crowds of students were already streaming outside from their classrooms when Dahyun got into the building. She trudged her way towards Sana’s designated room, holding the bouquet of flowers behind her back. Leaning her shoulder against a wall, she started scanning the area, looking for the familiar face she’s been longing to see the whole day. Dahyun peeked at the opened door to see Sana still packing up her things. A faint smile crept up her lips, which grew bigger when their eyes finally met. The latter responded with a faint smile and latched her shoulder bag before walking towards the door. It was already dark outside, but Dahyun just felt her day brighten up once more._

 

_“Hey, squirrelface.” Dahyun greeted with excitement evident in her voice. She found herself stunned for a moment when Sana was finally standing near her, and how couldn’t she? Sana was wearing a gorgeous floral dress that hugged her figure just fine, her brown locks flowing gracefully onto her shoulders, that natural scent that she found addicting and intoxicating ever since, and the smile she was wearing was enough to make her heart beat faster than the normal rate._

 

_“Hello to you too.” Sana responded and leaned in for a quick kiss on her cheek. Heat crept up in Dahyun’s face in an instant, and she tried her best to keep her cool. Definitely a hard task._

 

_“Here,” she said as she handed Sana the bouquet. Fortunately it wasn’t crumpled up when she was trying to get through all those people. “Just a little something for you. You seem so stressed lately.”_

 

_Sana’s eyes gleamed at the sight of the bright red Amaryllis, one of her favourite flowers. She beamed, her eyes turning into little crescent moons. “They’re so beautiful,” she commented. “Thank you.” Lunging forward, they shared a quiet hug for about a minute before breaking it because the guard was just about to close the classroom door and they’re kinda blocking the doorway. Dahyun slowly reached for Sana’s hand and intertwined their fingers before speaking._

 

_“Let’s go?” She asked with a smile. Sana took a moment to enjoy the warmth of her hand and stare at Dahyun’s eyes before nodding._

 

_It’s that kind of warmth both of them can definitely get used to._

 

_\--_

 

_“I don’t get Summer.”_

 

_Dahyun and Jeongyeon’s apartment is a 30-minute walk from the university premises. It’s that kind of distance that is close when you’re on a vehicle, but is a bit far when on foot. They are both tired from their classes and other errands that day but the weather that day was great, not too hot, and not too cold either. The sunset paints the sky so beautifully, with a tinge of orange that is softly colliding with the fading blue hue of the sky, so they decided to take a walk instead and appreciate nature itself. They shared a comfortable silence for most of the walk, relishing the feeling that they give off each other just by walking side by side. Dahyun would lovingly caress Sana’s hands with her thumb from time to time, and it never fails to tug a smile on the latter’s lips, responding with a light squeeze._

 

_“Summer? Like the season? Or Summer from the movie?”_

 

_“Yeah. I watched 500 Days Of Summer last night.”_

 

_“I haven’t seen it yet, so I can’t share you my two cents on that.”_

 

_Dahyun swiftly turned her head to face Sana, audibly gasping and looking at her with an incredulous face. “Are you for real?”_

 

_Sana just raised an eyebrow in an attempt to look offended, but broke into laughter just milliseconds later because Dahyun looked a little bit too cute. “So what?”_

 

_“Well, are you going to be busy tonight?” Please say no, please say no._

 

_“Hmm. I have to do—Wait,” Sana halted, making Dahyun stop on her tracks too. She searched for her ringing phone inside her bag to see an unread message from Momo._

 

_“Damn. Momo wants the apartment to herself because Mina’s coming over again.”_

 

_Dahyun suppressed a smile and telepathically thanked Momo for cooperating with her plans. “Is that so?” she replied in an innocent tone._

 

_“Yeah. Well I’d hate to be disturbed in the middle of the night with weird noises that is definitely from Momo’s room, and I certainly don’t want to see that smug look she puts on the morning after.”_

 

_“Oh, well I was just about to invite you over for a movie. We can watch 500 Days Of Summer tonight.” As if on cue, Dahyun’s phone vibrated as it received a text from Jeongyeon._

 

**_Jeongyeon_ ** _(7:12): Dinner’s ready. I’m heading out now. Don’t worry, I’ll be crashing at Nayeon’s tonight to work on our Communications paper, and I wouldn’t be back until lunchtime. Enjoy!!! ;) Tell me everything tomorrow but please spare my ears for anything impure. Love you!_

 

_For the rest of the walk they’ve talked about each other’s day, with mostly Sana grumbling and ranting about how she got a low score on a quiz on two of her majors, her group mates who seemed to not know anything about their parts on their report, and whatnot. Everytime Sana would frown, Dahyun would stop and pull the corners of Sana’s lips upward with her two index fingers._

 

_“Atleast they’re over now. Just talk to them next time, or crash their asses on the peer evaluation sheet,” Dahyun suggested. She smiled proudly at her ‘masterpiece’. “As much as you look cute when you are pouting, your smile is more adorable.”_

 

_Sana chuckled and playfully swatted Dahyun’s hands. “Ugh, can you not say things like that? You’re making me…”_

 

_“Making you what?” Dahyun pretended to innocently ask to tease the older girl._

 

_“Nothing.” Sana replied, stopping as they finally reached the door to Dahyun’s apartment._

 

_“Oh, c’mon. Making you what?”_

 

_If winning a teasing game is what Dahyun’s aiming for, then she was targeting the wrong opponent._

 

_Sana tugged on their linked hands, lunging Dahyun forward and closer to Sana. She started to slowly lean, her head tilting before she whispered. “What do you think, Dahyunnie?” A smirk was playfully sitting on Sana’s lips the moment she noticed Dahyun blinking fast, a thing she does whenever she felt nervous or shocked. It was the right counterattack, knowing that Dahyun becomes extremely soft and vulnerable whenever Sana calls her by that nickname. A nickname only Sana uses._

 

_“U-uh, nothing. Nothing.” She nervously chuckled before straightening her posture again. She roamed her eyes around, looking for something to focus on instead of Sana’s tantalizing eyes. Damn those eyes._

 

_“Hey, look! I’ve never seen that before. What do you think is that?” She pointed behind Sana, which made the latter turn her head in curiosity._

 

_“What is?”_

 

_“On the plant! Look closely.”_

 

_And so she did. “What… I don’t see anything.” Sana tried her best to look for whatever Dahyun is talking about, until her vision went black as Dahyun put a blindfold over the girl's eyes._

 

_“Yah, what are you doing?” She exclaimed, her hands reaching for Dahyun’s hands that is busy tying the ends of the handkerchief._

 

_“Just trust me. Wait here.” She then fished for her keys and opened the apartment’s door. As she pushed the door opened, Dahyun can’t help but to be in awe._

 

_She took a mental note to thank the bestest best friend that she has._

 

_Dahyun walked back to Sana and held her by the shoulders to guide her inside. Lightly pushing the door close, she let go of her again and positioned in front of her._

 

_“What’s happening? Can I take it off now?” Sana asked impatiently. As much as the blindfold is starting to annoy her, she can’t deny but to feel excited by whatever Dahyun was planning._

 

_“Wait,” Dahyun rushed to the table and grabbed a matchstick to light the candle. “You can take it off now.”_

 

_With a light pull on the knot, the blindfold let loose on Sana’s head. After her eyes have fully adjusted to the light, she can’t help but to be dazed._

 

_The dimmer light was set in an exact setting to match the vibe Dahyun’s going for. The dining table was covered with a red cloth, where on top of it two sets of utensils arranged nicely, two wine glasses, and an ice bucket where the wine is being chilled. There’s even a scented candle on the center of the table to complete the set. On their living room, the couch was slightly pushed farther away from the TV, a white mattress strategically placed on the extra space for a great movie watching experience._

 

_Dahyun felt giddy and at the same time nervous while she’s examining Sana’s reaction, but the nervousness washed out in an instant when she saw Sana look back at her, flashing her an eye smile once again._

 

_“Wow.” It’s the only thing she could say at the moment._

 

_“Well, take a seat first while I prepare us something to eat.” Dahyun reached her hand out for Sana’s, and the latter gladly hold onto hers. Sana placed the bouquet of flowers near the end of the table while appreciating the room, and once she’s settled, Dahyun walked up to the kitchen to prepare two plates of pasta. With two plates on both hands, she went back to the table and gently placed a plate in front of Sana which she responded with a soft ‘thank you’, and the other one on the other side of the table for her. Before taking her seat, she grabbed a remote to turn the player on which is loaded with an album full of ballads. ‘Pretty Thoughts’ by Alina Baraz started playing in a moderate volume._

 

_“Is there an occasion? Did you pass a test?” Sana asked while twirling on her pasta._

 

_“Nothing. I just noticed that you’ve been under a lot of stress lately, so I thought of treating you dinner,” Dahyun replied while opening the wine with a cork screw. “Do you like it?”_

 

_“Are you kidding me?” Sana paused from twirling and looked directly at Dahyun’s eyes. “I love it. This… this is how I imagine an ideal date, to be honest.”_

 

_A proud smile broke into Dahyun’s face as she poured two glasses of wine for the two of them. “Really?”_

 

_“Really. I wasn’t expecting the mattress part, but it’s a great addition.”_

 

_“I’m glad you liked it.”_

 

_They continued to eat their pastas in peace, taking sips of wine in between, quietly stealing glances from one another, and will just break into chuckles whenever they catch each other._

 

_“You know, when I first met you, I did not peg you for someone romantic.” Sana recalled, placing her fork down as she was done with her plate._

 

_“What? Hey, if I remember it correctly, when I met you, I gave you my coat despite the fact that it’s winter season and mind you, I’m not good with dealing low temperatures. That’s a pretty sweet move, don’t you think?”_

 

_“But I recall you threatening to leave me alone.”_

 

_“Okay, how would you even remember that? You’re super drunk that time.”_

 

_“Not all drunk person becomes forgetful about their night, Dahyunnie.”_

 

_Dahyun just sighed in defeat. “Okay fine. But I’m gonna let you know that this is the first time I’ve done something like this for someone. You should be proud of yourself.” Dahyun stood up after wiping her lips with a napkin to pick up their finished plates._

 

_“Well then,” Sana stood up as well and approached Dahyun to cup her cheeks. “I’m grateful. This is really sweet and beautiful.” She said, giving Dahyun a light peck on the lips. Sana walked towards the living room right after, leaving Dahyun with a satisfied smile on her face._

 

_\--_

 

_‘I need to know that you’re not gonna wake up in the morning and feel differently.’_

 

_‘And I can’t give you that. Nobody can.’_

 

_They were sitting comfortably on the mattress in the living room, resting their backs against the couch behind, with the promised ‘500 Days Of Summer’ playing on the wide TV screen. Both have been quiet as the movie progresses, both so engrossed and focused with the movie. Or maybe Dahyun would occasionally stare at Sana’s face a bit too long, studying every detail, like how she always does when she wakes up next to her in the morning. The older girl doesn’t seem to notice, though._

 

_‘You know, on the one hand, I want to forget her. On the other hand… I know she’s the only person in the entire universe that will make me happy.’_

 

_Sana let out a quiet snicker which was just enough to pique Dahyun’s interest (who are we kidding? Everthing about Sana would always pique Dahyun’s interest). She turned to face Sana, a big question mark written on her face._

 

_“What’s funny about that?”_

 

_“Oh, nothing.” Sana replied. “It’s just that what if aliens visited us and they’re unexpectedly very attractive, maybe even more attractive than the whole human race? Tom’s missing out on that possibility.”_

 

_Dahyun scrunched her eyebrows, but then chuckles seconds later at the kind of imagination Sana has. If Dahyun’s not totally whipped enough, she’d find it bothersome and weird, but that’s the thing. She’s whipped. Head over heels over this girl. And she’s not denying it._

 

_“Yeah, that’d be cool. If people from different races can have interracial relationships, then a human and an alien can make like… intergalactic relationships.”_

 

_“And intergalactic babies.”_

 

_The two became a mess of booming laughter and gasping for air for a good five minutes, completely forgetting about the movie._

 

_Sana may be weird, but she’s the kind of weird Dahyun wants to keep in her world._

 

_\--_

 

_‘You don’t want to be named as anybody’s girlfriend, and now you’re somebody’s wife.’_

 

_“See, this is why I don’t get her. Tom deserved more.” Dahyun sighed exasperatedly, dramatically pointing her hand towards the TV screen._

 

_“Well, if you ask me, there’s no one responsible of all the hurt and grief Tom’s experiencing but himself. He was stupid,” Sana commented while munching on the last piece of lettuce from her vegetable salad. “Summer made it clear that she doesn’t want to get involved in that kind of relationship, yet Tom still let himself fall in a spiral of his own delusions and expectations when he knew Summer couldn’t give him that.”_

 

_“But I doubt Summer didn’t know Tom’s falling in love with her. Yet, she still led Tom on.”_

 

_“I don’t think it was Summer who led her on. He led himself on. He knew what he’s getting into. Well, I hope he did. And the anger he felt shouldn’t be directed towards Summer.” Sana stood up and walked towards the kitchen sink to wash her plate._

 

_“So you’re Team Summer, then?” Dahyun yelled from the living room._

 

_“I’m not on anyone’s team,” the older girl defended, wiping her hands with a towel before going back to the living room. “I do feel sorry for Tom too, but he should’ve known about this: expectations rarely line up with reality. Life is extremely unpredictable. Whether someone stays or leaves your world, you should always get some sort of life lesson from them to guide you in the future. Life will hit you hard if you let it hit you hard.”_

 

_A yawn escaped Sana’s widely-opened mouth. She lied down the bed while the credits started rolling. “And look. Now that he’s detached from focusing too much on Summer, albeit incompletely yet, she found a new girl that may or may not change his life, and if she does, it might be a kind of change that is something different from what Summer had brought upon him before. And maybe, he can learn from his experience with Summer to start it off great with Autumn.”_

 

_Dahyun just looked at Sana the whole time with a small smile on her face as she listened to her lecture on life. Her points does make sense to her, and so she nodded in understanding._

 

_“You know, your weird antics would briefly make me forget that you’re a real smartass. One second you’d be talking shit about what it would feel like to be a cloud, the second after you’re talking deeply about life. Your mind, it amazes me.” She praised, stretching her body to lie down next to her. Sana snuggled close to her and wrapped an arm limply on her waist. Dahyun had her arm around Sana’s shoulders, letting her rest her head on Dahyun’s should. She mindlessly caressed the older girl’s skin, tracing random lines and shapes. Sana hummed in comfort, her eyes starting to get heavy pretty quick._

 

_“You’re lucky to know me then.”_

 

_“I really am.”_

 

_Dahyun reached for the remote on her side to turn the TV off. It wasn’t until five minutes after that she can confirm that Sana’s off to dreamland. She must’ve been really tired, she thought._

 

_Glancing at the face just inches beside hers, she brought her hand up to tuck the strands of hair that’s been blocking the view behind the girl’s ear. With the knowledge that the older girl is already fast asleep, she asked in a low voice._

 

" _Will you stay with me?"_

 

_Despite getting no response, she smiled to herself, quietly appreciating the beauty that’s right in front of her. The only thing that can be heard was Sana’s even breaths, and Dahyun’s pounding heart. The warmth both of them were emitting from each other is so comfortable, and short minutes later she can already feel the heaviness in her eyes as well._

 

_“I want you to stay in my life, Sana.”_

 

_She landed a soft goodnight kiss on Sana’s forehead before proceeding to closing her eyes, letting her consciousness slowly die down._

 

_Little did she know that the words she said weren’t left unheard._


	10. The Quiet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second part of a flashback on Sana and Dahyun's past.

_Sana woke up even before her alarm started to annoy the hell out of her._

 

_Or maybe she didn’t even really had a decent sleep._

 

_She carefully lifted Dahyun’s arms that was latched around her waist and slowly slipped out of Dahyun’s embrace. The sun had just started to rise, and so she lets the warm sunlight inside by sliding the curtains apart. The view from Dahyun and Jeongyeon’s apartment has always been beautiful._

 

_A quick arm and body stretch, and she went towards Dahyun’s room to get her own towel and a set of fresh clothes. Ever since Sana’s visits became more frequent, Dahyun emptied a drawer for her to put some of her clothes on. The cup that previously contained two toothbrushes have been three. She even brought her extra coffee maker for them to use, since Sana’s morning can’t be completed without a cup of warm black coffee._

 

_The warm water soothes Sana’s body as she took a bath. As she was rinsing the shampoo and soap off her body, she stood under the shower, her mind in deep thought._

 

_‘Will you stay with me?’_

 

_Sana went out of the shower to grab for her towel as soon as she was finished. After wiping the excess waters, she then brushed her teeth in a painfully slow motion, looking at her own reflection on the small mirror in front of her._

 

_‘I want you to stay in my life, Sana.’_

 

_Those two sentences have been on repeat on her mind the whole night. The mixed emotions she caught after hearing those words kept on raging inside her, knocking out every single idea of sleep out of her mind. A part of her was happy, but then there was a sudden feeling of fear and panic that came up to eat it all up._

 

_She stepped out of the bathroom with quiet steps, returning back to Dahyun’s room to slip on her clothes, wrapping her previous articles of clothing in a plastic before putting it inside her bag. Ah, Dahyun’s room has always smelled so good. Everything in this room, from her bed, pillows, to her clothes, just smells like her—sweet and fresh. Her hair was still dripping so she tried to dry it a bit more before hanging the towel on a hanger. Sana hates it when she goes out with a wet hair, but she figured that the noise from the hair dryer might wake Dahyun up._

 

_Shutting the bedroom door as soft as possible, she went back to the living room only to see Dahyun’s body still splayed on the mattress, sleeping soundly. She smiled to herself. Sana crouched gently to give a peck on Dahyun’s exposed cheek, thankful that the girl didn’t get disturbed from her sleep._

 

_Pure, and full of love. Those are the only things Sana can only think of at that moment while she took a moment to appreciate Dahyun’s serene face. She took a post-it out of her bag and wrote a note, posted it at a nearby coffee table, before standing up to put her shoes on. Picking up the bouquet of flowers from the counter, she left the apartment, with that unsettling feeling that seemingly won’t let her go._

 

_Pure, and full of love._

 

_Those are just two of the things Sana thinks she doesn’t deserve to have at the moment._

 

_\--_

 

_What’s a great thing to wake up to from a great sleep?_

 

_Not to an empty bed._

 

_And certainly not to the sound of booming laughs from the dining area, which was soon identified to be from two of her friends, Jeongyeon and Nayeon. Had they forgotten that there was another sleeping person in the room, or were they just purposely annoying her?_

 

_It’s already 11 in the morning. The sun’s rays have become harsher, forcing her to finally stand up to close the curtains. A post-it note on the coffee table caught her eye, so she picked it up to read it._

 

_‘Sorry for leaving early. Had to take care of a few things before meeting my thesis adviser. Don’t have the heart to wake you up for breakfast bc you seemed to be having a good sleep. Thanks for last night. :) be good!’_

 

_Dahyun folder the piece of paper and slid it into the pocket of her shorts. An angry grumble was heard from her stomach, signaling her that it’s about damn time to grab some brunch. When Dahyun emerged from the living room and onto the kitchen, the two were still laughing, with Nayeon covering her mouth with her hands to prevent her from spilling whatever she’s chewing on all over the table._

 

_“Oh hey! You’re awake!” Jeongyeon’s hysterical moment has finally died down, gesturing Dahyun to come and eat with them._

 

_“How can’t I? I think both of you have managed to wake up the whole floor.” Dahyun said groggily, scooping up rice from the rice cooker. After getting some utensils, she joined the two in the table, sitting between them._

 

_“I think you’re the only one left sleeping in this floor. It’s already past 11AM for God’s sake. You know what they say, people who wake up past 11 are lazy.” Jeongyeon reprimanded before slurping on her chicken soup._

 

_“That’s bullsh*t. Stop spatting lies out of your mouth while you’re taking in good food. God hates it.” Dahyun grabbed a piece of chicken from the plate and started eating._

 

_Nayeon gulped the remaining water in her glass before nudging Dahyun’s arm. “How’s your night by the way? Are the two of you the ones next in line after Momo and Mina? Because if that’s the case, I don’t know if I can stomach two couples in one room.”_

 

_“You know the drill. Spill everything but leave the gross part out. Don’t be like Momo.” Jeongyeon dropped her spoon and fork and adjusted her chair near Dahyun’s, while Nayeon leaned her head forward for greater reception._

 

_“She loved it.”_

 

_The two just stared in anticipation for more details, nodding to signal Dahyun to continue._

 

_“We had a romantic dinner, watched 500 Days Of Summer, and slept.”_

 

_“…”_

 

_“That’s it?” Jeongyeon asked, the spark of excitement in her eyes now gone._

 

_“Yes.”_

 

_“No sex?”_

 

_“Why are you asking when you just told me you didn’t want to hear that kind of stuff?” Dahyun took a big bite from her chicken, expecting that the two are already done probing, but their stares didn’t waver, so she swallowed and spoke. “No, we didn’t.”_

 

_Their shoulders slumped, their interest rapidly going downhill upon hearing the oversimplified story. The two stood up with their plates, about to walk towards the kitchen until Dahyun voiced out again._

 

_“I told her that I want her to stay in my life.”_

 

_Jeongyeon immediately went back to her seat while Nayeon stopped on her tracks, their ears ready to accept every bit of new information._

 

_“But she’s already asleep.”_

 

_“Is this really how you tell people stories? That’s no fun at all!” Nayeon exclaimed from the kitchen while washing her used plate and utensils, and just when she was about to get done rinsing, Jeongyeon handed her another batch of plates to wash. Jeongyeon just grinned at her annoyingly, ignoring the death glare the other girl’s been giving her while mouthing “F*ck you”._

 

_Contrary to Nayeon’s assumption, Dahyun is actually not much secretive when it comes to sharing stories with her friends. Heck, she even includes the unimportant details in, like the color of the clothes the person was wearing, the random moments where she gets cut off, the weather, and whatnots. But last night was something she consider as a very special moment on her life and between her and Sana, and she’d want to cherish and keep it between them as much as she can. Probably until Jeongyeon decides to guilt-trip the hell out of her._

 

_Luckily for her, the duo had stopped with the questions. Her tactic has worked after all. She mentally noted to always use it in the future._

 

_“Jeong, thank you for last night, by the way.”_

 

_“Sure. I know I did a great job, so no need to praise me or something.”_

 

_“I wasn’t gonna.”_

 

_Dahyun stood up to wash her own plate, sneakily putting Jeongyeon’s apartment keys that’s been lying on top of the fridge into her pocket._

 

_“Oh, and when you go out later and return without replacing my Koko Krunch, you cannot enter this apartment.”_

 

_\--_

 

_The department was busy as usual. Students coming in and out to consult to their professors, or to get important papers signed, or to have their grades checked. In the middle of all this, Sana sat at the corner of the couch, clammy hands clutched on her knees. Her adviser didn’t seem happy based on the e-mail she read this morning. She constantly toyed with the hem of her bag while anxiously waiting for her adviser’s assistant to call her in._

 

_“Miss Minatozaki? You can enter Mrs. Hwang’s office now.” The assistant called, motioning her to come in. With heavy steps, she entered the room, the coldness due to the A/C seemed to not help calm her nerves at all._

 

_“Good morning, Mrs. Hwang.”_

 

_“Good morning, Sana. Have a seat.”_

 

_Mrs. Hwang collected a couple of documents cluttered on her desk while Sana settled down. Various academic certificates and a few little paintings were hanged all over the wall, a bookshelf that is full of different books, reading materials, theses from her many advisees in the previous years, and a glass cabinet where Mrs. Hwang’s awards and plaques that she has received in recognition for her outstanding academic works were displayed. All of these speak of two things: Mrs. Hwang has strived hard for academic excellence her whole life, and it is not surprising if she’d push the students under her to do the same. The woman was not known for being one of the “big” figures of this department, for a lot of the students she previously handled had won awards for their theses, or excel in other academic endeavors._

 

_“Okay. So, how are you?”_

 

_“I’m doing great, thank you for asking.”_

 

_“Well, have you taken note of all the comments and revisions I want to see in the Chapters 2 and 3 of your thesis?”_

 

_“Yes, ma’am.”_

 

_“Good,” Mrs. Hwang took a deep breath before continuing. “The reason I’m asking is because these parts should’ve been finished a week ago. We still haven’t gotten to the more tedious part of your thesis, and there’s only two months left before this semester ends.”_

 

_Ah, yes, that revision. Sana already started on it the moment Mrs. Hwang asked her to, but she can’t seem to focus. The only thing—or person, rather—that constantly clouds her mind is Dahyun. When is she going to meet Dahyun again, has she eaten already, are they going to eat dinner together, is she going to sleep by her side again tonight. It gets worse when Dahyun is around. Even though they would plan on studying together and boost each other’s morale, they would just end up teasing each other, asking for each other’s attention in a not-so-subtle manner, leaving the desk cluttered with papers and readings forgotten while they enjoy each other’s presence._

 

_It was somehow like she’s addicted, and Dahyun is her drug._

 

_Sana can already feel a lump forming on her throat, her palms became sweatier than it did just minutes ago. She doesn’t have the courage to look at Mrs. Hwang’s eyes so she just fixated her gaze on the coffee mug on Mrs. Hwang’s desk while she continued talking._

 

_“Not only that, you’ve been frequently late at passing your papers in the majors I am handling, and the quality of the outputs you give are not satisfactory as well. Your quizzes and exams were noticeably lower too than your previous semesters. You’ve been a student of mine every semester and I gotta say, I’m a bit shocked and disappointed. I’ve expected more from you.”_

 

_Mrs. Hwang heaved a sigh and took her glasses off to wipe it clean. “You’re a candidate for this year’s graduation, right?”_

 

_“Yes, ma’am.”_

 

_“Then you need to gather your thoughts together, Sana. As your adviser, I can only help as much. Most of it—the determination, consistency, and focus—it all has to come from you. This is your grades and your thesis. We, your professors, are only here to educate, correct and guide you.”_

 

_“Yes, ma’am.” It seems like it’s the only reply she can come up with right this moment._

 

_“If you really want to graduate this year, I’m gonna need you to really concentrate, get rid of everything that hinders you from focusing. You still have a chance to save your fluctuating grades, and we just need to adjust the deadlines I’ve previously set for your thesis.” Mrs. Hwang shifted her attention to her laptop, the sound of keyboard typing and mouse clicking filling the silence in the room._

 

_After they were done discussing the adjustments and new deadlines, she got up and bowed goodbye before leaving the room._

 

_Her steps just became heavier while she was on her way to the bus stop._

 

_‘Get rid of everything that hinders you from focusing.’_

 

_When she reached the bus stop, she took a seat, her mind preoccupied with the memories she had with Dahyun._

 

_Her contagious laugh. Her cute, soft chin. Her dorky antics and randomness. Her soft, warm hands and slender fingers that seem to fit perfectly in the gaps of her own. Her eyes that draws her in every single time._

 

_When she would hear her purr in the middle of her sleep sometimes. When Dahyun would always get up in the morning to prepare her breakfast and coffee, even though her classes don’t start until 10AM. When Dahyun would just sit there and breathe, and she would leave her speechless and amazed, about how had she come to bump into this precious girl at some point in her life. When they would just wander around the campus in the wee hours of the night, hiding from the campus police patrolling around. When they would debate about trivial things, or have discussions about politics and philosophy._

 

_‘I want you to stay in my life, Sana.’_

 

_As soon as those words came up on her mind once again, her eyes started to water and her lips began to quiver. Not long after, tears had begun to stream down her face, not giving a single f*ck if people around her would notice._

 

_“I don’t deserve you…”_

 

_Two buses have already passed by, but Sana just stayed there, hoping that Dahyun would just magically appear, hug her tight, and the time would suddenly stop for the two of them._

 

_But time doesn’t stop for anybody._

 

_‘Will you stay with me?’_

 

_She searched for her phone inside her bag when it started ringing. As she looked at the caller ID and saw that goofy smile, she felt even worse._

 

_“I’m so sorry, Dahyun…” she whispered to herself before throwing the phone back inside her bag, completely ignoring the ringing._

 

_She just stayed there and stared at the sunset, wishing that Dahyun was beside her, so they could admire its beauty together._

 

_But even if she did, nothing would change. No matter how much Dahyun stays close to her, she is still unreachable, far from Sana’s grasp. And when she graduates, it wouldn’t be too long until Dahyun finds someone new, someone she truthfully deserves._

 

_Dahyun is unreachable, and from now on, she has to accept that it will remain that way._

 

_\--_

 

**_Dahyun_ ** _(5:32): Heeeey_

**_Dahyun_ ** _(5:45): I just had a cute groupmate today in my Statistics class. Could’ve added her to the long list of crushes I have but she’s a freeloader so no thank you_

**_Dahyun_ ** _(6:13): U still busy? Or are u sleeping?_

**_Dahyun_ ** _(6:45): Sanaaaa wake upppp~ don’t make me come there and shower you w kisses until you wake up :)_

**_Dahyun_ ** _(7:04): Jeongyeon and I are going to that Ramen place you love. Wanna come with?_

 

**_Sana_ ** _(7:07): No, I’m good. I have to start my revisions for my thesis._

 

**_Dahyun_ ** _(7:08): Hey you’re up! Were you sleeping earlier? I missed you…._

**_Dahyun_ ** _(7:15): Are you okay?_

 

**_Sana_ ** _(7:18): Of course. :)_

 

**_Dahyun_ ** _(7:20): U sure? You seem a little… off… Anyway, do you need help? I’m free for the day. Maybe I can buy you a bowl of ramen to-go c:_

 

**_Sana_ ** _(7:23): No thanks, I’m fine. Stay with Jeong. I’m gonna study now._

 

**_Dahyun_ ** _(7:25): Ooookaaay. Good luck, princess! Don’t fall asleep. :* I… will see you tomorrow. :)_

 

_This is getting harder every single second._

 

_\--_

 

_“Wrong. You messed up on the second step again. After dividing both sides by 2, cancel this out…” Jeongyeon carefully guided Dahyun in solving a take-home worksheet from her Algebra class. She pretty much zones out every time Jeongyeon corrects her mistakes, that’s why this is the fifth time Jeongyeon’s been teaching her the correct way of solving for x. Basically Jeongyeon answered about half of the worksheet before she smacked Dahyun in the forehead._

 

_“What’s wrong with you? This is basic algebra. Are you acting dumb so you can make me answer all of this for you? You can’t fool me, Kim Dahyun.”_

 

_Dahyun sighed for the nth time. It’s been five days since she received a decent text from Sana, and she wasn’t able to at least get a glimpse of her too. Sana isn’t on their apartment whenever she visits. Momo is not much of a help either, because she doesn’t know Sana’s whereabouts as well._

 

_“She would just tell me she’s heading out, and that’s it,” Momo would say._

 

_That weird feeling has been sitting on her chest ever since that last text conversation she had with Sana. She already sensed something was off, but she dismissed it immediately, thinking that Sana might be just really stressed and busy at the moment, so she tried not texting her too much. But the feeling gets heavier as seconds pass by._

 

_“Sorry. I uh, just wondering what Sana is doing right now.”_

 

_“Why can’t you just ask her?”_

 

_“That’s the thing. She won’t reply to my texts. When she does, all I get are one-liner replies. I’m starting to get worried.”_

 

_Jeongyeon dropped the pen and firmly grasped Dahyun’s shoulders, making her turn to face her. “I don’t know what’s going on, she’s probably just busy or whatever, but you need to talk to her about this as soon as possible. Ask her to have dinner. Or wait for her in their apartment. If she’s been ignoring you, then confront her about it. And while you’re at it, both of you should DTR.”_

 

_“DTR?”_

 

_“Define the relationship.”_

 

_“Ohh,” Dahyun nodded at the new knowledge in dating terms. “Yeah, you’re right. I’ll try to talk to her tomorrow.”_

 

_“Good,” Jeongyeon patted her shoulders and stood up. “For now, finish that. I ain’t gonna do that for you because if I do that, how will you learn? Academic excellence comes first!” she exclaimed, earning a scoff from the latter. “Hey… I’m assigned to clean the bathroom tomorrow. You do it and I’ll give you three answers._

 

_“No thank you, missy. I ain’t cleaning for you.” Dahyun picked the pen up and started writing on her paper for solutions._

 

_\--_

 

_Momo pumped her fist in the air for the third time._

 

_“Huzzah! Who’s the ‘unbeatable’ gamer? Not you!” Momo taunted as she rejoiced for winning the third round against Mina in Tekken._

 

_Mina scoffed in response. “Don’t get too cocky about your streak yet, Momoring. You aren’t the winner yet. Best of 5, remember?”_

 

_“Yeah, but scoreboard’s 3-0 and I only see nothing but glory ahead tonight. You’re going down! Hahaha!” Momo sat back beside Mina again and reached for her console. They had this bet—best of 5 at Tekken VII, loser pays for everything on their date in Jeju next week. And bragging rights for Momo, since Mina is known to be a great gamer whether it’s console or PC._

 

_“Calm your ass down and let’s start with the fourth round,” Mina retorted, her focus a lot more heightened than before. Her pride is at stake here. Her money too._

 

_The heat from the game made them not notice that Sana came about five minutes ago. She silently sipped on her glass of water while she watched the two actively doing everything to disturb one another while playing._

 

_How cute._

 

_“HA! 3-1! Say goodbye to your short-lived streak, loser!” Mina dropped the console to her folded legs and raised her hands up in the air._

 

_“Yeah? Not so fast? How about this!” Momo swiftly attacked Mina’s armpits with tickles, gaining uncontrollable laughs from the girl._

 

_“AH! Stop Momo—hahahaha! STOP IT!” The girl continuously begged for mercy, but Momo is nowhere near giving her any as she pulled her other hand to attack Mina’s tummy._

 

_“You know, if this leads to what I think it will lead to, then you better do that in your own room. I wanna watch TV,” Sana barged in and sat on the other end of the couch, not minding the chaos that is going on beside her._

 

_Momo finally let go of Mina who’s now gasping for air, her hair sticking to her forehead due to sweat. “Just a second. If you help me beat Mina for the next two rounds, you can have the TV all to yourself. Tickle her while we’re playing!” she told Sana, who was just shaking her head in response._

 

_“If you want to beat Mina, you’re gonna do it all by yourself. Plus I want to see the look on your face when Mina gets to win in the end.”_

 

_“Sana! Money’s at stake here! Do you really want your bestfriend to go broke?”_

 

_“Yes. It’ll be entertaining to see.”_

 

_Momo frowned and glared, whilst Mina gave Sana a high-five. She watches as the two continued their battle for greatness—which later on resulted to Mina turning the tables, winning once again._

 

_“Aaaaaahhhh! Why are you so good?! It’s unfair!” Momo cried out in frustration, but was silenced by a quick peck on the lips from Mina. She goofily smiled, then stuck her tongue out to tease the girl._

 

_“You lose.”_

 

_“Mina, stop sticking your tongue out or else…”_

 

_“Or else what?”_

 

_“Oh my god can you not do this in front of me? Geez,” Sana gave the two a pair of judging eyes while she was setting the TV mode back to the channels. She settled on watching the latest episode of Doctors. She has always had this crush on Park Shin Hye. While Momo was unplugging the PS4, Mina went to the bathroom for a quick break._

 

_“By the way, Dahyun’s been looking for you since Monday. You guys okay?” Momo asked while twirling up the wires from the PS4 and the consoles before returning it to the box._

 

_“Oh. Yeah. Don’t worry about it.”_

 

_“You’re lying.”_

 

_“How did you know?”_

 

_“I didn’t. You just told me now.” Momo smirked, knowing that her tactic worked. She stood up in front of Sana, entirely blocking her view of the TV._

 

_“So, what is it?” Momo had her hands on her hips, tapping her foot impatiently._

 

_Sana sighed. This is one of the things she’s been trying to avoid, among other things. She gulped and looked at her. “Momo, you’re my best friend, so I am sure you’ll understand if I say that I don’t want to talk about it right now.”_

 

_Momo studied Sana’s face and all she saw was a pair of soulless, tired eyes. She clicked her tongue and decided to let it go for now._

 

_“Fine. But if you want to talk about it, you know who to call.”_

 

_“Yes, of course.”_

 

_Mina emerged from the bathroom, dabbing her face with a towel after washing it. There was a serious atmosphere between the two, but she decided to shrug it off. “Where are we going to eat, babe?”_

 

_“Hmm. Wanna go to that noodle place near Hyesun’s Pizza?”_

 

_“Oh yes! They serve great desserts. Let’s hit that one. I’ll get my stuff.” Mina said before walking towards Momo’s bedroom._

 

_“How about you, Sana? Want me to order you something?” Momo asked._

 

_“No, I’m good.”_

 

_Sana waited for them to get ready and leave the apartment, and fortunately for her Mina is not like those other girls who take centuries preparing before heading out. With one last goodbye, the door shut close. She just sat there and watched the series, but her mind is clearly off to somewhere else. A phone vibrated on the coffee table, but it wasn’t hers._

 

_“Ugh. Momo forgot her phone again,” she whispered to herself and just ignored it to continue watching. Minutes later, a knock was heard from the door. Might be Momo coming back for her phone, she thought._

 

_“Wait!” Sana yelled, grabbing the phone from the table before running towards the door and twisting it open._

 

_“Why do you keep on forgetting your pho—“ Sana was taken aback at the unexpected visitor. Oh how she wished it was Momo._

 

_“Hey,” Dahyun greeted with a faint smile. To be honest, she wasn’t expecting Sana to be the one to open the door, because for the past days she’s been going here, the girl’s always nowhere to be found. Maybe she got lucky tonight._

 

_“Hey. What are you doing here?” Sana asked, panic surging through her veins._

 

_“Checking up on you. And… I also want to talk to you.” Dahyun’s gaze was unwavering, and Sana can’t stand to look back anymore, for every second she does is torture._

 

_“But I’m busy.”_

 

_“Please?”_

 

_“Dahyun—“_

 

_“I’m not leaving this building until we talk.” Dahyun firmly said._

 

_Sana returned her gaze and saw the desperation in Dahyun’s eyes. There’s no way she’s gonna let Dahyun stay out there all night, and it looks like she can’t talk her out to just go home._

 

_“Fine.” Sana stepped aside to give way for Dahyun to enter._

 

_“Please make it quick, I really do have a lot to do,” she mumbled as she shut the door close._

 

_“Why are you ignoring me?” Dahyun turned towards Sana and asked straightforwardly, her tone full of confusion and a little bit of pain._

 

_“I’m not.” Sana replied, head hung low, eyes fixated on the white tiles of the floor. He heart twitched when she heard Dahyun scoff, like she can totally see through the lie she just spat out._

 

_“Really? Because it’s been about five days since I heard from you. You don’t respond to my texts, and when you do, you give me one-liner replies. You’re always not here when I come over. You don’t answer my calls. Explain to me how those things not translate to you not wanting to be bothered by my presence.”_

 

_Sana took a deep breath and exhaled heavily. She knew this is coming, that at some point, Dahyun’s going to confront her about it, but even when she knew about it earlier she didn’t seem to prepare herself for it._

 

_“Is there something wrong?”_

 

_“Nothing. I’m fine.”_

 

_“But I’m not, Sana!” Dahyun bellowed. The five days of overthinking and suppressing her feelings has led to this—her emotions exploding all over and there’s no stopping it anymore. The lack of response from the older girl just made everything worse._

 

_“I don’t know what’s happening with you, or if—if I did something wrong, but all those days that you’ve been ignoring me is torture, Sana. I know you’re busy, and I’d give you space if you need to, but is there really a need to disregard me at all? I think and worry about you all the time, and I don’t even know if you think about what I’m feeling too! It—it hurts me, to think that you possibly don’t care at all.”_

 

_There was no response from the older girl, who just kept on biting her lower lip hard, slightly trembling because she has never seen Dahyun this mad to anyone before. She’s always this forgiving and understanding girl, that’s why the magnitude of this whole situation just keep on getting heavier._

 

_“What are we, exactly?”_

 

_No answer._

 

_“What am I to you? A fucking cigarette? Something you toss after it’s done giving you temporary comfort, a little escape from reality? Is that what I am? Temporary and disposable?” Dahyun was on the verge of tears, but she’s not the type to cry in front of people so she tried her best to hold it back._

 

_“Stop, Dahyun.”_

 

_“Oh, you don’t get to tell me to stop now, Sana. Because I’m already more than knee deep into this whatever kinda shit we have going on between us that is certainly more than friendship and I’m not gonna leave until you put answer to my questions!”_

 

_Sana cannot take it anymore. The stabs to her heart everytime she hears Dahyun’s voice cracking, the accusations, the confrontation. Both of them are already on the edge and the more Dahyun speaks of her feelings make her a hundred times worse than ever._

 

_“You want a straight answer? Fine. I don’t want to see you anymore. I don’t want any of this you think we have anymore. I have my own priorities, and it’s about damn time I focus on them. Now is that enough answer for you, or do I need to tell you more?”_

 

_Now it was Dahyun’s turn to stay mum. Her chest felt constricting, heart about to burst, and it’s getting hard to breathe. Her nails started digging crescent-shaped marks on her palms as she clenched her fists. She refused to believe what she just heard, thinking that her ears were just deceiving her, but all of this were very much real._

 

_“What are you saying?”_

 

_“Please leave, Dahyun. I need to start studying now.” Sana coldly replied, still not looking at Dahyun, because she knows what she said greatly inflicted pain on the younger girl. She needs to dismiss her now before she can’t control herself anymore._

 

_Dahyun lifelessly walked towards the door, but halting once she got closer to Sana._

 

_“I can’t believe you.” Dahyun mumbled, tears starting to fall down from her eyes, staining her cheeks with trails of wetness. Sana finally looked at her, and she swore she was about to die on the spot from the pang of guilt she’s feeling in her chest._

 

_“You were wrong about me, Dahyun.”_

 

_Dahyun wasn’t able to come up of anything to reply, like every single word she wants to spit were trapped in her throat. She twisted the door knob and banged the door close, a stern look on her face, but the trail of tears didn’t stop from running down no matter how hard Dahyun tries to wipe it out. She walked out of the building, and then ran as fast she could—away from that place, away from all the memories, away from her._

 

_Meanwhile, Sana was left standing there, unmoving, still dazed from everything that just happened. And it was not long after she slowly collapsed into the floor while hugging her knees to cry her heart out, like a huge part of her just died. She felt immensely sorry and guilty by the way she treated Dahyun, but it’s the only thing she can think of to convince Dahyun to leave._

 

_How does that song from Panic! At The Disco go? “If you love me, let me go.”_

 

_It was what she deemed is necessary to do._

 

_\--_

 

_“Thought you stopped smoking?”_

 

_“I thought so too.”_

 

_“I heard of what happened. Care to explain?”_

 

_“I just did what I have to do.”_

 

_They were out in the small terrace, Sana on her sixth cigarette stick for the night while Momo only had one. She came home to this, Sana sitting on their small terrace’s floor, a cigarette in one hand, a bottle of vodka in the other. Her eyes were swollen, cheeks still stained with tears, her gaze lost somewhere far away._

 

_“But why? I thought you guys were doing really well.”_

 

_“Life got in the way, Momo. You know I need to graduate this year. My parents are gonna send me back to Japan if I don’t, and they’d probably not allow me to go back if they find out it’s because of a romantic relationship. With a girl.”_

 

_“Well… you could’ve talked to her nicer about that. You didn’t have to be a full-on bitch on her.”_

 

_“And what? Do you not know Dahyun? She’s just gonna say that everything’s going to be okay, that it will all work out. If I let her talk me into it just so I would stay, there’s a high chance that I’d believe it. But I know it won’t, Momo. When I graduate, we can’t meet more often. We’re both going to be busy. She’s gonna meet new people, people who would love her and she deserves nothing more than that.”_

 

_Momo paused for a while to get another stick from the box and lighted it up. “And you don’t trust her?”_

 

_“I don’t trust myself. Whenever I’m with her, I shut down everything, like she’s the only thing that matters,” Sana sighed, taking another drag from the cigarette stick. “This seed thing she planted in my heart is so beautiful yet very dangerous. I’m… I’m going to die if I let it grow.”_

 

_A sigh could be heard from Momo. It’s not her problem, yes, but the two are very close to her and knowing that both of them had mutual feelings yet life keeps getting in their way is frustrating for her._

 

_“I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m gonna say this with love—I’m sorry Sana, you’re a coward. You’re a coward for not trusting yourself, for not trusting Dahyun that she’s going to help you through everything, and for not trusting that the two of you can overcome whatever the future’s going to haul towards your path.”_

 

_She wanted Sana to get mad at her, to scream for accusing her, but all she got was a quiet laugh of indifference._

 

_“You’re right. More the reasons why I don’t deserve her love.”_

 

_Momo blew out a heavy smoke into the air, watching it as it slowly dissipates into the atmosphere. It seems like she can’t really do anything to change Sana’s decision, and she can only do much as her best friend. At the end of the day, she’s just there to stay by her side and offer a shoulder to cry on if she needed to._

 

_“This is better than the possibility of not seeing her anymore, Momo. At least I can stay and watch her from afar.”_

 

_“Well,” Momo pressed the cigarette to the ashtray to kill its light before tossing the butt into the can. “Bid her goodbye at least.”_

 

_“I will try.”_

 

_Momo dusted her shirt of cigarette ash before giving Sana a tight hug. “I know you’re strong, so just hold on, okay? Let time do its job.” She kissed Sana’s forehead, which earned a light smile from the latter._

 

_“I know.” Sana replied._

 

_“Jeongyeon handed me a bag full of your stuff from their apartment. It’s on the table.” Momo said as she broke the hug. “I’ll be in my room if you need anything. Stop drinking and go rest.” She snatched the vodka bottle from the girl’s hand, and luckily she didn’t protest._

 

_If nothing goes right, go to sleep._

 

_\--_

 

_It was already 9 in the evening when the graduation ceremony ended. The whole field was crowded with graduates with their families and friends. The overall atmosphere in the event was joyous and gleeful, but Sana just isn’t feeling it today. Her parents weren’t able to come because of their busy work schedules, in which she scoffed because they could’ve just said that they didn’t want to come than come up with a ridiculous excuse. Luckily Momo’s parents were able to come and volunteered to come up with her on stage to receive her medal and diploma. She could only laugh at how Momo and Mina introduced each other as ‘close friend’ to their parents._

 

_“Momo, call your friends! We’ll take a picture of you!” Momo’s mom exclaimed in their mother tongue, getting the camera ready._

 

_Momo called Jeongyeon, Nayeon, and Jihyo out and motioned them to go near them, gesturing that her parents want to take a picture. The three quickly came over, their parents taking their phones out too to capture some pictures of their daughters with their college friends._

 

_“1, 2, 3, smile! Another one!”_

 

_Sana wasn’t sure if she was able to smile on the second one, because she just caught a glimpse of Dahyun talking to Chaeyoung at the back._

 

_‘Bid her goodbye at least,’ she recalled Momo telling her._

 

_After they were done with the picture taking, she took a deep breath and walked towards Dahyun, only to be stopped by a hand grabbing her shoulders._

 

_“Don’t even think about it, Sana.”_

 

_She turned around to see the stern look on Jeongyeon’s face. Her grip was firm, but she loosened it up eventually when the latter got her message._

 

_“I just want to say one last goodbye.”_

 

_“You already did that two months ago, remember?”_

 

_Sana bit her lip at the memory while she stared at Dahyun’s faint laugh from Chaeyoung’s joke from afar._

 

_“I know you’re still mad at me, and that there’s probably no need for me to say this, but please take care of her always.”_

 

_“Duh. I’m her best friend. I’ve been doing that for years, even before she met you.” Jeongyeon coldly spat out before walking towards the two to join them grab something to eat at the convenience store nearby. Sana stood there rooted in her spot, as she watched the three walked farther, hoping that even just for a millisecond that Dahyun would glance back, but she doesn’t._

 

_This is how it’s always going to be. Her looking out and guiding Dahyun from afar. Her watching and smiling at Dahyun’s accomplishments from afar._

 

_Her, loving Dahyun from afar._

 

\--

a/n: Heyo! How are you all guys doing? I missed you all! Sorry for not being able to update for about two months, there were personal things I had to focus on first. Anyway, here's a continuation of the flashback! Lemme hear your thoughts by leaving your comments below! Have a great day! <3 


	11. We're Doing Pretty Good

8:34 A.M.

 

Tzuyu huffed once again as she wrapped up another phone call. 34 minutes has passed and the sheer amount of stress from literally everyone and everything today is setting her on an awful mood. From the heavy traffic, bumping into a guy that almost made her spill her morning coffee, the unusually larger pile of folders and papers that greeted her the moment she reaches her office desk... which was probably because Sana wasn't present at her office.

 

Minatozaki Sana, who takes time as one of the most precious things in this world, was nowhere to be found. 

 

She's never gone to work earlier than Sana. Not even when Sana is evidently sick, not even when Sana would stay up all night for her reports. Not in forever, except today. 

 

Marching towards the break room, Tzuyu grabbed a paper cup to drink some water. She didn't even bother to say hi to the two guys, Wonpil and Brian from the Creative Department, chatting beside the sink while finishing up their coffees. The two halted their conversation to observe her, who's muttering things under her breath. Wonpil walked towards Tzuyu and stuck his thumb and index fingers between her eyebrows to spread her scrunched eyebrows apart. He chuckled when the latter just pouted at him.

 

"Bad morning, I see?" He asked, reaching for a piece of banana on the counter. Tzuyu sighed and drank the cold water before throwing the cup into the bin. 

 

"Yeah. Everything literally pisses me off right now. And there's my boss who's about 40 minutes late and wouldn't even bother to send me a text of her whereabouts. Out of all days to slack, she chooses this day! She has three client meetings! Three! What was she thinking!" she continued to grumble, leaving Wonpil a bit taken aback at the sudden mini outburst, while Jae chortled. 

 

"Call her, perhaps? Maybe her alarm didn't go off. Or she probably got stuck on the heavy traffic." Jae suggested. 

 

Tzuyu nodded and mouthed a quick 'thanks' before marching towards her desk to grab her phone. Before she could make it to her desk, she saw Sana who just entered her office. She grabbed the folders and papers from the desk and reached the door just before it closes. Tzuyu slid inside the room, and the presence made Sana turn to her direction.

 

"Oh, hey, good morning." Sana said with a cheeky smile. This only irritated Tzuyu more, because how can someone have the audacity to still greet her a 'good morning' despite being more than half an hour late? With a smile? 

 

"Good morning? You're late! Not 5 minutes late, 40! What's gotten into you?" Tzuyu dropped the folders onto Sana's desk before crossing her arms on her chest, an eyebrow arched as she waited for an answer.

 

Sana knew Tzuyu's gonna be pissed off at her--Tzuyu hates irresponsible people. She breathed in before speaking. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I slept late last night and I wasn't able to set my alarm--" Sana's explanation was cut off by a text message. She stuck out her index finger up, gesturing Tzuyu to wait while she checked the text message. Reading the name from the screen gave her a wide smile.

 

_**Kim Dahyun** _ _(8:48): Good morning to you too. I just woke up, just about to eat breakfast. You?_

 

Sana quickly typed in her reply, ignoring the stare her friend's giving her. She continued speaking as soon as she was done. "So uh, yeah, I got no alarm. What's up?"

 

"Why did you sleep late then? Did you get laid? Is that why you can't wipe off that stupid smile on your face?" 

 

"What? No! No," Sana let out a little laugh. She knows she shouldn't be laughing but she can't help it, the accusation sounded foolish and Tzuyu's mild outburst is kind of adorable. "Remember the girl I told you about? My old friend?"

 

Now Tzuyu's ears perked up at the mention of Sana's 'old friend'. "What about her?" 

 

"Well," Sana sat on her black swivel chair. "We talked to each other last Saturday, and we're in good terms now. I kinda stayed up late because we we're catching up through text messages. Meaningless sex doesn't make me happy, receiving forgiveness does." 

 

"Hah. I'd congratulate you, but we have no time for chit-chats. Miss Jung's assistant called, he said you need to revise the proposal before you present it later at 9:30, Meeting Room A. Take note of these," Tzuyu pointed at a piece of paper clipped on a folder with the business proposal inside it. "You have less than 40 minutes left, dumbass. Next time, pick the least stressful day to slack." Tzuyu turned her back and walked towards the door, but she spoke once again before turning it.

 

"You'd have to ask for my forgiveness too, by the way. I had to cover up for you when Ms. Choi peeped in your empty office." Tzuyu flipped her hair backwards before finally exiting the room. Sana sighed, she can deal with Tzuyu later. She's sure it's nothing a bagel and a cup of her favorite cappuccino can't fix. 

 

Usually, Sana would be seriously irritated if she's being forced to do things on a rush, especially if she's done nothing wrong. Sure, she can still work and deliver quality output despite under heavy pressure, and she's learned to get used to it to cater to the demands of her clients and her boss, but it just throws her off. This is why she prefer planning and doing things ahead of time (although she misses sometimes because stress takes a toll on her too). But for some reason, not even a 40-minute time pressure can kill the pleasant mood she has today.

 

Opening a saved document of the proposal on her computer, a 'ding' was heard from her phone once again.

 

_**Kim Dahyun** _ _(8:57): Had bacons and bread for breakfast. Will be preparing now or else my mom’s gonna kill me. Have a great day ahead. :)_

 

She certainly will.

 

\--

 

Mina snapped out of her daydream when the smell of slightly-burnt pancakes hit her nose. They went home a bit late from the arcade Momo used to go to and since she was basically friends with every worker there, they took the chance to play in every single machine and even managed to bring a huge poop hammer in exchange for the tickets they collected. Of course it was Momo who chose it. 

 

After putting two pancakes on a plate, she turned the electric stove off and walked towards their room to wake Momo up. She cackled at the sight—Momo had her knees planted on the bed, her buttocks pushed upward while the left side of her face was buried on the pillow. Mina was pretty sure she was on a more normal sleeping position before she came out. Grabbing the green lightsaber toy beside the dresser, she playfully poked Momo’s butt, in which the latter responded with a groan. Momo mindlessly tried to swat the thing that’s been poking her butt but to no avail. She finally opened her eyes and glanced back to see Mina stifling her laughter while continuing the poking attack. She let out another groan and rolled to the other side of the bed along with the thick blanket, making her look like a human burrito.

 

“Momoring, get up. Breakfast is ready.” Mina dropped the saber toy and hopped over the bed and hugged Momo. The latter sighed in comfort.

 

“5 minutes…” she muttered. If history’s any indication, it won’t be such a good idea because 5 minutes would actually mean 30 and Mina doesn’t want to get stuck on Monday traffic.

 

“No. Get up.”

 

When there was no response from the other girl, Mina stood up to grab her phone. She played on some party music in its maximum volume and jumped on the bed, continuously bouncing on it, even sitting on Momo’s body. Momo finally opened her eyes when Mina put her phone’s speaker right beside her ear.

 

“Ugh, okay stop! I’m up!” Momo covered her ear in irritation and sat up. She quickly searched for her bunny slippers underneath the bed and just when she was about to stand up, Mina held her back by the waist.

 

“Kiss?” Mina asked, peeking out from behind to face Momo. The latter was too sleepy to respond, and she didn’t exactly like how abrupt Mina woke her up so she shook her head and stood up.

 

“I’m gonna shower.” She murmured, leaving a puzzled Mina sitting on the bed. She only followed Momo’s walking figure with her eyes until she shot the door close.

 

“Alright! I’ll wait for you so we can eat together!” Mina shouted. She made the bed and went outside to cover the plate before watching the news on TV.

 

Their weekday mornings are usually: Momo taking a bath first while Mina’s cooking their breakfast, eat breakfast together. After eating and having their morning coffees, it’s Mina’s turn to shower while Momo washes the dishes. There are times when they would shower together. Momo would always reason out that it does save water usage and time, but they both know that it’s not the #1 reason on the list.

 

It’s been a while since they’ve showered together, Mina thought.

 

And so she turned the TV off and walked towards the bathroom. She carefully twisted the doorknob, sliding inside silently so Momo wouldn’t hear. When she was closing the door, the shower suddenly stopped.

 

“Mina?” Momo called out. She then peeped out of the shower curtain, her head still full of bubble foam, only to see Mina tossing her shirt to the laundry basket.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Why are you here?”

 

“Uh, why not?”

 

“No, you can’t shower with me.” Momo frowned as she drew the shower curtain close again and twisted the shower faucet.

 

Mina slightly chuckled, sensing that she did piss Momo off by the way she woke her up earlier. She slid the shower curtain to the side, making Momo screech in shock.

 

“Agh! Perv!” Momo threw her hands over her exposed private parts, which weren’t much of a help anyway.

 

“So you’re pissed off?” There goes Mina’s first bullet—pouting. Momo only raised an eyebrow.

 

“I’m not gonna fall for that today.”

 

“Really? Well,” Mina reached for the band of her pajamas and slowly slid them down all while looking directly into Momo’s eyes. After she’s tossed it in the basket, she smirked. “You still won’t let me in?”

 

The blonde sighed and turned the shower off. “You know I don’t like being woken up abruptly, right?”

 

“Yes, I know, and I’m sorry.” Mina replied. “Do you want me to make it up to you?”

 

A light smirk tugged on Momo’s lips as she approached Mina, her hands resting on top of the band of her underwear.

 

“We’re running out of time so… I’ll think about it first.”

 

\--

 

The traffic wasn’t at its heaviest when Dahyun and her parents hit the road. They left the house just around the hour when the rush hour has already subsided. It was a 2-hour drive at most, so Dahyun decided to capitalize on the duration by catching some more sleep. With her favorite neck pillow, and ‘Northern Downpour’ playing on her headphones, it took her just less than five minutes to doze off. She tried catching up on Sense8 last night and while it was not the greatest idea when she knew they’re gonna leave early in the morning, she didn’t regret it. Well because it’s Sense8.

 

She woke up at the continuous tapping on her knee.

 

“Sweetie, we’re here. Wake up.” Mrs. Kim said before opening the car door.

 

As they went out the car, they were immediately greeted by her grandma’s gardener, who’s been working there for almost 10 years.  He assisted them with the grocery bags that is full of ingredients for the dishes her mom and her grandmother will cook for the celebration. Dahyun looked around and scanned the surroundings. There are two other cars parked at the other side of the house, so she assumed her other relatives are already here. As for the house itself, nothing much has changed for the last three years since they visited. Same pathway, same garden rich in different kinds of plants and flowers, same creaky three-leveled wooden stairs that leads to the main door, same warmth she receives from her grandmother as soon as they enter the house.

 

“There they are!” her grandmother exclaimed, walking towards them with her arms opened.

 

“Happy birthday, mom!” Mr. and Mrs. Kim greeted as they exchanged hugs. Dahyun did a 90-degree bow in respect before greeting.

 

“Happy birthday, grandma.”

 

“Ow, my little girl! Thank you, and congratulations on the graduation, honey. I am so proud of you.” Her grandma hugged and kissed her forehead before they walked towards the living room.

 

It felt like a mini family reunion. Her aunts and uncles are already there, busy chatting and catching up while their kids play and swim outside. Mr. and Mrs. Kim joined the adults, and after she’s greeted them, she went out to check on her cousins. Dahyun isn’t really close with most of her relatives so she doesn’t know any of their names.

 

“Oi.” A finger tapped her shoulder, so she turned around to see a black-haired woman, almost the same height as her, wearing a red flannel and black denim shorts.

 

This one, she remembers.

 

“Taeyeon unnie!” she exclaimed as she threw her arms around the girl. Dahyun hasn’t seen her for almost seven years ever since attended a university in New York and also worked there after she graduated. Taeyeon just got back to Korea last summer and even then, they didn’t get to visit or meet each other because of their own prior commitments.

 

They were practically best buds in their childhood days. Most of the time when Mr. and Mrs. Kim won’t be around because of work, they would drop Dahyun off to their house so she can be supervised well, and also so she can have a playmate. Dahyun basically saw Taeyeon not only as a cousin, but also a big sister she didn’t have. The latter treated her dearly as well, as Taeyeon was also an only child. She would stand up for her when some kids on the playground would bully her, buy her ice cream and make her laugh when she’s down.

 

“Yes, I missed you too, Dahyun-ah.” Taeyeon returned the hug with the same excitement.

 

“I didn’t know you’d come here today. You’ve been pretty busy, huh?”

 

“Well, yeah. I already saved this date ever since grandma threatened me she’s never gonna cook me my favorite Hotteok if I don’t come.”

 

They sat on a wooden long chair beside the pool, observing the kids swimming and playing in the pool.

 

“So, did New York treat you well?” Dahyun asked. Everything she knows about Taeyeon during the time she’s away is only based on what she sees on her Facebook profile updates (which is also rare for Taeyeon), so she doesn’t know much about what she’s been up to.

 

“It was good. Hard to adjust at first, especially since I’m not exactly good with socializing, but I did get to meet different people and make new friends. Met a lot of Koreans in the university too.  After graduation, I along with a friend of mine whom I met at work decided to start a business. We both saved up to start our own club. We both like partying and I haven’t gone to any clubs in Seoul that fitted my taste so I created my own haven. Heard of Night Haze yet?”

 

Dahyun tries to recall if she knows a club called “Night Haze” before. Some students in the university, especially the party animals probably do, but she’s not exactly a party goer so she can’t remember hearing about it. “No, I’ve only heard about it when you mentioned it. Where’s it located anyway?”

 

“It’s on Hongdae, just around Seogyo-dong. We just had its grand opening last summer. I DJ there too sometimes, when I’m in the mood. You and your friends should come by sometime, I can treat you some drinks and a VIP room. Just tell the guards at the entrance that you’re with me.” Taeyeon offered. Like Dahyun, she also majored in Business Administration. She almost forgot that Taeyeon was pretty serious about her hobby of DJ-ing ever since they were young. Sometimes when she visits their house, she’d find Taeyeon inside her room, headphones on her head, playing with her turntables.

 

“Taengoo! Help me with the salad!” Her mom shouted, and it was her cue to leave. Taeyeon patted Dahyun’s back and gave her one last smile.

 

“We’ll continue catching up later, aight?” She stood up before rushing towards the kitchen.

 

And so she decided to go upstairs on the unoccupied guest room. After plopping down the thick mattress, her eyes stared at the mahogany-colored ceiling. She hasn’t thought of any plans yet after she graduates, and seeing how Taeyeon is thriving, maybe it’s time to start setting her goals.

 

The vibration on her pocket disturbed her. Fishing out her phone, she saw an unread message from Jeongyeon and opened it.

 

**_Jeong_ ** _(11:43): Tell me why cat poops smell so damn horrible. I hate myself for leaving one window open._

**_Dubu_ ** _(11:45): CTFUUUU u dumbass did you clean it up already? Also what are you still doing there? It’s Monday bitch don’t u have work_

**_Jeong_ ** _(11:50): caught a fever so I’m on sick leave. This is not good for my condition I CANT FIND WHERE IT IS THE ENTIRE APARTMENT SMELLS SHIT RIGHT NOW I CANT BREATHTE_

**_Dubu_ ** _(11:52): Try looking inside your shoes_

**_Jeong_ ** _(11:57): OH MY FUCKING GOD IT POOPED INSIDE MY SHOE!!! MY NEW SHOE!! Why did it poop on MY shoe, your old chucks in here looks more bathroom-ey_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:01): Hah, thanks for insulting my favorite chucks, idiot. Now you’re not getting any sympathy from me_

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:15): shut up I know you’d say the same if this happened to you_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:17): no bitch im a good friend_

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:20): btw how’s the movie marathon last Saturday at Momo’s? wasn’t able to come since I had to visit my dad_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:23): it was fine. Chaeyoung and Momo kept on hitting each other with lightsabers_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:24): also Sana was there_

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:30): …oookaaay, did something happen?_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:32): we uhh… we talked._

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:35): OHHH Really?? In Momo’s apartment? What’d they do_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:38): No, we drove to a café near Han. She explained her side and apologized._

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:41): Huh… all of it’s a bit late but it’s better than never. What did you do?_

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:43): You forgave her didn’t u_

**_Dubu_ ** _(12:45): Yeah._

**_Jeong_ ** _(12:55): Well… are you sure you’re already over it? It doesn’t hurt you anymore?_

 

Dahyun stared at the ceiling once again and pondered. Is she? Was it too soon? Is she actually ready to start over a new friendship with Sana again?

 

What if she isn’t? What if—

 

**_Jeong_ ** _(1:04): You taking long to reply means you’re thinking about it now aren’t you_

**_Dubu_ ** _(1:06): I’m not. Let’s not overthink this, shall we_

**_Jeong_ ** _(1:08): Right. Anyway, I’m glad both of you already talked. Take it slow. You shouldn’t rush patching up a broken relationship. I’m sure both of you will eventually get there. Anyway, I’ll ttyl I gotta get rid of this awful smell and wash my shoe. Love u bitch_

**_Dubu_ ** _(1:26): Okay. Thanks dumbass love u too_

Just as soon as she wrapped up her conversation with Jeongyeon, a lot of concerns have started creeping up her mind.

 

So much for “not overthinking.” She curses inwardly at Jeongyeon for asking the _important_ questions.

 

She almost jumped from the bed in shock when Taeyeon knocked.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Hey. Let’s go downstairs. Celebration’s about to start.”

 

She stood up and brushed her shirt, burying her previous thoughts in the depths of her mind.

 

\--

 

Three bags of groceries were dropped onto the counter as Sana huffed from exhaustion. Her unit was up five floors and the elevator was under maintenance so she had no other choice but to use the stairs. She’s gotta hit the gym soon, she thought.

 

She reached for a remote and turned the CD player on, and after a short while Lana Del Rey’s ‘Born to Die’ album started playing. Sana sat on the couch and checked her phone to see 12 unread messages. She doesn’t exactly know why she felt giddy all of a sudden, so she unlocked it immediately to read them, only to see that they’re all work-related. The excitement quickly died down.

 

_It’s been four days…_ Sana thought. She scrolled down and opened her thread conversation with Dahyun. She stared at the exchange of goodnights for a while.

 

_Should I text her?_

 

With that thought, she typed in her carefully worded sentence.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(19:35): Hello! What’s up?_

_Lame._ Sana bit her lip as she deleted all of it to start over.

 

_“Hey :)”_ No. _”Good evening!”_ Too formal. _“Yo!”_ What the hell?

 

_“Dahyunnie?”_ She hovers her thumb over the send button, but quickly retreats. It’s been so long since she has called her that, so it might sound weird… and so she deleted it once again.

 

Normally, she’s great at starting conversations. And on that note, she shouldn’t be scrolling up and down this goddamn “10 Ways To Start and Maintain A Conversation” webpage. She sighed, none of these are helping. She decided to just type in whatever that comes into her mind.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(19:54): I want to be a cloud in the afterlife._

As soon as she pressed send, she knew she’d regret it immediately. Who the fuck opens a conversation with _that?_

 

Sana was already panicking, already typing a basic “I sent it by mistake” reason when the thread moved up.

 

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(19:56): People usually say dogs or flowers, so that’s interesting._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:00): Yeah… Haha… I just wanna know if they talk to each other._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:03): They’re probably just chilling up there. It’s windy too._

Sana chuckled. Dahyun’s still riding on her weird antics even until now, and that’s something delightful to know.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:05): How about you?_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:08): Me? Hmm. Skyscraper, probably._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:11): So you’d know how being tall feels like? Hehe._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:13): Goodbye_

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:15): I’m just joking,, what are you doing anyway_

She stood up and grabbed a metal stool to sit on the small terrace. The night sky’s pretty nice tonight, stars hiding behind a few thin clouds while the round moon illuminated brightly. There’s relatively fewer vehicles on the street below as well, probably because it’s a weekend. All in all, it was more quiet and peaceful than the previous nights.

 

Sana started humming along with the music from the living room while waiting for Dahyun’s reply.

 

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:21): nothing much, just watching Lucifer. Tom Ellis is hot, I’m not gonna lie_

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:22): Please. The girl who played as Mazikeen is hotter. I’d let her choke me, tbh_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:24): Someone’s kink is showing, huh_

Her eyes widened as she just realized what she replied. Her face began to have a pinkish hue, especially her cheeks. _Oh my god, what was I thinking!_ She screamed inside her head. Thankfully she wasn’t talking to Dahyun in the flesh right now or it’d be a hundred times more awkward.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:29): No!!! I mean! Like she can choke me to death and end my life…. Not in a sexual way… or or anything .__._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:31): Sure thing sweetie. Hahaha._

_sweetie._ It’s just an expression but Sana was a bit dumbfounded for a second there.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:33): Anyway, is that the second season?_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:34): Yep._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:36): Ohh okay. I haven’t started on it yet._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:37): Want me to spoil you? ;)_

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:37): NO DON’T_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(20:38): First of all, Lucifer’s mom is hot._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(20:40): that’s it bye_

_\--_

Their conversation tonight went better than the previous ones. It went from TV series, to movies (with Dahyun judging Sana for she hadn’t seen any Toy Story movie before), and they don’t know how they ended up talking about astronomy, but they did. Sana’s still on the small terrace, occasionally staring at the moon when she waits for Dahyun’s replies.

 

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(22:09): Did I already tell you that I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a child_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(22:11): No, that’s brand new information to me._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(22:13): Well, yeah. I wanted to be one. I was so into astronomy back then. My school would even send me into astronomy quiz bees before._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(22:14): Wow, an achiever. I’m actually looking at the moon right now. Taking a break from watching non-stop._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(22:15): Really? I’m staring at it right now too. We’re both looking at it then._

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(22:17): Yeah… Haha._

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(22:19): The moon looks beautiful tonight, isn’t it?_

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(22:21): It really does._

The moon truly is beautiful tonight. Of course she knows that it translates into a famous Japanese phrase that’s also another way to express love towards someone, but that’s not what she meant by it. Anyway, she hoped Dahyun wasn’t aware of it, because a misunderstanding is something both of them don’t need right now.

 

**_Kim Dahyun_ ** _(22:23): I’d probably sleep now. Mom might come and start lecturing me about sleeping late again. Haha. Good night. :)_

**_Minatozaki Sana_ ** _(22:24): Okay. Good night. Sleep well, Dahyun. :)_

And even if Dahyun did notice, she probably didn’t mind it too. 


End file.
